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Cool! I JUST BINGE READ THE WHOLE FCKING NOVEL IN ONE SITTING!!! :( I dont have a life :( But it was worth it.........i think! Oh, and more chapters pls!!!!!!! View More
Playing with other Supernaturals · C131
1 day ago
THIS IS GOLD!!!! Thans! Fucking hell........awesome chapter! View More
Playing with other Supernaturals · C104
1 day ago
It would be cool if he advanced normal science too and made space ships etc, and check out other planets! View More
Playing with other Supernaturals · C44
1 day ago
What about his exoskeleton?? I hope he will not forget technology just because he has powers now!! View More
Ruler of Iron and Flesh · C18
3 days ago
See this! I just gifted the story: Balloon View More
Ruler of Iron and Flesh · C16
3 days ago
I hope not everyone will be shown as evil in the Empire.....because thats just cliche! They had battle together, maybe in boot camp they would have been harsh and ruthless with him......but after a battle that THEY lost and he survived.......he would be their comrade in arms. I dont see why would they do that! And the Empire should have its reasons too! I cant wait to know them! View More
Ruler of Iron and Flesh · C16
3 days ago
Yeah, quite a surprise that they just captured that mecha like that.......i mean, i would have self destructed it instead of it falling into enemy hands! And it was supposed to be full of enemy soldiers........yeah......a little "odd" ending! View More
Ruler of Iron and Flesh · C14
3 days ago
Thats why Michael should develop tech with his super mind.......strong af robots and cyborgs space ships........those could stop the villains for good! And it would be easier for the heros too!! View More
Reborn in My Hero Academia with Superman powers · C11
4 days ago
The whole conversation just felt so unnatural.....i dont know why.....and fast! Too fast! View More
Reborn in My Hero Academia with Superman powers · C8
4 days ago
Super intelligence, yet he could not make a simple code only he knows??!! PLS do nto make the mistake of making hima a genius when he can only fight! He should be able to predict things, have almost perfet memory.......so this is bull**** and could easily create things too! View More
Reborn in My Hero Academia with Superman powers · C7
4 days ago

Pablo: k... the novel is fine but there are a lot of things to improve on it, starting with.
1. Its been a while now since a lot of people point out that you wrote 28 years old in chapter 1 when it should be 18 and it still hasnt been fixed despite you thanking a reader for pointing it out and its been months!!!!.
2.world announcements as sometimes it shows the level of the monster, others, it dosnt. Its important for the level to be known as its a difference killing a lvl 10 boss while being same level than killing it while being lvl 30 for example.
3.At the start, it was said that the time was twice as long in the game but then it was said that it was only 12 hours longer and then it got increased that 1 real-world day is 2 days inside which is what was said from the start.....
3. the stats of Amanda in the game are way to high for someone level 7, her stats are 119 in total - 30 stats per level - 60 stats supposing she got all 10 like shadow = 29... Meaning her equipment adds 29 points to her stats in total, thats way to much...... either its that way, she got more than 10 in stats at the start or you messed that up.
4. It bothers me a lot the start of the novel with Shadow and Amanda having to run for accidentally instantly killing the senator's son by making him trip on a rock... even if that was enough to damage his head it won't be enough to instantly kill the guy unless he was to fall on his head from a few meters and im sure that he could have reached the hospital alive even if he were to die from bleeding inside the head.
4. it wasnt stated how the gang found out that mc "killed" the rich guy son.
5. how come Amanda was working full time as the boss of a restaurant if she was THAT good in the game and she could earn thousands dollars... dosnt makes sense and she is even higher level than MC and he is OP
6. Amanda's friend Jeny seems to be from a powerful family, how come she couldn't help Amanda from the rich guy? From what i can see, Jeny could have helped Amanda with no problems
7. how is it possible for a normal guy and girl to escape a hunt from a criminal gang plus the justice for killing a person, not to mention the senator's son!!!, the pair would captured fast and easy as they had a criminal organization and the government searching for them.... and even him becoming a high paid assassin while doing so lol... where did he even get the money for that!!
9. The mc calls little girl the sister of his friend but she is 18 years old, same age as the mc.... LOL
10. why he didnt buy a helmet for Tina? the sister of his best friend?
11. The mc wants money but as soon as he gets a new equipment he tosses the one he had out! lol, he can sell those!
12. Not much is known about the classes, not even the assasin class as what they can or cant do... Such as use 1 or 2 daggers
13. No world announcement was given when the mc CREATED a skill... you would think that such an amazing thing would create a world annoucement but nothing happened...

All things considered, this leads me to believe that you dont have any guide while writing this nor you are keeping track of things. Its likely that you must go back to read what you wrote on X chapter to remember instead of writing down important things on a separate file. I recommend using excel or google sheets to keep track of things
K... try to improve the world background a little and give some more physycal description of your characters. Pls be consistent with the information given

Fate Online: Shadow
4 days ago

Cythraul: I love hearing little things like this! They help me go back and think, 'ya know? Why did I put that it was operated by a steering wheel?' Thank you for your input!

Ruler of Iron and Flesh · C9
4 days ago
Btw, why is a mecha operated by a steering wheel??? Like WTF? View More
Ruler of Iron and Flesh · C9
4 days ago
No matter what, but soldiers would never wear a bright uniform like that to fight......like ever! Thats just suicide! Maybe for a ceremonial uniform its ok but in a war, its a death sentence! View More
Ruler of Iron and Flesh · C7
4 days ago
Just think about it.....he has super intelligence.....he should learn sciences too and advance humanity later on, not just play hero all day! That would be very cool, maybe as a hobby or something! Im quite bored by novels focusing only on fights, fights and more fights! And why not? Maybe when a few years passed.......i dont know cryptonians life expectancy but they must die after some time too.....so why not experiment etc, then make a serum that makes him live longer or something and spaceships to conquer the galaxy etc! PLS! View More
Reborn in My Hero Academia with Superman powers · C5
5 days ago
Bro.....why are you writing a novel when you dont even know when to use past or present??!! Its just embarrassing........the idea is good, but the grammar is horrendous! Im trying to enjoy it but every time i see a basic fcking mistake im blown out of my immersion! Try grammarly or something, you can easily avoid basic mistakes that way! View More
Reborn: Ulquiorra in DxD world · C5
5 days ago
I only ask you that you do not abolish or forbid all the other religions........Just Chatolics are more than 2 billion in numbers........ and NO, people will not give up their faith just like that....You should make him take over them first or convince the leaders to unite! Make a world religion, with all of the good from all of their teachings. BUT PLS do not just exterminate them or try to show them all as bigots and pedophiles.....thats just fcking untrue and boring.
Still, very nice story so far.....i dont know when was the time i enjoyed a story this much! So pls dont fck it up, AND NEVER ABANDON THIS! PLS!

P.S: MORE CHAPTERS! View More
Reincarnated as Tony Stark with a Skill · C81
5 days ago
I was always thinking.......okay you can shrink something.....but can you enlarge something small too?? I mean, maybe Tony could make a space ship like a model or anything else and enlarge it......maybe it could loose its durability because of the expansion...but a frame would still be there so it could speed up constructions etc. View More
Reincarnated as Tony Stark with a Skill · C71
5 days ago
Seriously.....Goose and Fury are golden! I fcking love it! View More
Reincarnated as Tony Stark with a Skill · C69
5 days ago
This was funny as hell! Thanks! OMG, very nice! View More
Reincarnated as Tony Stark with a Skill · C59
5 days ago
And when making the star wars movies he could make some real things for the movie....... View More
Reincarnated as Tony Stark with a Skill · C48
5 days ago
I really like the batman stuff! Nicely done! View More
Reincarnated as Tony Stark with a Skill · C48
5 days ago
I mean, Tony is going into the dictator route quite fast.......i dont really want that.......killing people wihtout a trial, just becuase poaching etc. Thats ****ed up......and yes they could have a family......you know most people who commit crimes are desperate! View More
Reincarnated as Tony Stark with a Skill · C40
5 days ago
Bro......1. Its fanfiction 2. Chakra and other energies and the nanites can help him....... View More

NulZilch: Bro this is just to ridiculous for 1 yr old. Babies don't even have proper motor functions by this age.

Also multiple signal hopping in this era? Are there even systems in the world that can receive and process such huge data?

Reincarnated as Tony Stark with a Skill · C14
6 days ago
I hope magic can be learnt by anyone like doctor strange so he can too! And i really hope there will be epic tech! And reactions from other people to it and to Tony! View More
Reincarnated as Tony Stark with a Skill · C1
6 days ago
Fcking hell.......way too fast...and way too OP! Why did he not just ask to be a god and be done with it if he is already this OP in the 9th chapter??!! View More
I Freakin` Reincarnated With A System · C9
1 week ago
If he started alling him gramps agains his will that would have been funny, but this way........it lost its meaning..... View More
I Freakin` Reincarnated With A System · C4
1 week ago
I hate things like this the most! Purchasing an ability that could easily be awakened naturally or trained......just becuase who knows....... Just because he was an otaku he does not become immune to killing.......that is the stupidest thing......he would have been vomiting his stomach out in that war, and his sharingan could have awakened that time, or he could have saved his brother while killing the attacking person........BUT NO! HE BUYS IT WITH POINTS! WTF??!! View More
I Freakin` Reincarnated With A System · C3
1 week ago
I really hope they will merge, so he will really be Ichigo, just not the same....I dind it unfair if the original just disappears......... View More
Bleach System Within Bleach · C10
1 week ago
Just another novel about a System and its adventures, nothing special it seems........The supposed "MC" cant even create or even try to create a new ability, and again just a puppet of the system! Boring and lame, i dont know why cant these system novels change a little so they are not like all the other ones out there!? View More
Bleach System Within Bleach · C8
1 week ago
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