Kratos5628 - Profile

Kratos5628

male LV 2

Just a lone dude doing his best in life.

2022-07-02 入りました Global

バッジ 2

Moments 7

Kratos5628
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Kratos5628
Posted

Alright here is my review of this story. I think you should add more originalty to your character. Your charcter gives gary stu vibes to me like everything is going his way. Now don’t get me wrong we all like our mc succeeding after all self insert is a wish fullfillment fantasy but you have to make your charcter work for it. You could have used peter parker’s intellect to give himself powers through science or magic it could have also served as charcter development and world building for the charcter. Instead of the plot device which was genie. It also lacks originality as I previously mentioned. Author is just copy pasting his mc in canon events. He could have used comics as a reference and created challenges for the mc which would have furthered his character development and could have deepened his bonds with other characters in the story. Now my final complaint from this story would be is that mc is too op for his current scenario. I mean we all like op mc that is not the problem the problem is peter is facing street level villians like lizard or octavius while he himself is a planet destroying entity. He is atleast planet level on power scale while he would probably grow more stronger. There are no stakes involved here I could easily predict that mc would curbstomp the villians easily. This is not meant to discourage the author in any way just pointing out thefacts hope author would improve. cheers.

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