章 28: Week-To-Week Tomfoolery

(A/N: I decided to be nice and post this chapter now instead of the 4th. Also, I've decided to create a filler chapter because I have that power. This is so I can develop more characters with different character interactions along with passing time and covering more events!)

[Timeskip - 5 Day]

[Narrator's POV]

Nazarick's Bar. An area that could be found on the 9th Floor. While there wasn't any official name for the place, most denizens of Nazarick, if not all, referred to the bar as such. The establishment had quite the victorian aesthetic to the place. However, there were also splashes of modernism to the bar such as having flat screen TVs bolted to the victorian walls and other appliances.

Three people could be seen walking into this bar. There was one man outfitted in a plague doctor outfit along with two beauties to his left and right holding his hands. The rather short lady to his left wore a gothic style of clothing while the lady on his right had a white general's outfit.

This trio was, as you had guessed, Citrinitas, Esdeath and Shalltear.

"Citrinitas," Esdeath spoke out in an alluring tone that slightly pissed off Shalltear. "I was wondering… since I've been watching over Kuuderika, when could I have a child of my own?" Shalltear got slightly less pissed as she used the provided opportunity to jump into the conversation.

"Yes! I've watched over Ureirika for a few days now and I believe I've done an excellent job! Does this mean we can make hot, steamy love in your room and produce a child together?!" Citrinitas hummed as he thought about what to say next.

"That… let's wait until we get our drinks sorted out. Alright, Esdeath and Shalltear?" The duo grumbled under their breaths as they tightened their grip on the alchemist's hand. While slightly let down, deep in their hearts, they both knew that their wish would eventually come true.

As that happened, the three of them got settled on the circular seats in front of the main island table where drinks would be typically handled. Not before greeting Sous-Chef, who was polishing some glasses with a silky cloth.

"Would you like the same drinks as you did last time?" Sous-Chef asked, putting down the glass he was polishing. "I would," Esdeath said with Shalltear nodding at Esdeaths words. On the other hand, Citrinitas said something different. "I'm fine with whatever you'd personally recommend, Clavu," The plague doctor asked. The myconid bowed as he got to work preparing the drinks.

"Now, the answer to what you both were saying moments earlier:" Citrinitas took a slight pause as he needed to be quite careful with what he said to the duo. "Eventually." Right after Citrinitas said those words, the duo internally celebrated like there was no tomorrow, all the while keeping calm externally.

'Huh,' Citrinitas first thought, eyeing the woman's reactions. 'Esdeath and Shalltear would have pinned me on the floor by now. They're slowly learning…' By this point, Sous-Chef had finished creating the drinks for his guests as he slid them onto the counter towards each person.

The plague doctor put down his hood and took off his mask, placing it in his inventory before taking a sip of his drink. "Hmmm… thank you, Clavu. Your drinks are fantastic as always." If Sous-Chef had a visible mouth, he'd probably be smiling from the praise. "I greatly appreciate it, Lord Citrinitas."

The two focused their attention from the drinks they were indulging in, to their beloved as they noticed his voice changed from having his mask removed. At the sight of his face, the hue on their cheeks turned slightly red from blushing.

"Anyways, I say eventually as relationships take time to develop. I know you're both doing your best, but the two of you still have plenty to learn about. There's no need to rush things."

"B-But Citrinitas!" Shalltear exclaimed. "I've learnt everything there already is about raising children properly! I've read all the books from Ashurbanipal bestowed by my creator, Lord Peroronchino! A week was more than enough!" Esdeath also argued this point. "Mmhm! While I hate Shalltear, I must agree with her on this matter… please fuck me."

"Let me phrase things this way: The Supreme One's true goal is world domination, correct?" Esdeath and Shalltear nodded as they took a sip of their drink, all the while Sous-Chef listened in, cleaning more glass cups. "If that's the case, why is it that Lord Ainz hasn't used Nazarick's army to subjugate the world? It would be much easier and a faster thing to do rather than what we're doing now."

Esdeath was the first to speak once Citrinitas finished his proposed question. "Obviously, rushing world domination would do more harm than good. There are plenty of reasons as to why going at a slower pace is better, but I'm sure we all know that."

"The same thing applies to relationships."

It was as if a bomb was dropped on both women's heads or as if a switch had been flicked on. Their eyes widened with realization as their mouths went slightly agape from awe. "Ohhhhhhhhhh… that makes so much sense…" They replied under their breath at the same time.

'My goodness,' Citrinitas first thought. 'I should've said something like this much earlier! Oh well, that gets into their brains now. Hopefully, things progress smoothly in the future. For example, no bodily fluids in the food that I consume or giving the twins torture devices. If all goes well…'

'I wouldn't mind accepting their request…'

[Timeskip - 10 Days]

[Scene Change]

To say Nfirea Bareare was nervous would be understating how he was truly feeling. But, those feelings had a rightful place to be there as who wouldn't be feeling queasy if you're about to meet an important figure in your field of study? It would be like a passionate college student who was studying science having the opportunity to meet Stephen Hawking himself.

And who was Nfirea nervous to meet, exactly? Well, who else other than the plague doctor and grandmaster alchemist, Citrinitas? Given the opportunity to visit Nazarick with Enri and Nemu, why wouldn't he want to meet an alchemist far superior to his grandmother, let alone himself?

"And this is the entrance to Citrinitas' Alchemy Lab, Nfirea." The homunculus maid, Fifth, said in a mannerly tone as she gestured to the grand door of the Alchemy Lab. The young pharmacist fidgeted with his fingers as he gazed at the massive door in front of him.

"In the name of everything holy…" Nfirea was in utter disbelief, double-checking to make sure his eyes weren't lying to him. Not only was this door one of the most expensive things he had ever seen in his lifetime before visiting Nazarick, but he could also feel the vast amount of magical power that was leaking out the door's small crevices.

"Mmhm!" Fifth hummed joyfully. "Citrinitas and his acolytes have already been informed of your visit. Just open the door and I'm sure one of his assistants will bring you to the grand alchemist himself!" The pharmacist turned his head to face the maid as he gave a quick nod of understanding.

"Now, if you need any help during your visit to the Great Underground Tomb of Nazarick, you can find me near the 9th Floors communal area! Take care!" Bowing with her hands together, the homunculus maid left Nfirea to his own devices.

Taking a few deep breaths, the pharmacist pushed open the heavy door before stepping into the Alchemy Lab, per Fifth's suggestion. No words could describe Nfirea's instant admiration for the place, even from only having one foot inside the lab.

Multiple levels that were filled with powerful magical items of all kinds. A plethora of thick and heavy books lining bookshelves embedded into lavish-looking walls. There were complex-looking, potion-making contraptions that were on almost every alchemical bench in sight. Everything that could have been possibly needed for an alchemy lab was here. And that made Nfirea slightly drool.

The pharmacist might as well have been looking at a top player's town hall 14 base compared to his measly town hall 2 base in Clash of Clans when comparing what alchemy lab he had in Carne Village.

As his eyes feasted upon the scenery in front of him, a calm and echoing voice spoke his name. "Greetings, Nfirea Bareare." The suddenness of the voice caught the pharmacist off-guard, startling him. "I… uhm… you must be Lord Citrinitas! It's an honour to meet you, Sir!" Nfirea said hastily, quickly identifying the origin of the voice and recognising the attire of the man who said his name.

"It's quite the pleasure to meet you too. Please, there's no need to wait at the entrance of my lab. Come in and have a look around. Feel free to ask any questions once you're settled in." The plague doctor gestured to his alchemy lab behind him as he moved from where he was originally situated to a few paces opposite the pharmacist.

"Before I do that, I must first thank you personally for saving Enri from being killed! Words can't express how grateful I am to you, Lord Citrinitas! She is the love of my life and I can't live without her!" Nfirea exclaimed, giving a heartfelt and well-due thank you to the alchemist.

Citrinitas smiled under his mask and hummed before he spoke. "That's not an issue, Nfirea. As long as Lord Ainz wills it, I will gladly defend Carne Village again and again. Now, enough formalities." The pharmacist nodded at the alchemist's request as he stepped into the Alchemy Lab, getting a closer look at things from the inside.

'This place is absolutely amazing…' Nfirea thought to himself. There were so many unique and captivating trinkets he didn't know which to ask about. Eventually, once the both of them were sitting down, ready for a proper conversation, Nfirea decided to ask about the potion-making apparatuses that caught his eye.

"Lord Citrinitas, the potion-creating equipment scattered throughout your lab is easily five- no, ten times more advanced than what I have in Carne Village! May I ask what type of potions you make with them? Do you perhaps create God's Blood with them?" The pharmacist questioned in an almost pleading tone due to the amount of respect he was trying to show the mysterious plague doctor.

"Well," Citrinitas started. "One of those potions I'm currently experimenting with and refining is a personal creation of mine I call Slurp Juice. While I would delve into details, I hope you understand that what the Slurp Juice does is classified information."

"And by God's Blood…" The plague doctor opened his inventory as he pulled out a vial filled with red liquid and a golden trim. "You really mean [Minor Health Potion], correct?" The simple way Citrinitas said that sentence made Nfirea's jaw drop.

'D-Did he say… minor?' The pharmacist asked himself internally. 'I'm truly in the presence of an alchemical god. Lord Citrinitas, there's so much I want to learn from you. Maybe one day I could be your apprentice…' Nfirea put those thoughts aside for the time being as he focused on talking.

"Y-Yes, that's the same potion my grandmother was able to acquire. I've been trying to recreate the potion with ingredients provided to me but with different degrees of success…" Nfirea noted as Citrinitas put the potion back in his inventory.

"That brings me to another question that's also sort of a request. I-If you don't mind listening to me, of course!" The pharmacist put his hands on his knees as he promptly bowed, awaiting the plague doctor's reply. "Very well. I'll help you where I can if it's reasonable." He said rather ominously.

"I… I need some help on an issue or at least some input from a master alchemist such as yourself. It's just… my stamina potions… they're not good enough…" The boy trailed off, darting his eyes away from the plague doctor and towards the ground.

"Not good enough? In what ways?"

"My girlfriend is CRAZY! Not actually crazy as Enri is a blessing. But crazy in the SHEETS! My stamina potions don't seem to be doing their job properly because even after consuming three of them, Enri still isn't tired! I need your help or advice as to how to improve my potions!"

Citrinitas could only blankly stare at Nfirea's face, not saying anything, which made the pharmacist realize his grave mistake. 'Oh… shit! I shouldn't have said that! Lord Citrinitas probably… no, definitely thinks lowly of me now! What will I ever do?! My dignity is all gone! Enri's gonna kill me!'

As Nfirea was having an internal mental breakdown, Citrinitas was processing what he said.

'What the hell do I say after that mini-bomb? Do I give the guy some strong stamina potions?'

[Timeskip - 3 Weeks]

[Scene Change]

Today was one of those days where due to their duties as Floor Guardians, Esdeath and Shalltear couldn't watch over Ureirika and Kuuderika. It was a rare occurrence, but they happen. Thankfully, two people were watching over the twins in their absence on the 5th Floor.

Citrinitas and Cocytus.

"Hahahahaha! Don't hit me with the snowball yet, Kuuderika! I haven't finished making my snowballs!" Ureirika, the twin in pink winter clothing shouted playfully, using her arms to unsuccessfully block the snowball thrown at her.

"Sorry sister! I couldn't help myself! Miss Esdeath said to me to always take the opportunity to strike at an unsuspecting enemy!" Kuuderika closed her fist and raised her arm into the air, similar to a victory pose of sorts.

While the two played in the snow, Citrinitas and Cocytus were supervising not too far away. "Citrinitas," Cocytus started in his usual echoing and metallic voice. "Do. You. Think. I'd. Be. A. Good. Uncle. For. The. Supreme. One's. And. Your. Future. Children?"

"Considering you've been doing just fine with the twins, I'd say you'd make for an excellent uncle, Cocytus. There is no need to doubt yourself." Citrinitas reassured the insectoid, who huffed another round of cold mist.

Just as the final words came out his mouth, Ureirika and Kuuderika ran over to where the duo were standing. "Citrinitas! Cocytus!" Ureirika shouted as she moved her tiny legs across the snow. Kuuderika was not far behind her sister as they soon reached the duo.

"Can you play snowball wars with us? Pretty please?!" The twins pleaded in unison, clutching their hands together and giving the both of them puppy eyes that couldn't be refused. "Snowball. Wars. Huh?" Cocytus said to himself.

"Are you playing in teams?" They both nodded. "Yes! I'm the hero and Ureirika is the Demon God!" Cocytus made a humming sound before huffing more mist.

"Then. Citrinitas. Prepare. Yourself. As. I. Am. The. Servant. Of. Demon. God. Ureirika. And. Will. Bring. Wrath. Against. The. Hero. Kuuderika!" Scooping Ureirika with one of his hands, Cocytus pulled out a wooden sword on another as he pointed it at Citrinitas, who was next to him.

"Impossible…" Citrinitas muttered under his breath. "Our comrade, warrior Cocytus, has betrayed us in service of the Demon God, Lady Kuuderika!" He said in a playful, yet frantic tone, which caused both twins to laugh. "As your dutiful mage, I will fight and protect you till the very end!"

Grabbing Kuuderika by the hand, the plague doctor cast [Teleportation] to create some distance between Coytus and Ureirika. "Lady Kuuderika, what is your plan to defeat them?" Kuuderika smiled as she crossed her arms. "Citrinitas, we fight them with snowballs!" Reaching for the snowy ground, Citrinitas quickly formed two snowballs and gave one to Kuuderika. "Then let's give them hell…"

[Timeskip - 10 Days]

[Scene Change]

"Citrinitas, It's a pleasure to meet you again. I sincerely thank you for taking time out of your day to converse with me and generally catch up with one another." Greeted a certain arch-devil civilly as he gestured for his colleague to sit down in the empty seat opposite him.

"I'm delighted to make your acquaintance, Demiurge." The alchemist replied to the devil's politeness in kind, situating himself on the lavish seating. Unlike months ago when the demon met up with the plague doctor in Nazarick's Bar, this area was more like a private meeting room you'd find within a high-profile office. The only difference was that this meeting room was easily more luxurious.

"I presume you want some insight about progress with the plan involving the Dragon Kingdom, correct?" Demiurge adjusted his glasses. 'A keen eye as always, Citrinitas. As you're leading this part of the Supreme One's Grand Plan, I'm curious as to what you're planning.' He thought to himself. "Precisely." The arch-devil said, putting his hands on the edge of the meeting room table.

"In terms of Ordan Karris and his adventurer team, things are preceding as anticipated. The different political factions have been thrown into a power struggle, fighting against one another in the hopes of vying for control over the adventurer team. With the nobles in disarray, the Dragon Kingdom will be weakened for Lord Ainz's future nation to easily seize control both inside, and out."

Demiurge processed everything Citrinitas said, but couldn't help but be confused about something. 'Something isn't right. I'm missing something here…' He thought to himself, carefully concentrating. 'There's more to this. I know it. I'm just not seeing the bigger picture. Does Citrinitas know something about Lord Ainz's plan that I don't? That's the only logical answer here. Damnit…'

"Other than creating a draft attack plan for Claughuth to follow, there's no progress for the invasion yet. This was due to my focus on the now complete Slurp Juice potion, other alchemical tasks, and the test I provided Esdeath and Shalltear. But, that'll soon change in just a couple of months…"

The mentioning of the test for Esdeath and Shalltear got cogs turning in the arch-devil's complex mind. "I've been meaning to ask, what will you do with Ureirika and Kuuderika once the test for Esdeath and Shalltear is over?" The question made the plague doctor deeply contemplate.

"As you know, children's skin provides the best for scroll manufacturing. So, when you have children of your own, will the twins be sent to the Happy Farm for skinning? Or perhaps once they're older, they'll be used for breeding?" Demiurge questioned, waiting for a response from the plague doctor.

'That's not happening.' The alchemist internally said to himself. "Their sister was considered quite the prodigy back in the Baharuth Empire. So, I want to see if they have the same talents and magical aptitude when the time is right. After all, Nazarick is looking for New World subjects to recruit."

"Ahhhh, that make's a lot more sense now. I see what you're planning…" He mused under his chin. 'Wait… huh? What am I planning, Demiurge? I just didn't want that to happen to the twins!' Citrinitas said to himself, in the same manner, Ainz would in his mind.

"On the topic of kids, when will you sire children yourself with Esdeath and Shalltear?" He asked.

"That will happen eventually. Just not for the foreseeable future. I find it fundamental that to raise a child properly, both parents need to be ready by having knowledge on how to raise one beforehand." Demiurge stroked his chin. "An interesting take. That does give the child maximum potential to be the strongest they can be as their parents are prepared to raise them the best. I see what you're up to…"

"Putting that aside, have you made any breakthroughs with crossbreeding on the Happy Farm?"

"Unfortunately, there has been little to no progress on that front," Demiurge said with clear regret in his voice, yet still kept his professional tone. 'I'm thoroughly disappointed in myself.' If the arch-devil was alone right now, he'd most certainly take his anger out on every child in the Happy Farm by having them skin themselves just because he had that type of power.

'Citrinitas, you're truly better than me. You can provide exceptional results in alchemy while I can't even crossbreed two species together. Not only that, I can only provide scroll material up to the 3rd Tier! What do you see that I don't?' Demiurge put those thoughts away as he continued talking.

"But I digress, I know it's possible. Queen Draudillion and the existence of cambions and nephilim's from YGGDRASIL is more than enough proof for me. In any case, do you have any suggestions as to combat this issue, Citrinitas?" The demon asked. The alchemist adjusted his seating as he tried to think about an appropriate answer for the scheming devil.

'I don't know. Make them fuck harder, I guess?'

The plague doctor shook his head. "Sadly, none come to mind." Hearing those words, the arch-devil nodded before delving deep into his thoughts once more.

'I'm an absolute MORON!' He shouted to himself internally. 'Obviously, Citrinitas wouldn't know a clue about breeding issues as I'm the one conducting the experimenting, not him! Once again you've made yourself a fool, Demiurge! I've just presented myself as incompetent in front of a very important colleague! Citrinitas most definitely thinks ill of me now with how many fuck-ups I've done!'

"You know, time can be your best friend and worst enemy. Like what I said months ago, no matter if it takes months or years, I'm certain you can find a solution to your experimental failures, Demiurge." The plague doctor continued, giving the best words of encouragement he could.

'Your intellect never ceases to surprise me, Citrinitas. I truly thank you for your words of encouragement. I'm envious of the wisdom you've picked up over the years by being so close to the Supreme Beings back in YGGDRASIL. I could only speculate what your thought process is like…'

'Hehehe, got that quote off a shitty inspirational tweet years back. Man, Twitter was a cesspool…'

"Thank you for the words of encouragement, Citrinitas." The arch-devil said kindly. "It's not an issue at all. Now, while I'd love to talk with you more, I have to get back to the lab as time is running short on my end. I do hope we can converse with each other in the future."

Soon after, Citrinitas left Demiurge with only his thoughts to accompany him. 'I look forward to our next meeting, Citrinitas…' He smiled wickedly before he stood up, heading back to the Happy Farm.

[Timeskip - 20 Days]

[Scene Change]

A group of three people could be seen sitting on a picnic blanket. Next to the blanket was a semi-large umbrella that blocked the light from the fictitious sun of the 6th Floor. Though, that umbrella was partially useless due to the picnic blanket already being near the Gigantic Tree. Nonetheless, the view and surrounding area made it perfect for Citrinitas, Kuuderika, and Ureirika to have a picnic.

"Mr Citrinitas," Kuuderika said softly as she looked at the maskless plague doctor. "I'm full." The alchemist turned to the twin before bouncing her words back at her. "You're full?" He questioned, not in a sarcastic way, but in more of a sweet tone. "Mmhm!" Kuuderika hummed. "Me too!" Ureirika shouted, looking at her stomach and rubbing it with her hands.

"Well, the both of you have eaten quite a lot of the lunch provided by Shihoutsu Tokitsu." The plague doctor noted before he put a hand on Kuuderika's head. "I still can't believe that this rascal over here," He rubbed her hair, causing it to become a slight mess. "Ate my burger!" Citrinitas finished in a playful manner as the twins lit up in laughter.

"Hehehehe… I'm sorry… but it tasted sooooo good!" Kuuderika pleaded with Ureirika furiously nodding. "Your fries, Mr Citrinitas, were also very yummy! In the future, can you feed me again while saying: "Here comes the aeroplane?!" I loved that a lot!" Ureirika exclaimed with passion.

While Ureirika didn't know what an aeroplane was due to the vehicle not existing in the New World, she did enjoy the comical action Citrinitas performed for her. However, before the alchemist could reply to Ureirika's question, two sudden voices jumped into the conversation in unison. "Ureirika, Citrinitas fed you fries?!"

The voices were from none other than Shalltear and Esdeath, who exited a portal a couple of metres away from where the picnic was. "Hmmm? Esdeath? Shalltear? May I inquire why you're both here?" Citrinitas asked the two as he turned around to face them.

"Well, to be with you, of course!" Shalltear said as she quickly walked over to the sitting plague doctor and hugged him. Esdeath wasn't one to be left behind as she sat left of Citrinitas and put her head against his shoulder. The twins, who were watching the whole thing unfold, giggled wildly.

"Now," Shalltear temporarily stopped hugging the alchemist as she looked her beloved right in the eyes. "Can you please feed me fries too?" Shalltear pleaded, doing her hardest to form puppy eyes. The man could only internally sigh at the vampire's antics before the ice queen joined in.

"Actually, Citrinitas," Esdeath stop leaning her head on his shoulder as she too looked him in the eyes. "Can I feed you fries? You've been working very hard and need a break." Within an instant, Shalltear turned and glared at the demoness, who only replied with a small, sly smile.

"Yes! Yes!" The twins said simultaneously. "Do the "here comes the aeroplane" for Shalltear and Esdeath, Citrinitas! Pretty please!" Both women frantically nodded as they started at the ruby-red eyes of the alchemist. The plague doctor looked at the faces of the twins before sighing, unable to say no.

"Fine, fine. I'll do it." While he didn't show it, Citrinitas internally smiled at all four of their antics.

Next Chapter: Prelude to War

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(A/N: Quite a fair bit of stuff happening in this chapter. I wonder if Demiurge believing there's more than meets the eye involving the plan is really correct? Who knows... for now at least. Anyways, I tried to develop the relationship between Citrinitas, Esdeath and Shalltear more here. Hopefully, the character development is good and you liked it. Speaking of liking, how was the chapter? Good? Bad? Please, let me know your thoughts!)