Reviews of Dance Between Mortals and Immortals

12 Reviews

4.48

  • Writing Quality
  • Stability of Updates
  • Story Development
  • Character Design
  • World Background

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hazzz1234
Its good but dunno if i should bookmark because takes long to upload ._....____.....________.........___________........._...._____.......________.........
2mth
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Shionokami
Alright, this is my cup of tea as i really like stories like this, whathever comes next Im hoping it only gets better from there! Keep up the good work Author!
4mth
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Hua_Li_An
I've only read the first chapter, but I'll definitely keep reading on. However, since this is an honest review, and I wouldn't review it any other way since I found great potential in it, here goes: Points to consider: -Grammar and Paragraphing: Frankly, there were a lot of problems if we look at it technically. Basically: the lack of commas, repetition of some words, and some wrongly used terms. I've also seen the need to improve the sentencing and the formation of paragraphs. The paragraphs are too long, and usually that's alright if there's only one idea in that block of text. The problem is, there's a lot of info crammed into one big paragraph, and it hurts the eyes to read. -Flow of Story: The general flow is really nice, but the lack of polishing (grammatically) sorts of ruins it for me. -Length: For a Webnovel, the first chapter might be a tad bit too long, and it might have seemed like that too because of the long paragraphs and sentencing. Great points: -The general story is really nice and interesting. The world already seems large and complex, with themes of war going on. I can see the father's love clearly in the text, so a plus point there on characterization. You also tied the ending up nicely with how the father's words in the woods (while hunting) actually foreshadowed the event at the end of the chapter. So, I think that was a nice literary touch. To conclude, "The Errors I Made" is a novel with high potential, yet suffers from its proofreading. I would still continue to read it since I could sense the talent beneath the hastily written words, but I could only hope that it be edited more thoroughly so it can shine a little bit better. In other words, it is a classic example of a diamond in the rough.
4mth
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Avidfan
I was actually shocked by the first few chapters. Luckily the girl didnt really die xD The english is actually pretty good and the story flows well. I think the paragraphs for the first chapter may be a little long. But otherwise this is an awesome story and I'm sure you will have alot of followers;)
4mth
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Nightingale367
I've only read through the first ten or so chapters, but I do have to say that there's a interesting plot to it and that it'll only get better from what I'm reading now. Keep up the good work author.
4mth
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SnowPenguin
The story is well written with a good pace, and set in an intriguing world. The plot synopsis alone is interesting and promises a long story and a grand narrative.
4mth
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Sandy_Jefferson
Lovely. This writer writes like he had a story arch pre-planned with character profiles.👥 The story flows well and the side characters are 3-dimensional. Aside from a few obvious grammatical errors such as run on sentences🙈. This is very very well written. However, I'm still waiting to see how the reincarnation aspect comes to play. Might be the only weak link in this story, seems unnecessary. We shall see. I'm happy to overlook it due to quality of the writing.👍
9mth
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Astrapor
Big peepee novel! Not good at this, i'm doing it to support the author.Even though sometimes there are too many character pov, the stroy flows great and most of the characters are tridimensional. Am i at 140 characters yet?
12mth
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Ravingmaybe
Read it since it was on RoyalRoad and before the rewrite, liked it then, like it now, cant wait for future updates, hope every other reader enjoys it too!
1yr
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Connor_Blasing
Wow. This is surprisingly good. Only minor criticism is I want more of certain characters, but I feel like story is a slow burn so few complainants!!!! MORE CHAPTERS PLEASE!
1yr
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FrostBite_MN
Excellent start. Highly recommended. Chapters are longer so you are getting more bang for your buck. Keep it up author. You will not regret starting the series.
1yr
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JYLewis
Author here! I did not give myself 5 stars ONLY mirroring a honest review on the other site I post my story. Webnovel probably if I were to be brutally honest the superior version (as far as edits goes). Here is a real review of my first ever reviewer on the other site. This is a great story, and I really look forward to seeing where it goes. I'm currently caught up to chapter 43. The characters are fun, and the mystery surrounding the different groups is enough to keep you guessing. There are very few grammatical errors, and there are also some aspects of the story where I'm really trying to wrap my head around what is going on. (Mainly these are the parts that are shrouded in mystery, and we aren't told that much just yet. ) Overall, this is a great story, and I recommend diving right in. END Please feel free to comment and review I love interacting with people who read my serial.
1yr
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