After living for nearly three full centuries I would imagine I've have seen everything.

Honestly, I like to think that time is just a blur. With the state of my mind, time feels this way, especially when I've been traveling this godless and forsaken, roadless path through moment after moment of self-inflicted peril and irrational thoughts.

Everything isn't fine though. I'm hiding away from the pain of it all but... I'm not acting as myself. How can I?

I can't... I'm not human.

What use does a vampire have to regard life as so precious? Especially when I only act in a position of righteousness after shamelessly murdering my victims.
How does that objective fair in the face of my lack of moral action?

I'm not sure really. All I know is I'm desperate to try to twist back the hands of time. I'm trying to undo the mental knots and tear down the bricks as fast as possible. I don't want to lose him! I can't do this alone! Maybe, just like before, things might not go as planned and suddenly I've got this tiny life I'm desperately holding in my hands but-! Was this what I was meant for anyways?

What had the man in Black with wild eyes said to me all those centuries ago? I can't remember but it was important.

But what I do know is there is him. That special human of mine. He isn't insane. His mind is intact. I crave it so.

He's got this witty charm about him and his blood tastes like small caramel chocolates that you just can't get enough of and here I am, wondering how he tastes so sweet.

Everything seemed fine at first.

It was the typical night.

The usual lust-sated kill.

The sound of blood splattering across the ground while listening to another poor victim choke on the last of their life blood. And then he was there beneath me and I stared into those vivid beautiful blue eyes of his.

Except him...
How could I kill something so beautiful? So captivating.

I wonder how he's going to deal with this...
I've stolen him away from his home. Kidnapped him even.
I think I found my comfort in life. Maybe life isn't so damned after all.