I'm a simple man you see, so I like girls a good book with preferably some mature contents in it, like sex scenes and the likes. I've many things that I like and even more that I hate
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I'm NOT MOTHER TONGUE, I appreciate if you take this into consideration before reading this story The Human Vincent Ross stumble into a pseudo-post-apocalyptic world, armed with only a strange tattoo that enables him to steal "power" form his enemies and his pajamas... What will Ross do to survive into this familiar and broken world? Come and find out Warning!! I plan on writing EROTICA in the future (For those who don't know the difference between an Erotica and a Smut, is the fact there is plot and feeling before the act of coitus... instead Smut is just plain Porno with a little bit of plot in it)
Marvel King · C1
AlucardDCLXVI: aaaaaaaaannnnd Library. :)Evolution (A Nier: Automata Fanfic) · C1
EternalDrunkenSage: L'idea di base non è male, ma tutto va troppo veloce con pochi dettagli è anche leggermente confuso.
Ti consiglio di eliminare il romanzo per poi riscriverlo mantenendo il tema, la storia e lo svolgersi degli eventi, ma metti più cura nei particolari arricchisci il mondo cerca di dare un senso a gli avvenimenti che avvengono o meglio ti consiglio di non fare un grande sconvolgimento di eventi tra una frase e l'altra come quando a risvegliato il suo quirk.
Dai profondità al personaggio cosa gli piace e cosa no, cerca di dargli alcune ambizione,scegliere il carattere del personaggio sara una tua scelta perché questa e la TUA storia non chiedere i pareri del pubblico perché facendo cosi creerai una storia traballante, imposta alcuni corsi di azioni alcune cose che rendono il tuo personaggio speciale,Rendi la tua storia UNICA nel suo genere.
Questa era la mia critica costruttiva e spero che ne prenderai spunto.
Da Italiano a Italiano passo e chiudo.The meaning of strength stopped
Aces_Mark: Nah man ive read the chinnese one there are similaritiesas it is a fanfic so its to be suspected but he seems to be addin his own spin on thingsAbsolute Stealing · C4
A Commonplace Story of Overpowered Sorcerer · C52
CapGrizzlyBear1203: I just read all interesting comments and I just got a say one thing. Perspective. In the villager's eyes, the Jinchuriki are demons (The tailed beasts are more like chakra spirits), and in a way, they aren't wrong.
Killer Bee, for example, can literally merge with his tailed beast and I'm not sure about others but that screams demonic possession to me.
A more realistic situation would be: Would you be friends with the son of a renowned murdered that has literally killed thousands and also that son has a reputation for being a 'trouble maker'.Not to mention that the murder killed and if not severely injured some if not all your family members. I know I wouldn't.
I know it sounds close-minded and it is, but that's life. We judge people by their appearance, personality, background, family, etc, we just got a deal with it. It's easier to see the injustice from a third-person perspective where like the reader basically know everything.
Naruto's (Fanfic version) perspective is a lot easier to explain. For him, he's done nothing to deserve the hate but still, he's being othered and isolated with lots of people being prejudice towards him. Discriminating against him. From his eyes, they are evil incarnate.
The fact that Kurama literally did nothing (to them) and people still hate and fear the "Nine-Tailed Demon Fox" just for being powerful and dangerous does not help lessen Naruto's perspective.
Anyway the moral of this little analysis is that humans are a bunch of d!cks! They ruin everything just cause they're scared of the unknown and scared of the known.Gamer Naruto · C43
Auren02: Betrayal is when one either goes against an ally or does nothing as the ally is getting hurt or being killed. You know for a fact that the Leaf will get attacked from so many times and all Naruto will do is simply watch it happen. He's not going to do anything. That's the betrayal. Plus, this doesn't go against the rule of having his Gamer Powers. (You shall not harm innocents.) Technically, he isn't harming them nor is he obligated to help anyone. The Gamer System gives him the ability to unfettered by everything. Not to make him a hero. If you want to make a point of Hinata being saved then chalk it up to Naruto sees himself in her a little bit.
Beginning chapters give proof to what I'm talking about and besides, he hates the Leaf to his very bone.
You know what, you're right. I haven't shown how much Naruto really hates the Leaf. I'm going to make a chapter for that. Thanks for the idea dude and thanks for reading btw.Gamer Naruto · C43
SyrnZero: Good luck to find some good reading for youMy Overpowered Loli Wife · C1
Ero_Usagi: Putting stuff that actually will have a big impact to the canon making this story quite weird and hard to swallow....................................My Overpowered Loli Wife
Daoist029716: Thanks for the help. 👍Having Her as My Waifu, WHO NEEDS A HAREM?! · C3
Having Her as My Waifu, WHO NEEDS A HAREM?! · C1
Killer of MC’s · C38
Einlion: He can die in a record, but it would just send him out of the record. No matter what, unless Vahn gave up living, he would continue to live forever.Endless Path : Infinite Cosmos · C273
Asmodai216: Writing Quality: Trash tier. The grammar is awful, you can tell the writer isn't a native English speaker. It's legible, you can understand it, but a 5 minute spelling and grammar check on each chapter isn't too much to ask for.
Stability of Updates: The author Seion writes a bunch of different system based stories and updates all of them with great frequency. This is great as far as updating the story goes, but it seriously detracts from the quality of the story. An author churning out multiple updates a day for different stories will end up suffering when it comes to quality and foresight.
Story Development: Like a lot of the sub-standard wish fulfillment series on this site, the pacing of the story is very quick. Characters who should gradually build up a relationship with others are instead instantly won over for no real reason, and a bunch of plot points are not thought out well... Whatsoever... At all.
Character Design: The MC we're given is freaking ridiculous. I personally appreciate an MC I can relate to, but I usually like an MC that has a fleshed out character. This MC fails to react with anything resembling common sense, decency, caution, or any other reasonable character trait. For fucks sake, in chapter 8 he literally molests a goddess and goes on to say that he likes things to be consensual.
Speaking of, the characters from the series are massively OOC with no real explanation given. Sure, some basic traits are there, but they are railroaded onto whatever path the author wants with no explanation other than, "Hurr durr, Hestia is cute, I don't care if she's a virgin goddess who only fell for the pure-hearted Bell after he spent months earnestly supporting her, I want her to get with my supah awesome MC." I don't even care if he stole her from Bell, just make it actually make some damn sense.
Then there are the background characters who just go along with this complete bull****.
World Background: The only reason this is getting 2 stars is because of the ALREADY FUNCTIONING world provided by virtue of being FANFICTION. Frankly, the additions made regarding the system, the MCs abilities, and his self-insert into an adventurer's body make no goddamn sense whatsoever.
"Hey Eina, I'm already level 3 despite not being in a familia. It doesn't matter that even having a level at all requires someone to have a falna, I'm supah aweshome and you'll totally believe me"
"I've never been apart of a familia, even though the body I took over was actually apart of one before I got here."
Summary: This is a pretty standard work for the author, Seion. Crappy grammar, characters and powers that don't make any damn sense. Railroading into relationships that don't make any damn sense from the chicks standpoint. Generic crappy wish-fulfillment fanfic is trash.Dungeon System Within DanMachi
Overlord of Sin · C2
Sis-Con with Dimensional Chat Group · C158
Celestails: Im starting to hate this mc playing the emotions of different girls without care 1st he lied to his younger sister just to have s*x with older woman 2nd he confess to other girl just because he's afraid to attack his sister like wtf dude ur using other ppl for ur convenience thats not coolSis-Con with Dimensional Chat Group · C157
F1nal: Make those purebloods mysteriously dissapear en masse, keep them stunned and then release them after the Wizengamot meeting to strike even more fear. Ofcourse you can curse them with some plotarmor parseltongue so that they wouldnt go against him anymore too.New Dawn- A Harry Potter Transmigration Fanfic · C151
ImmortalMaou_sama: It's Hermione. Author, has already made sure of it, when Harry keep saying Hermione's father, his father-in-law in his mind. I usually like Harry-Hermione pairing, but in this fic I rather have Ginny, Penelope or even Daphene. Hermione's only redeeming quality is she is Harry's first friend.New Dawn- A Harry Potter Transmigration Fanfic · C149
New Dawn- A Harry Potter Transmigration Fanfic · C149
Harem God of Origin (ATG) · C34
Harem God of Origin (ATG) · C13
Ryuu23: He knew that he was too weak, but still tried and got a kickback. Very ... stupid decision. Eh. I do not like such moments, but the novel itself as a whole pleases. :)Harem God of Origin (ATG) · C12
Harem God of Origin (ATG) · C12
airambach26: Get his biological mother in the harem also his sisterHarem God of Origin (ATG) · C9
Nirvanic_Sun: You have a blank character you can make into ANYTHING you want, yet you kill her off because it's easier than writing an original character? It makes the protagonists tears feel like they're fake, story dropped.Re-Nisekoi · C2
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