byTraaq - Profile

Also, not sure how you will explain the delayed chakra awakening, but maybe you could say that his chakra was feeding his body to make it stronger and only now is his body strong enough to have some left over. It could help with explaining his naturally stronger One Piece body.

Hey Author, just want to start off with saying that I think you’re doing a pretty good job so far. As for the powers, please don’t give known eye powers/bloodline limits. It’ll be difficult to explain why the son of Might Guy and a civilian have known Naruto powers. As for giving powers similar to animals, I think it could be fairly interesting as long as there’s a reason Kai can give to everyone else. I think the easiest way to write about getting powers, is maybe something like giving Kai a One Piece body w/ knowledge of fighting techniques or maybe even Haki. It could be explained by saying Kai has a naturally powerful body and he created these techniques similar to how Might Duy did the 8 gates. Maybe you could even have Kai improve the 8 gates so the user doesn’t die. Any way, keep up the good work. I’d love to see this story to the end.

It’s sometimes are to distinguish where someone is talking or thinking because you use “ for both. Try to use “ for talking and ‘ for thinking.

As for the Devil fruit, it should be something low key but really useful. Maybe the Panacea could cure the sea weakness of the Devil fruit?

Use this time while the lucky potion is still working to buy some stocks or something to earn steady money.

I mean, Tonks reaction is a bit much… She says he’s always a liar, how would she know that? She can most certainly hear Vernon mention no food for a week and possible beatings they he used to get.. She has to be imperioused or something right?

You should make this bus be able to fly, go to the depths of the sea and be able to shrink (maybe everything in it goes into a stasis so things don’t fall off shelves of something) so he can put it on a chain or keep in his pocket.

This Rosier chick is getting really annoying

Why was he punished? The Hat said he could ask any questions he had and it’s silly that he was called to the Headmasters office in the middle of the sorting ceremony. Although it’s not really a complaint about the Headmaster, since it’s a common theme in most FanFics, but he’s worried about Felix turning into another Tom, but doesn’t realize/ignores that he isn’t a child harming psychopath and the other orphans love him….