After a minute of going back and forth, Lisa finally arrived together with the butler.
"Why you're so late?!" I groaned as soon as the door open. She looks at me and there her strange look again.
"We just bought food." she hissed as the maid arrived with the wheel chair since she can't still walk after a year of being under Coma.
It was really a miracle that she woke up again a week ago but things wasn't that good, Lisa's body is very weak, her body is numbed since she was just lying all the time. She also lost a part of her memories, she couldn't remember some parts of the last three years before the accident but the doctor told us that it was just temporary and it'll come back soon. What terrifies us is that Lisa develops Face Blindness, she cannot recognize familiar faces and often cannot distinguish among the faces of strangers, the doctor told us that she had Prosopagnosia but still she needs to undergo some test to see the details about it.
It wasn't common for an accident victim to have such but it was still possible. The doctor advised us to speak everytime Lisa is around cause she could recognize us with our voice. And that's what we're doing.
Lisa was brought at the living room so i followed and sat on the couch next to her.
"How was it?" I asked pertaining to her meet up with that girl.
"So sad It wasn't her." she pouts disappointedly.
"Well i did expect it was her, she's strange but i can feel she really knows you." I said remember how that Jennie gasp when she saw me.
"I don't know her. Her voice isn't familiar." she remarked. "But the dress she's wearing, it feels like I've seen those before."
"My god Lisa, who would know that dress sold a thousand of pieces." I said and she just nod.
This was even harder or the hardest maybe, days after she woke up, she's looking for someone she doesn't know. She's asking where's her girlfriend.
"Who's there?" Lisa asked as soon as i entered the room.
"it's just me. " i spoke as i place the clothes she'd wear later. We decided to bring her home very soon. "I think i should put on a name tag." I joked out and i hear her soft chuckles.
"Maybe." She whispers.
"By the way Rosé." she called my attention. "Why is my girlfriend not coming?" She blurted that made me choke on my own saliva.
"Yes my girlfriend. I miss her. When will she visit me?" She asked and i could see she was serious.
"I don't know if you're joking or not but as far as i remember, you don't have one." i mock her.
"No. I have a girlfriend!" she insist and i know if she can move her body, she already slapped me.
"Okay so if you have one, what's her name?" I asked forcing myself not to laugh at her cause who wouldn't, when someone suddenly woke up and ta-daaa she has a girlfriend.. maybe in her dreams.
"Uhm..i don't know. I can't remember her name." Lisa pouts.
"Maybe you're still dreaming. Hah anyway we'll bring you home, you need to be strong so you could find that girlfriend of yours."
And when she says she has a girlfriend, she really has. The last five days we're home, she never stops bugging us, she said she knows her voice, her figure. She always insist that her heart knows her.
* * *
I went straight to the airport after my last session with my therapist. It's been days since the last time i saw Jennie. I wonder how she's doing right now? I know I might have been a bit harsh, but it was the only way I could fight breaking down right in front of her.
I couldn't even explain how the whole situation made me feel. Should I feel relieved that she was only in-love with someone who wasn't real? Or should I feel insulted? Because if she has stronger feelings for someone who doesn't even exist, then what does that say about my worth?
I know she's with me, but a huge part of me feels that it was only done out of sympathy and conscience – because she knew it was the right thing to do, not really because she loved me more.
I plugged in my earphones as I waited for the plane to board. This was it. I was leaving Seoul for good and there was no turning back.
As I watched the plane I was going to get on from a distance, I heard someone shout my name from behind. I quickly pulled out my earphones and turned around to see Jennie standing behind the seats across me.
Awkwardly looking at my surroundings, I slowly got up and walked towards her.
"What are you doing here? It's so late"
"Were you really going to leave without saying goodbye?" she asked, giving me a weak smile. Her eyes were bloodshot red and it looks like she had been crying.
"I thought it might be too cliché" I replied calmly, swallowing the lump on my throat. "And i thought you don't want to see me again."
She just stood there looking at me. She's wearing the dress that my mom gave her. I thought she would never wear that.
"You're going to make it big in U.S." she said softly. "I know what you're capable of, and I'm really proud of you."
"You've believed in that dream of mine since we were young," I forced a smile. "I don't think I would have done it without all your support."
"You would have done it either way because you're that good," she said.
I frowned and looked at her empty hands. "Hold on, how did you get in here without a ticket?"
A mischievous grin crept up her lips. "I managed to sneak in."
"Wow. Didn't know you had that in you," I raised an eyebrow.
"I think I've changed a lot in the past few weeks, believe it or not," she shrugged.
Neither of us said anything for a while. We were just both looking at each other, like as if we were waiting who was going to lose it first.
"It really sucks that we ended up in this situation, huh?" she bit her lip. "I always believed it was you and me until we were old and gray."
"I did too," I said. "A lot of people say high-school sweethearts never last though."
"We always said that we were different," she pointed out.
"That's true," I agreed as my eyes lingered on hers. We were together for years and I still think she's the most beautiful girl in the world. I can blame that Lisa from her dream all I want, but at the end of the day, I knew I could have done something to prevent all of this from happening.
I could have done everything to make sure that she was happy. I could have treasured her more than my career. I could have spent more time with her and done extraordinary things with her. I could have taken her with me in all sorts of adventures. I could have been her other Lisa. It's weird cause i lose the battle of myself between me and her.
"I'm going to miss you,im so sorry for everything i did. I have no idea you're seeing me in your dreams." she sputtered, trying to look away from me. "I'm going to miss you so much, damn it."
"How did you know that?"
"I happened to. And im sorry for not letting you explain. I know i sucked up." she bit her lips, i feel like I've been letting go of the treasure i once was keeping for so long.
"Let's not make that a big deal Jen. It's just a dream, im already over with it. And I understand what we can give and can not." I smile at her. "You have no idea how much I'm going to miss you," I shook my head, trying to find the right words to say. "But you believe that at least for now, this is what's best for us, right?"
"I guess so. I don't really know what to believe anymore," she shrugged and looked down on the ground. "I just... I'm so sorry for everything. I've been a horrible girlfriend and I don't want you to leave without knowing how sorry I am."
A part of me wished she just came here with her ticket and all of her bags, ready to board on the flight with me.
And then it was time. We had to board on to our flight, and a long line was starting to form behind me.
I placed my backpack down and walked closer to her until we were only a few inches apart. "Jennie?"
"Can I kiss you one last time?" I whispered.
Tears rolled down her cheeks as she nodded slowly. I didn't even wait any longer. I pulled her closer by the waist and pressed my lips against hers. I was going to miss this more than anything.
Our lips moved in sync until she softly pushed me away as she pointed towards the door. Everyone else had left and the security was just waiting for me to follow. I gave him an awkward nod and turned my attention back to Jennie.
"I'm going now."
"I know," she stammered. "Have a safe flight."
I hesitantly let go of her arms and bent down to pick up my hand-carry bag. "You never know when we might end up bumping into each other one day."
"Until we randomly bump into each other in the future then," she smiled.
As I walked almost backwards, my eyes never leaving hers, I gave another smile and mouthed, "Good-bye."
"Bye," she waved.
"Jennie," I called one last time before heading out the door. "I love you."
I could feel her heart breaking a few feet away from me.
"I love you, Jongin."
With that, I stepped out of the door and headed towards the plane. I almost had to run since I was the only passenger not yet on board.
As I got up the plane, I could still see her from a distance. Although I couldn't see her face clearly, I knew she was crying. I could already feel the tears brim in my own eyes. It took every ounce of strength in my body not to run back to her and just change all of my plans.
. . .
This was the first time that my dream was starting to become real, and not in a good way. I still vividly remember that time I dreamt of visiting my apartment with Lisa, and all of Jongin's things were gone. Everything was sinking in now. I just lost one of the most important people in my life and it was my entire fault.
I slowly entered our bedroom, well, now just my bedroom. Half of the closets were empty, he didn't leave clothes or whatever, but I could still smell his scent lingering in the room.
I bit my lip and went in his studio. All of his paintings were gone too, but when I looked at the corner of the room, I saw one small painting left, lying on the floor. I bent down and picked it up, only to realize that it was the first ever portrait that he had ever done of me when we were in high-school.
I ran back to the bedroom and snuggled underneath the sheets. The tears were uncontrollably pouring down my cheeks.
You won't really realize that you've messed up big time until everything comes crashing down and there's nothing you can do about it anymore.
I closed my eyes and hugged my pillow. Looks like crying myself to sleep was going to be my favorite thing to do.
Kai left me, and i just found out that Lisa is alive, but didn't know anything about me, all in one single day,my life summarized. And now im left alone.
More Privileged Chapters
Download the app and become a privileged reader today! Come take a sneak peek at our author's stockpiled chapters!Download
Please switch to the pop-up to complete the payment.
Complete daily missions to get rewards.Learn more about the rules
This's an experimental test for reading assistance in case.
We highly recommend you to enjoy the beauty of the original words.