Reviews of Within a dungeons grasp

4 Reviews

  • Writing Quality
  • Stability of Updates
  • Story Development
  • Character Design
  • World Background

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Personal preference: I like stories where the author uses his creativity and creates stuff; like, the mc's ability to sing and tame monsters. Reading on, I remembered that I have a problem(minor, like really small) with western-styled names. I feel my inner self flinching every moment I read a novel with them. Back to the novel, I really like seeing how the characters of a novel look like; how their voices sound like; how their bodies look like(are they lean, fat, bulky? Or just a plain stick-figure since they're children?) And yes, I noticed a major problem in the first two chapters. I mean, you didn't mention if they were in a modern, or ancient world, right? And in the next chapter(c2) the protagonist mentions the end-boss systems of games. Like, I don't know if this is confusing to other readers, but this just jolted me out of my immersion. But I thought that maybe, this is a modern world, otherwise how'd they name grenade 'grenade' even if the names in this world are based on something called 'typos'(I applaud your creativity, dude) [Personal Opinion: this story feels like a fun one, but more of the lighter ones. I have an idea, it'll also make the mc more interesting; kill grenade!] Well, after chapter three I now know that the world is a modern one. I don't know if I've missed something, but you haven't mentioned the ages of the characters yet, have you? (God this is confusing) "Hey Branch?" "Yeah?" "Do you mind if I sleep in your bed tonight?" ( ͡o ͜ʖ ͡o) ( ͡o ͜ʖ ͡o)( ͡o ͜ʖ ͡o)( ͡o ͜ʖ ͡o)( ͡o ͜ʖ ͡o)( ͡o ͜ʖ ͡o)( ͡o ͜ʖ ͡o) Anyways, onto the next chapter - Ohhhhh, now I understand the naming. Annd yeah, the world chapters can be allocated to an auxiliary volume in Anyways. Good. Grammar - 4.5/5 = Easy to understand, no typos, simple vocabulary. Extraordinary in, mediocre in RRL Characters - 2.5/5 = I don't know how they look like; neither do I know what their age is. And they all feel somewhat lifeless to me(which is an inherent flaw of the first person view system, I agree) Describe everything more would help. Story - 5/5 = Author is creative and everything is new. Story development - 4/5 = Slow, and light paced. I don't like the types of dungeon stories that are too fast or slow, so I think mine is biased a bit. Word Building - No comment. I like how you mentioned the future villain in the first ten chapters. Zhe author'z skillz - 5/5 = is noob maybe, in creating stories; which I've noticed after seeing the various problems. Is this hareeeeem? Anyways, I'd like my review swap, thanks.
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It's a good novel, Author writes dialogues very well but he needs to improve on the description and very short chapters help pace well but he should write a bit more so that readers can be completely involved in the story
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FIRST!! Great concept, the mc has an interesting ability, the ability to tame monsters by singing I think, he only made one sleep on c5. The chapters are quite short but overall, it's a fun read with great potential.
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