Febfew - Profile

No

I use Google Translate so if you don't understand something, you can ask me and I'll explain or I'll try to express myself better.

Author, I recommend only 3 women as a limit. It will be extremely complicated for narrative and writing if you add more than that. In a harem with many women, it is common for several chapters to be off-screen, only occasionally shown as if it were an object. I humbly ask this, I know the narrative will get VERY complicated. I'm not commenting on this because I don't like the harem tag, but because it's a difficult tag to execute well in the script. The only chance for a harem with 5~10 girls to work is if you put slife of life to introduce them, otherwise they will have the same development and appearances as Max with double or triple the number of chapters since his introduction in the story.

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I'm saying that this fanfic was supposed to be your 5th success because the premise of 5 of your fanfics (including this one) are very good, but you poorly developed the plot of 4 of them and you're close to failing with this one too. And honestly it seems to me that you are making a mistake on purpose. I'm using google translator...

Author, please tell me the formula on how to consciously reject being in the top 30~50 fanfics with powers stones. You let the chance pass you by 4 times, 5 with this one.

Man, that was extremely forced, this plot is so pathetic that anyone with two brain cells knows the mistakes. Danzo showing mastery in Fuinjutsu greater than Mito and Kushina (two Uzumaki), and even the poisons he has are more lethal than Chiyo of Sunagakure. This is so absurdly pathetic that I have no words to describe it. If you did these things above to make things worse, it's a matter of time, so author, edit these chapters and eliminate this "plot". It doesn't make any sense, this plot is so bad that it's on the same level as a lazy Chinese party fanatic.

This story clearly has potential, but the author is into simple things. Excessive and annoying attention to details (many details are useless and only serve to fill the chapter), lack of knowledge of many things in the work (the most annoying being the Sharingan, something that allows for faster and broader evolution), the fights are poorly portrayed (sometimes it becomes irritating), even if it's an alternative universe the timeline has errors that make the plot confusing and it will get worse, when you explain something you end up using more or less the same words for different moments that should convey emotion ( friendship, etc. A single super annoying example is "crucible", it breaks the reading rhythm easily, it seems like the author is putting an AI to write in his place and failing miserably at it).

There is clearly an exaggeration of details by the author. Useless details, which are the worst kind of error for an author, so don't defend such nonsense.

Harém?

I think you can understand the general meaning of my text even using Google Translate. Basically all nations had losses in the third war, but Konoha had two disastrous massacres for its military capacity without any nation lifting a finger.

I hope this Hiruzen is 100% of the original, with the exception of the skills. In fact Hiruzen is so incompetent, Danzo so crazy and Itachi so blind that if it weren't for the script Konoha would have been eliminated with absolute certainty after the massacre of the Uchiha clan. The argument is very simple and logical: remember the succession of public displays of weakness and massive losses after Sakumo's suicide, the third war, the Hyuuga incident, and the massacre caused by the Kyuubi with the death of Minato and Kushina, now add the Uchiha massacre and Konoha is so weak that Iwa or Kumo can destroy it. And then comes the second point, most of these losses were caused without any of the other major nations losing anything or losing something insignificant (Hyuuga case). Because of minor things nations invade others in the real world, Kishimoto created a volcano in the script in favor of Konoha and even put some logic into this collective attitude so bizarre that the story involving the Uchiha.

It's pathetic to see people defending Tobirama and Hiruzen with a thousand useless arguments. Hashirama himself was against what Tobirama did regarding the police. And Hiruzen didn't do anything decent when Danzo tried to kill him after Minato's death. In fact Hiruzen was so incompetent, Danzo so crazy and Itachi so blind that if it weren't for the script Konoha would have been eliminated with absolute certainty after the massacre of the Uchiha clan. The argument is very simple and logical: remember the succession of public demonstrations of weakness and massive losses after Sakumo's suicide, the third war, Minato's death and the massacre caused by the Kyuubi, add the Uchiha massacre and Konoha is weaker than Iwa and Kumo. Because of minor things, nations invade others in the real world, Kishimoto created a volcano in the script in favor of Konoha and even put some logic into this bizarre and stupid collective attitude.

This fanfic is good, but it's almost 100% AU. Kurenai, Anko, Sakura, Temari, Madara's Mangekyou, Hashirama's cells, Hashirama himself, Uzumaki Mito. All of this is AU in this fanfic and most likely Itachi will be too. The MC's strength is also ridiculous, but the problem lies in the ease that the MC has with Fuinjutsu. And then comes the biggest problem of all: this fanfic will only end in about 5~10 years at this rate, if the author doesn't die or abandon it like he did with several fanfictions before this one.

Sorry man, but the original shows that Minato was a genius above Itachi. It shows that Minato participated in the Second Ninja War even though he was very young, implying that he graduated from the academy very early. And he likely lost his original genin teacher and team in that war, making Jiraya and the team shown in the anime (in a photo) as his second team.