TwinlyDidymus

1yr

Posted

So, let's talk about the positives. The Author can write. The grammar is pretty good and the English clear. Other than that, the characters are interesting but everything else falls short. The story is poor in quality and this feels much more like a rough draft of a potential story above all else. The pacing is bad. I went through two chapters and floored through the wedding in less than half a chapter. You literally crossed Kingdoms in less than a day: like are these just some petty city states less than a few kilometres away from each other? That severely disappointed me. Her hobby and passion is vaguely brought up and executed in a single sentence. And you ignored actions and consequences a bunch. You described an oppressive culture yet she tramples over the norms without a care even though she's the one under the boot of the culture. The story is poorly written. Nothing more than a rough draft that should be redone.

TwinlyDidymus

1yr

Replied to SOe77_WN

Yeah.. A day hasn't even passed... And this is likely the casual pace of a carriage. Don't tell me that these to Kingdoms are next door neighbours.

The caravan stopped, and then a guard informed us that we had arrived. Lucian stepped out of the caravan and offered me his hand. I took it, and he helped me down.

TwinlyDidymus

1yr

Commented

Thanks for the chapter. I like how Animalistic he is. The darkness and the eat or be eaten vibe. 👌

ch 17 Goblin Massacre

TwinlyDidymus

1yr

Replied to Uchiwa_Madara

Not only that, but he failed entirely in the interrogation. Like you learnt nothing other than his presence.

This paragraph has been deleted.

TwinlyDidymus

1yr

Posted

So far everything is pretty good. I hope the author continues this book. Atm I can't rate a full 5 stars as it's just beginning but I'll revise my review once he gets a respectable amount of chapters out👌

TwinlyDidymus

1yr

Commented

Sad baby animal

ch 0 5 An Icey Situation

TwinlyDidymus

1yr

Replied to Ignoble_Immortal

Lowkey pretty cool tbh. I wouldn't mind seeing a greedy lizard obsessed over muh precious.

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TwinlyDidymus

1yr

Replied to VenerableDemon

It's nice tbh

ch 0 1 Born

TwinlyDidymus

1yr

Replied to AYESHA_FAHIM

Facts

This paragraph has been deleted.

TwinlyDidymus

1yr

Replied to Guiltythree

Gotta give credit where credit is due my friend 👌

TwinlyDidymus

1yr

Posted

17 chapters in So I quite like this story for its humor and the characters. I enjoy watching these characters bicker among themselves and these relationships progress. But the comedy and the characters is really what's carrying this story as I don't believe the story and the world is really that strongly built. It's a bit cliche-y and generic. And the writing quality could be better, but it's not bad.

The Villainess with a Heroine Harem

Fantasy · DustyDream

TwinlyDidymus

1yr

Replied to izayoi_nii

I feel like the first is just matter of fact, a factor, a big one, but a factor that is overshadowed by the second one. Also he's literally enslaved to her, and it was forced on him. He didn't come to accept a potential master, instead the decision was made without his consent and now his free will is completely trumped in front of her. It makes sense why dark thoughts would appear because anybody who's sensible would realize how potentially fatal this is: to simply give someone a chain around your neck and hope they don't tighten it isn't a simple matter of trust.

And secondly, and maybe more importantly… he simply could not bring himself to harm Nephis. Not again, not anymore, and not… not like this.

TwinlyDidymus

1yr

Posted

In terms of Webnovel standards, this is a top class read. It beats much of the other novels that exist on this site in terms of; writing quality, story and background development and the design of the characters and the world. Easily deserves 5 stars hands down. Of course, critiquing this in terms of other novels published in the market, I'd still rate it highly. It is one if my favourite stories after all. Easy 4.5-4.8. Oh yes, and the author can write good and coherent English, so no need to worry about terribly quality of writing and just general grammar. I guess I'll give this review more of a pitch to hopefully hook you in; This story revolves around Sunny. A cold cynic that had been kicked down to the bottom rungs of society, facing and surviving the cruel reality of being outside the care of the system. Ultimately, Sunny never gets the privilege to desire; to do what he wants in the way he wants. Ultimately a slave to the system. But this all changes with his first nightmare. Expecting a death sentence, he faces the coming reality and succumbs to it. Alas, the spell is cruel with its sick mind games and Sunny comes to a new forceful realization and change of heart. Read along and see the progression of Sunny as he develops, matures and fights for what he so desires but not only that, read along to see the many other characters who are just as deep as Sunny. Oh yes, there's good humor too, more than once has this story made me chuckle and laugh at its humor. Bravo to this story for make me laugh, very few stories do that to me... Or maybe I'm truly screwed in the head and stuck in my own flaws as Sunny.🤷

TwinlyDidymus

1yr

Commented

It needs a name author 😡

"How about… Shameless? No? What about... Shady? Also no? Hm, what about something simpler, like… What? Well, do you have suggestions then? Alright, alright! We'll shelve this conversation for later."

TwinlyDidymus

1yr

Replied to Guiltythree

After going through tis Webnovel, you might've wanted to label it something else than shadow step 😅

With the added utility of Shadow Sight, Shadow Step and Shadow Scout, it was truly incredible.

"Only a boastful duelist like Leo Striker would claim to know his way around a sword. A true master, one who battles Nightmare Creatures in the Dream Realm instead of playing games with pampered Awakened in the Dreamscape, would know that they have infinitely more yet to learn than they already know. That's what Mongrel meant. No matter how good he is, he understands that in the grand scheme of things, his skill and power are like that of an infant."

Shadow Slave

Fantasy · Guiltythree

TwinlyDidymus

1yr

Commented

I feel like I heard this before

"But that's the thing, teacher Loran," Shang said. "As long as you are nearby, my mind won't be fully focused on the battle. As long as you are watching me, I will never feel in danger. If I don't get pushed to the limit, how can I find the inspiration I need?"

Sword God in a World of Magic

Fantasy · Warmaisach

TwinlyDidymus

1yr

Replied to JPNovelFan

Idk. The lore here feels very fleshed out. The mages literally genocided and and annihilated a cultural group and their teachings. Largely done by the Mage Emperor, and it's suggested that this is the most powerful mage to exist in all of history and I'm going to take the guess that none has reached his pinnacle since. Also the MC has been restricted from cultivating his body ever since he's arrived here, earlier, his cultivation technique was to overload his body with Mana then shatter his body so the overloaded Mana can actually be used on his body without destroying it, slowly giving him more power, rinse and repeat. Also also, from what we've seen, each Earthen Warrior has pioneer'd the next path to the cultivation stage. That's a significant amount of progress, especially since its likely that about 90% of humanity is below stage 6, and the warriors have fleshed out a path to stage 5, which the pioneer himself has admitted that a better path exists than the one he took which he is now researching into.

ch 162 Chapter 162 – Exploding Mountain Turtle

Sword God in a World of Magic

Fantasy · Warmaisach

TwinlyDidymus

1yr

Replied to MrShadowMan

That or the Duke, I think he technically owns it, I'd have to reread though

Mattheo's father had founded the Warrior's Academy?

Sword God in a World of Magic

Fantasy · Warmaisach

TwinlyDidymus

1yr

Commented

Honestly, with him being raised in earth, under the hands of a peaceful culture, I can kind of see how the immaturity is still there. Also it's possible that the age of his body also influences his mentality, but idk the science behind that.

But it actually wasn't so bad. After all, Shang was only fifteen years old or something like that. They all saw him as a kid, and such mistakes weren't as devastating as if an adult had committed them.

Sword God in a World of Magic

Fantasy · Warmaisach

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