Chapter comments on the chapter First Wish of 3 of the book I Will Soar The Multiverse (Completed)

Decent start - main critique is that it flows very mechanically and feels like a robot is the narrator (however it's understandable considering you probably used grammarly which corrected the grammar and typos). If you can get yourself a native english speaker/editor to go over it and just switch some words around it would be golden.

WHAT ABOUT RESPAWNING? I THINK GAME CHARACTERS DO THAT TO RIGHT??

Wait a minute... Sora... Soren... 3 wishes, but only using 1... Story came out after mine!... You thef! XD jk, I hope this will be enjoyable

Good Work

👍👍👍

Xxxx

xp

Interesting first chapter, I definitely like the premise, but so far the first chapter feels a bit stiff and mechanical, but I am looking forward to how the story Like you said, you can improve in time, and at least the grammar is pretty good. Thanks for the chapter .

Thanks for the chapter

Harem or no harem or no romance?

Thanks for the chapter

Thanks