Krishna_Oza_0838

LV 3
2024-05-10 Unito Global
Badge 5

Moments 8
Krishna_Oza_0838
Krishna_Oza_0838
3 months ago
Commented

........

Krishna_Oza_0838
Krishna_Oza_0838
1 years ago
Commented

its stated up that he didnt know about the academy, now he is remembering people talking about the benefits there????

Back at Ross Academy, Klaus had overheard many students talking about their dreams of getting into the Celestial Mountain Academy. From what little he knew, the benefits of being accepted into such a prestigious institution were immense. If he could gain admission, it would change his life and his mother's forever. The opportunities would be endless. All he had to do was take that first step, and once he set foot there, the future would open up with limitless possibilities.

The Last Paragon in the Apocalypse

The Last Paragon in the Apocalypse

Fantasy · Pen_Drop

Krishna_Oza_0838
Krishna_Oza_0838
1 years ago
Posted

Well, lets start with bad things and then good things. 1- Writing quality is good if we consider the grammer and such but its written in a way that is very hard to understand what is happening. Like in starting chapters you are referring the opponent az 'That man ' or 'the man' but you can give more info on why is he bulling them. what are girls thinking. not just what their eyes are doing. one more thing is like sometimes the story just braks in between and then whusshh its back on track but missing few important parts. 2- character design can be improved. give more info abt the characters. in the early chaps the characters are like dolls talking with each other. next is dialogue. if you're putting it a POV please put a mark so we understand who are we looking the story from. 3- the good part is the story has good premise and power levels untill i read. so keep up for unique ideas. 4- i dont know abt updating stabilty so full 5 star for that. 5- world background is decently intriduced as story peogresses but as mentioned above the story just breaks in between and that just takes focus away from the story. A pointer- the story feels monotonous and its boring that way. try to have interactions of character and not just this happened and after that that happened. anyway, this is just my opinion. keep up the good work 👍.

Krishna_Oza_0838
Krishna_Oza_0838
1 years ago
Posted

Good start, a uniqu story. I'll update again in later chaps.

Krishna_Oza_0838
Krishna_Oza_0838
1 years ago
Posted

Good start, a uniqu story. I'll update again in later chaps.

Krishna_Oza_0838
Krishna_Oza_0838
1 years ago
Posted

Good start, a uniqu story. I'll update again in later chaps.

Krishna_Oza_0838
Krishna_Oza_0838
1 years ago
Posted

Good start, a uniqu story. I'll update again in later chaps.

Krishna_Oza_0838
Krishna_Oza_0838
1 years ago
Posted

Good start, a uniqu story. I'll update again in later chaps.