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Throne of Magical Arcana · C346
1 year ago

anHilla: Se precisar de ajuda com tradução só chamar. Tamo junto

Creation's Fallen Gods
1 year ago
The content has been deleted
Cultivation Chat Group · C575
1 year ago

RPGrinders: Write more and I read...

A God's Apocalyptic Entertainment
1 year ago

Gosick: I will give it a try 😁

A God's Apocalyptic Entertainment
1 year ago

Zevren: Hey guys Author of the Novel here. I won't say this is the best novel you've ever read.
So i am giving myself a good 4/5.
That is what i am aiming to sustain as i keep writing this, and maybe i can even bump it up to a 5/5 later.
But for now I Hope you guys enjoy the Read

A God's Apocalyptic Entertainment
1 year ago

Zevren: Hey man thanks for the Review, I'll take what you have said and think hard about a lot of the points you've mentioned. I was sort of thinking about the whole rejected by settlements thing because of Ella. But i have no defined story. I should have a story board ect. But everything that i'm putting out right now it off the top of my head, i got no plan. That can lead to things such as no character developments and stuff. But i will work on that. Thanks for reading.

A God's Apocalyptic Entertainment
1 year ago

AsuraMonarch: So far you only expressed the dark side of the mc and he even quickly recovered... and then even tho reluctant at first he sorta got used to killing infected. So if you want to go along with the darkness thingy, you might as well make him a reject of most human settlements, you know having Ella a ruler class as a kin. and he isn't the smartest only having base stats on INT when it first started off, and with people mostly realizing analyze is the most helpful. he could get schemed on.
you know instead of being just rejected, they would plot to kill him. with him having to resort to becoming an infected to survive. i mean it depends, also you never really showed how fast his regeneration is.

also you really need world background like i understand not having any for now. also MC and Ella needs to be more fleshed out, we know that he forced himself to survive so he can take revenge on that bastard god and he becomes calm when in extreme rage, but other than that what?
Ella is only a kid but you should portray her more of a kid with pride, but being thought by her brother to stay lowkey?...
and world background, since internet prob isnt a thing maybe also SMS maybe make it like wanderers or traders. after a month or two of the infection. make it so when they trade with mc they will give gossips, ofc if you plan to let the mc in settlements he can get info maybe fairly easily after a few months atleast on nearby settlements if wanderers and traders become a thing

A God's Apocalyptic Entertainment
1 year ago

Berj: Having read this before in portuguese, I can say that you guys are in for a wild and amazing ride. The history is rich and the world is very amazing. That and the small details in the history itself makes this a very good pick.

Creation's Fallen Gods
1 year ago

Dark_Flower: thank you for your support and advice. I'll keep it in mind

Creation's Fallen Gods
1 year ago

Dark_Flower: Sorry for the first chapters '-'
They were really hard for me... and even so became this mess.
The history is really good, you i'll like it the more you read, but I'm still cant compromise with more than 5 chapter/week. I can offer extras whenever possible, but sure thing only 5 for now.

Creation's Fallen Gods
1 year ago

ZhengJishan: Did Kisaragi station follow her to the new world? She was corrupted by the dark matter right?

Doomsday Wonderland · C302
1 year ago

SabersmanDancer: Why is cold?
Why so cold? Does it have an ice power or can it steal its energy ??? Or ...

Creation's Fallen Gods · C6
1 year ago
Why is cold?
Why so cold? Does it have an ice power or can it steal its energy ??? Or ... View More
Creation's Fallen Gods · C6
1 year ago

SabersmanDancer: A little confused the ending. I don't know what is happening.

Creation's Fallen Gods · C5
1 year ago
A little confused the ending. I don't know what is happening. View More
Creation's Fallen Gods · C5
1 year ago

Half_Bowl_Fairy: I already read in Portuguese until about the 70th chapter or almost. My tip, a bos launch rate is essential here. It does not matter if the story is good but the launch rate is bad because if you do not treat the audience seriously the novel is not going to get public. Readers are equal drug addicts, we will give you our power stones in exchange for the chapters, we feed and make us addicted to your novel, then you will have a loyal audience. A good launch rate will ensure public, public guarantees power stones, which in turn ensures ranking position and the higher the position in the ranking the more readers attracts. It is a cycle, feed it and you will succeed, after all your novel is great, the translation I am not able to evaluate properly.
I'll be rooting for you, for your novel and for the success of both.

Creation's Fallen Gods · C1
1 year ago

SabersmanDancer: Beautiful speech, take your Nobel lol

Creation's Fallen Gods
1 year ago
Beautiful speech, take your Nobel lol View More

Half_Bowl_Fairy: I already read in Portuguese until about the 70th chapter or almost. My tip, a bos launch rate is essential here. It does not matter if the story is good but the launch rate is bad because if you do not treat the audience seriously the novel is not going to get public. Readers are equal drug addicts, we will give you our power stones in exchange for the chapters, we feed and make us addicted to your novel, then you will have a loyal audience. A good launch rate will ensure public, public guarantees power stones, which in turn ensures ranking position and the higher the position in the ranking the more readers attracts. It is a cycle, feed it and you will succeed, after all your novel is great, the translation I am not able to evaluate properly.
I'll be rooting for you, for your novel and for the success of both.

Creation's Fallen Gods
1 year ago

Half_Bowl_Fairy: I already read in Portuguese until about the 70th chapter or almost. My tip, a bos launch rate is essential here. It does not matter if the story is good but the launch rate is bad because if you do not treat the audience seriously the novel is not going to get public. Readers are equal drug addicts, we will give you our power stones in exchange for the chapters, we feed and make us addicted to your novel, then you will have a loyal audience. A good launch rate will ensure public, public guarantees power stones, which in turn ensures ranking position and the higher the position in the ranking the more readers attracts. It is a cycle, feed it and you will succeed, after all your novel is great, the translation I am not able to evaluate properly.
I'll be rooting for you, for your novel and for the success of both.

Creation's Fallen Gods
1 year ago

SabersmanDancer: It's a bit confusing at first, a lot of missing information.
I know it must be a mystery, but knowing nothing makes me frustrated.
It seems to have a lot of potential, but I feel lost in the first chapters.
More, author I need more.
How about 2 chapters a day?
I would give 4 or 4.5.

Creation's Fallen Gods
1 year ago
Reading Status: C1
It's a bit confusing at first, a lot of missing information.
I know it must be a mystery, but knowing nothing makes me frustrated.
It seems to have a lot of potential, but I feel lost in the first chapters.
More, author I need more.
How about 2 chapters a day?
I would give 4 or 4.5. View More
Creation's Fallen Gods
1 year ago

zokimi: Glad there was a flaw in that dream world

Doomsday Wonderland · C302
1 year ago

Aragami9: Weird sniffing girl? Dark matter in body? Abnormal pocket dimension?

Doomsday Wonderland · C302
1 year ago
The content has been deleted
Doomsday Wonderland · C302
1 year ago

fat_mermaid: These are the effects of mushrooms. If you do not remember them ...

Doomsday Wonderland · C302
1 year ago

Skully_: Spoilers within.

Originality - 5/5 This is an original story. I applaud on_a_jeep for creating an original world, plot and powers. I enjoyed following the MC as she, I assume she because she wore a dress, walked through her world.

Story - 4/5 The plot is very good. However, it is let down by weak or lazy descriptions. For example. Hope is in a conversation protesting the fact he is assigned as Ava's bodyguard and the story then states.
"I felt bad for him, so I convinced Hope that I would protect him."
This sort of shortcut is repeated often during the story. The author should have taken the time to SHOW not TELL the reader how Ava convinced him and it would have taken some time. Because he was quite adamant that he didn't want to do it.

This is just one example of a shortcut was taken instead of showing what happened and these shortcuts ruin a great story.

Another example.
Grandpa says "This gun has enough firepower to penetrate the armor of a tank with one shot. A new invention. You'd be surprised by how much technology has developed in the recent years until now, the year 2031."

Why is Grandpa talking to the reader? The characters know what year it is. I assume they know technology has progressed but even so, it would be more like grandpa would say something like "we have these new prototype guns which can shoot through the armour of a tank."
I can only guess the reason that grandpa said this was the author didn't want to go to the trouble of explaining the technology of the world and the year. Hence another example of taking shortcuts instead of describing what was happening.


Characters - 3/5 The MC has a distinct personality. I was a little confused how she went from demure and pacifist to a stone cold killer.
The parents were confusing. I get the "evil" side. But I couldn't make sense of their motivations. They were used as a plot device. And logic be damned. One of my questions is, why did they bother wiping her memories? They could have just jailed her and experimented on her. Why after all that work and time in hiding did they decide, ok we will kill you now you are useless? Now there may be answers to these questions but it wasn't explained. And I am left to assume the parents had a role to play in the story and there was no work done on their goals and motivations.


Flow - 3/5 The flow was ok. I was able to understand most of what was happening without re-reading a sentence or paragraph. There were times when I wasn't sure who was talking as there were only quotes with no attribution. The grammar was good in parts and other parts it was particularly bad. And while I am not judging grammar, I am where is affects the flow. In this story it does a few times every chapter.

Suggestions: Don't be lazy and take your time to **SHOW** everything to the reader. You have a great story but the delivery made it hard to receive.

Epiphany of the Weak
1 year ago

Rookie11: Btw, can Shuhang use appraisal on himself? So he can see if he is the reincarnation of Slow witted Song

Cultivation Chat Group · C558
1 year ago

Randomizer: Ha! suppose so, I figure he's either the person himself or his descendant, I'm leaning towards some time travel accident that hurls him back in time? or he gets powerful enough to time travel, I like both those possibilities far more than the descendant one, for obvious reasons, or am I just completely wrong? ;)

Cultivation Chat Group · C558
1 year ago

CaCao: Thanks to this identification ability our Song will be able to speed up and improve its cultivation, now it has only to run 5 km on four limbs! I'm just wondering what should he do with the other demonic cores that represent other animals! swim for 5km, climb trees, howl at the moon ....

Cultivation Chat Group · C558
1 year ago
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