A lovely story with a promising plot. We are presented with an interesting protagonist, who is beautifully portrayed as a young but strong woman with a side of youthful naivety.
This story certainly has potential, as it is both relaxing and entertaining to read.
If I may give you some tips in order to help you? I apologise if you find them uncalled for.
There is no need to add comments on the end of your chapters - ‘to be continued’ or ‘we shall see next chapter’ -, it disturbs the suspense a bit...
Another tip I hope to give you is to add less ‘she said’ or ‘he added’ or other variations in your dialogue. It’s unnecessary and tiring to your reader.
These, of course, are all simply some small style changes that don’t deserve to called ‘real errors’. I hope you have a lot of fun continuing your work, you have talent, keep going!
A must-read for fans of the mystery and fantasy genre.
Sigheti