Chapter comments on the chapter of the book Supreme Lord Shapeshifter

Comments

Gili
LV 5

Gili

The narrative style is just bad. English is bad as well. Concept is fine. All in all a lot of space for improvement.
9mth
view 7 replies
may1st
Okies! I understand what is being portrayed here, but I think you should elaborate more. It's a system story cool, but the starting is too fast pace to hook readers.
1yr
view 3 replies
CookieChiara
MC: Ooooh, a human! Imma kill it Me: Oh ****, I just wanted to comment and now I’m gonna die MC: Whahahahhahaha Me: Oh, you meant the author MC: ... Another human? Wow!!!! Me: Oof
9mth
view 3 replies
_mori
LV 4

_mori

Author, it must guy do you good to rewrite this chapter. Especially the portion before his reincarnation. That was pitiful. It was just empty. You basically said: MC was born. MC stalked, then killed, got caught, got out, killed again, killed scientist, and died because of a “varied” device. It’s not my place to demand you change it, but I’m sure you understand that, on top of the fact that you haven’t included a synopsis, you let your potential readers start of with something so lack luster. It’d do you good to flesh it out. You don’t have to give a more sciency explanation for his death, or a reason why he kept killing. You just need to keep in mind that it’s going to be the first thing readers pay attention to in your book. Really hope you change it.
9mth
view 0 replies
KeyLessHeart
leave it.....its unbearable very bad grammar
9mth
view 0 replies
Sandy_rock_muffin
Dude, grammarly is free and works on Google docs, which is also free. Just write the chapter in docs, fix up the grammar so that it is readable, and ctrl-c/ctrl-v it onto inkstone.
7mth
view 0 replies
Krizantem
Hi , people author here , I read most of the comments and reviews on this book and I want to give a good news to you people , about ten days later , I and other native editor and a person who has experience in editing the books will going to edit the book from the start.So for now , thank you all of kind comments and reviews , just know that book will not going to stay like this and it will be edited , thank you !
7mth
view 5 replies
Azathoth_PlotGod
Why do i feel i just signed my death certificate by adding this story to my library...
9mth
view 0 replies
TagDaReaper
Nice concept. Need a litter work on spelling and grammer.
9mth
view 0 replies
KIING
LV 6

KIING

The story seems good but the english is so bad. It’s barely readable. You should get an editor.
7mth
view 0 replies
KeyLessHeart
lousy starting
9mth
view 0 replies
AquaMarini
Psychopaths are charismatic and it is hard to tell that they are what they are. Sociopaths are the ones who have issues socialising generally...
11mth
view 0 replies
Sayad_v1
Mc parents died>mc have loss thread> Mc is a killer>mc is top killer. Lol it feels like being force feed, no way to question.. it's not info dumping. At least put some supporting info..
8mth
view 0 replies
bushhacker_420
This story or a waste of time. The Grammar is off. Mixed up pronouns. Go read Supreme Magus for a good read
9mth
view 0 replies
Eternal_Ouroboros
This is the first chapter and I'm already liking it! Great hook,, I'm also refreshed with this first chapter. The reason being that most novels, especially those that concern a system of sorts, consist of huge info dumps and text walls making us readers extremely confused and having to read and re read a few times. It's perfectly fine to properly lay out the world's rules and laws at a decently slow pace, and its inner workings and lore can be inserted later as a form of world development/building. Very good organization on your part author-san! Thanks for the chapter~
11mth
view 3 replies
armagedon
hey, you should use some other way that isn´t as repetitive as saying "Martin" at the beginning of every paragraph, it´s way to repetitive and i´m so fed up with it. Also it´s way too fast, you should slow down, put more detail.
11mth
view 2 replies
Allayah_AL
the concept is fine and all but please improve the english i'd be nice thx...[img=recommend]
1mth
view 0 replies
thelightedghost
I wanted to add that the narrative is way too fast paced but noticed that everybody feels the same.. Why do authors want to rush such kind of stories.. Dude.. Chill down! Nobody is hunting you . Just take your time and have fun while writing
3mth
view 0 replies
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