J4YBO

The Defilement was a form of Corruption that had spread from the Estuary, and there were six champions of it… Dread Lord, Devouring Beast, Undying Slaughter, Torment, Soul Stealer. And Mad Prince.

J4YBO

4mth

Commented

it makes no sense for one paragraph kaiser says 'you should be dead' implicitly stating he knows the guys identity only to have the next few make out like he seems familiar 🧐

ch 123 Chapter 29.6 - Banquet

Hunter Academy: Revenge of the Weakest

Fantasy · Darkness_Enjoyer

J4YBO

4mth

Commented

copy and pasted! hearing the same thing explained multiple times I'd annoying but this.... this is just lazy

As Astron disappeared into the thick fog, Ethan's heart ached with a mixture of anger and despair. He desperately wanted to go after his fallen comrade, but the reality of their dire situation bore down on him like a crushing weight.

Hunter Academy: Revenge of the Weakest

Fantasy · Darkness_Enjoyer

J4YBO

4mth

Commented

the editing on these chapters is cheeks 😔 which is unfortunate because I feel the story has potential. Sentence structure and word choice is off and seems like a translation without a fluent English editor to help

ch 25 Chapter 6.2 - Lessons

Hunter Academy: Revenge of the Weakest

Fantasy · Darkness_Enjoyer

J4YBO

5mth

Commented

Don't see how a quick and decisive ambush is a way to test your upper limits... especially when your not a assassin/theif/rogue type character 🤷🏻‍♂️

The moment was ripe, and Kaden knew he couldn't let the opportunity slip by. This would be a quick and devastating ambush if he had anything to say about it.

Re: Apocalypse Online

Fantasy · Shameless_Neet

J4YBO

5mth

Replied to Eric_Fanguy

yeah OK 👍🏻 must be amazing where you come from, kids graduating 10 yrs early as standard. Intelligent young adults struggle with half what she is doing but sure 🥱

Violette could feel the pride oozing off of the man and decided this was the perfect time to break it. Pride was an undesirable trait to have when you had to obey orders.

New Eden: Live to Play, Play to Live

Games · Galanar

J4YBO

6mth

Replied to AutumnPlunkett

I was talking about taking them into the boss room 🤷🏻‍♂️ obviously if you need 'x' number of people to open doors, then people are required but like you said... they don't have to go in once opened

This book has been deleted.

J4YBO

6mth

Replied to Galanar

That very well might be true as I'm sure there are some children who are pretty advanced maturity/intelligence wise.... but these kids have it much better than the average working class by far. Those be massive silver spoons the kids in this story were raised with! This isn't even to mention what atrocious parents they have, allowing them access to a hyper realistic, hyper violent & explicit game that induces major trauma even to adults 🤷🏻‍♂️ On the whole I like the story and most characters obviously to get to this point by reading about the kids age after them doing stuff that sounds so off base just breaks the immersion.

Gale was unreachable since the incident outside of New Eden. He had said he was going on a trip to regrow his self-worth and power.

New Eden: Live to Play, Play to Live

Games · Galanar

J4YBO

6mth

Commented

again these are not 6yr old at all 🤦🏻‍♂️

Violette could feel the pride oozing off of the man and decided this was the perfect time to break it. Pride was an undesirable trait to have when you had to obey orders.