Fortigan - Profile

Not your preferred language? Here to Choose your language.

Fortigan

LV 3
2019-09-19 Joined Global

Badges 2

Moments 5

Fortigan
Posted
I'm going to be blunt and give you the good and the bad, starting with the bad. While I am really enjoying the story, it's grammatically broken in so many ways. It's not so bad that it's not readable, but the author desperately needs an editor that is fluent in English. I'd say, on average, there are at least 2 typos/grammatical errors in every paragraph. Mixing up past and present tense is a constant, words are used improperly, etc. "Was" and "were" are not interchangeable. "Pass" is not a substitute for "past" or "passed". "Redundant" does not mean what the author thinks it means. "Though" and "thought" are constantly mixed up. Most cultural phrases or saying are quoted wrong. Some stuff is just simply odd, such as "xyz character scratches their HAIR in confusion". Seriously, the list could go on forever as it's a grammatical nightmare. Now, on to the good. The characters are very interesting and there is great character development, though I'd like to see more internal group drama/interactions. The overall story is easy to get into and has excellent pacing, making it easy to binge dozens of chapters at a time. It's over the top in a carefree and fun kind of way but is balanced with occasional heavy scenes that give it more weight. While I would like a little more descriptions regarding some of the cities, it's actually very well done. An atmosphere is established for various scenes that helps build immersion. Even the political climate is touched on and affects the direction of the story. My advice for the author would be to download the Grammarly browser extension and write in google docs (as Grammarly functions there). This will not only catch a lot of mistakes, but in the process of correcting them, the author will become more fluent in English. Also, it's free.
Fortigan
Fortigan
Fortigan
Fortigan
Report user