Siegfried_Shepherd

1yr

Commented

There's somethin called plan b ain't that big of a deal

ch 140 Trimester

Cyberpunk's Singular Peculiarity

Video Games · Niggross

Siegfried_Shepherd

1yr

Posted

My main and really only complaint here is how little Niggross shows Ori doing nothing in combat. whenever Ori is fighting in a group he gets little to no cool moments in feels like he's just being carried by Six, Max, and Rebecca like it doesn't make sense for him to be the leader of the group first of all and it doesn't make sense he's part of the group at all not to mention that his choice of weapons is poor, he's described to no be a muscle head yet he uses an lmg I think that an overwatch revolver or unity would be more suited to him, all in all I hope that the author researches actual cyberpunk game builds and choses the cold blooded gunslinger build for him which I believe would be the most practical build for how Ori is described and gives him more badass moment like shooting a guy between the eyes from 50ft away and other cool moments

Cyberpunk's Singular Peculiarity

Video Games · Niggross

Siegfried_Shepherd

2yr

Commented

Thanks for the chap

ch 110 A Wolf in Sheep's Clothing

Siegfried_Shepherd

2yr

Posted

The MC, Is bad like really bad there is absolutely no reason for him to be the MC. He's not a strategist, he's not a sly profiteer, he's not charismatic. He's just a normal dude. That might sound good but no, It's really not because every time there's a problem he doesn't have the foggiest idea on how to fix it and walks around like a moron asking everyone how to fix it. When your going to write a novel from someone's perspective the novel will get boring if the MC is boring or stupid or just generally way less competent than his advisors at everything he's not good at anything. I understand not wanting your MC to be a garysue but making him boring with nothing he's good at is not the answer to a garysue, this novel would be a 5/5 for me if the MC was special in anyway, everything but the mc is done exemplary well the author clearly took his time to create this world and it shows but the MC for me takes it down to a three.....................................

Siegfried_Shepherd

2yr

Commented

Overall the narration is ok could use some work but the dialogue is where you need to focus right now, it sounds un-natural and flows weirdly like for instance above when introducing dexter's party you could of done "How are you doing" instead of what's going on this would make it more sensible when dexter replies "We're doing just fine" also use more slang like "what're you doing"

ch 0 1 Chapter 1 Aldelio Alastair

Using Modern Weapons In a Fantasy World

Fantasy · GLC00

Siegfried_Shepherd

2yr

Replied to Metalloid

But not everyone is a soldier, most are day to day farmers and half of the population by medieval standards are not it to be soldiers, also there are children to young to be soldiers and those to unfit

A/N: In one of my previous chapters I mentioned that the population of the Westerlands was around 800,000. I have decided to change this number to around 2.8-3 million, no definite answer as the context behind it was an estimate. I have done this mostly because I believe that I have portrayed Westeros to be smaller than it actually is and future projects I have in store would not be possible with a smaller population. Also the fact that in the books Kings Landing has a population of 500,000, which makes the West seem tiny in comparison.

A Fourth Lion

Book&Literature · SIMA_

Siegfried_Shepherd

2yr

Posted

It's a roller coaster or a dumpster fire you can't stop watching good because it's so bad

My Girlfriend Cheated on Me, so I Moved on With My Life

Realistic · Slusher

Siegfried_Shepherd

2yr

Commented

'Sorry Link I don't give credit come back when your a little hm, richer'

William rubbed his hands together with an expression that I couldn't describe as anything other than demonic and he told me 'don't worry Uncle, give me some time and I will come back with a solution'.

Game of Thrones: The odd-fish

TV · Barbare

Siegfried_Shepherd

2yr

Commented

Trade too

"The Riverlands have cattle and wheat." I replied while raising my eyebrows, "Can you explain to me where this reflection is supposed to lead?"

Game of Thrones: The odd-fish

TV · Barbare

Siegfried_Shepherd

2yr

Commented

You should get a discord where you can run idea's by people and help getting inspiration on how a character would react to cerion's actions like for instance him saving a stark and what would tywin do in response you could ask the discord what they think he would do

ch 17 Sneaking out

A Fourth Lion

Book&Literature · SIMA_

Siegfried_Shepherd

2yr

Replied to Riqu

education and when their educated doesn't change their mental development, and even then consider who tywin is a deeply pragmatistic man who many claim to have little to no feelings getting him to change his mind on anything or listen to anyone whom he doesn't respect which after the kidnapping incident cerion is apart of that category and even before that, during the rebellion he was like 4 so right now like what I said earlier cerion can't really change anything major or convince tywin to change plans and or someone tywin sees no profit in helping

Suddenly, he starts making his way towards me holding the knife out in front of him. Dreading what he is going to do, I start backing up, wriggling away from him with my hands tied behind my back. He steps forward and grabs my jaw in a vice-like grip between his sausage fingers, "I'm gonna fucking love this" he whispers to himself as he plunges the tip of the burning blade into the left-side of my forehead. The unbearable pain spreads throughout my whole body, making me scream out agony, I feel him dragging the knife down my face, causing blood to dribble down into my left eye and adding the stinging sensation too the rest of my torture. As I start to fall into unconsciousness from the pain, I hear a cry off into the distance and the rumble of what sounded like thunder, before falling into darkness.

A Fourth Lion

Book&Literature · SIMA_

Siegfried_Shepherd

2yr

Replied to Riqu

I honestly prefer how it's developing now with him being less than 12 any serious conversation with tywin would get shot down in flames, my personal favorite GoT fan fics are where they have a massive timeskip from the prologue and in the chap before the timeskip they explain his viewpoint on how he's grown over the 14-16 years and family members and major characters views on him.

Suddenly, he starts making his way towards me holding the knife out in front of him. Dreading what he is going to do, I start backing up, wriggling away from him with my hands tied behind my back. He steps forward and grabs my jaw in a vice-like grip between his sausage fingers, "I'm gonna fucking love this" he whispers to himself as he plunges the tip of the burning blade into the left-side of my forehead. The unbearable pain spreads throughout my whole body, making me scream out agony, I feel him dragging the knife down my face, causing blood to dribble down into my left eye and adding the stinging sensation too the rest of my torture. As I start to fall into unconsciousness from the pain, I hear a cry off into the distance and the rumble of what sounded like thunder, before falling into darkness.

A Fourth Lion

Book&Literature · SIMA_

Siegfried_Shepherd

2yr

Replied to Taidanotsumi

It was a comment I saw in a no no manhwa

Charisma - 100

please reset the booktitle kingCH 20231218092329 66

Anime & Comics · kingCH

Siegfried_Shepherd

2yr

Commented

If older tendencies are still upheld in entesia's neighbors and associated countries then why in his right mind did the president make a woman a head of foreign affairs I don't mean that in the sexist sense I mean it in the sense of she's a head of diplomacy that being so It would be immensely better for foreign relations if the head of foreign affairs was non insulting the thinking here in her appointment is illogical and downright stupid

The two diplomats talk about each other's country and their differences for the remainder of the ride. Since Entesia has already dealt with countries that uphold older thinking, Ravenian culture doesn't surprise Laura too much. It's roughly along the lines of expectation, but they also seem to be modern in other aspects. In contrast, Entesia is the only country Harrington has heard of with such a radical and unthinkably different culture. Added to the fact that they invented advanced vehicles, developed aircraft, and built their own ironclad warships, Harrington starts to seriously question who the Entesians really are.