JimmieHammel - Profile

I like how their wolves are like AR apparition invisible friends who sass them. it's fun.

the story is legitimately cute so far, but it needs more editing. the sentence structure is mostly fine, but the grammar is not.

the tense here is all over the place, switching from past to present and back to past again. it's also not actually telling me a story. it reads more like a summary. I don't feel like I'm in the moment with the MC.

this is not a great start. there's 0 description, just dialog and a minor amount of character action.