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What if Petunia saw the truth—and chose to raise a warrior, not a victim? When Petunia Dursley puts bitterness aside and opens her eyes, Harry Potter grows up not in a cupboard, but with knowledge, power, and a healthy dose of skepticism. No blind loyalty. No hero worship. Just a boy raised to see through the lies. As another child takes the spotlight as the “Boy Who Lived,” Harry watches from the shadows—learning, planning, waiting. And when the time comes, he won’t follow the path laid out for him. Because this Harry doesn’t serve the greater good—he is the darkness that will swallow it.

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One day you get Isekai'd into the world of Arifureta with the power of the Witches of Sin from Re:Zero. ------ [First 12 chapters are very cringe so just bare with it or you can skip them] [Just to be clear this is not a story where 'Regulus’ takes the spotlight and outshines the Original MC, yea he will have his moments but it's mainly 'Regulus’ just tagging along as a Secondary MC, so don't expect him to lead the way or anything.] (I do not Own Arifureta / Re:Zero) (Story Belongs To: Aleiisekai (On Wattpad)) (I have permission to Repost and Edit this story)

The gate has opened in Ginza, leading to a bloody massacre and the rise of the Hero of Ginza? No! In a world which has a little more sense, Emperor Molt Sol Augustus send scouts, and the following events might change his mind on the course of action!

A common shut-in and somewhat perverted weeb woke up as Kousuke Endou on the summoning of the 'heroes' from Earth in the world of Tortus. What would he do next? Read and find out! --- -- - Writer's Greetings: Welcome to my first voyage into the abyssal sea of fan fiction! This fan fiction is a commonplace 'power-fantasy,' 'wish-fulfillment,' 'another-world (isekai)' fanfiction. So, expect the tropes and clichés frequently used in this kind of work. They'll probably appear here. This fanfic will contain a harem. However, the harem's dynamic will be somewhat complex. You may or may not like it. I'm not sure. On top of that, MC won't be a perfect guy with a perfect personality. He will have a severe character flaw (Luxuria). You may or may not like the MC due to it. If you don't like him, I won't begrudge you. Just don't start flaming pointlessly! By the way, be ready for some silly, cringe, chuuni stuff here! Moving to the next topic, I'm writing this fanfic on my Android. I apologize in advance if you find any mistakes. English isn't my native language, so I'm not an expert. Still, I'll try to present something adequate. By the way, each chapter contains a minimum of about 1.5k words. The narrative will be in the third-person's point of view. About the posting schedule, I can't promise anything because I don't know what will happen on IRL. However, I will try to post a new chapter every day, or once every two days at the latest. With that all written above, Writer's Greetings is over, so happy reading! Sincerely, Common Weeb

Preface Welcome to Waterford: Where Common Sense Is Rare, But Condiments Are Plentiful If you’ve never been to Waterford, California, prepare yourself for a place unlike any other. Nestled somewhere between “Why is this happening?” and “Did that just happen?”, Waterford is a town where the cows outnumber the people, the local diner’s “mystery meatloaf” has been known to cause spontaneous philosophical debates, and the most popular radio station is literally just a guy with a bullhorn standing on Main Street shouting the weather forecast. It’s a town where logic goes to take a vacation and never quite returns. And yet, it’s the perfect place for a common sense revolution. Because in Waterford, absurdity isn’t just a way of life—it’s practically a civic duty. Enter our hero: Colonel Mustard. No, not the stuff you find hiding in the back of your fridge, but a condiment with a mission and a military hat that’s seen more action than the town’s annual zucchini festival. Colonel Mustard is a saucy sage, a sharp-witted warrior against idiocy, and the only thing standing between Waterford and complete chaos. With a penchant for delivering clues that are as obvious as they are hilarious, he’s here to spread common sense thick and tangy—because sometimes, the world just needs a little more flavor. But every hero needs a sidekick, and Colonel Mustard’s is none other than Lieutenant Pickle. Lieutenant Pickle is a bit salty, a little sour, and always ready with a pun that’s guaranteed to make you groan and laugh simultaneously. Sporting a tiny military hat perched atop his wrinkled green head and a monocle that screams “I’m serious, but also kind of ridiculous,” Pickle is the yin to Mustard’s yang. Together, they’re the dynamic duo Waterford never knew it needed but can’t live without—especially since Pickle has a habit of misunderstanding Colonel Mustard’s clues in the most delightfully disastrous ways. Of course, no quest for common sense would be complete without a few wild cards. Enter Pelosi with the Clues—Waterford’s unofficial riddle master, part-time “Clue Crew” leader, and the only person who seems to understand the mysterious disappearance of the BJ’s at the BK Lounge. Pelosi is a walking enigma wrapped in sarcasm, armed with cryptic hints that make you scratch your head and chuckle at the same time. She’s the one who keeps the town guessing, the conspiracy theories alive, and the condiment cartel cats perpetually on edge. Speaking of which, the cartel cats are another running gag you’ll want to keep an eye on. These shadowy felines are rumored to be masterminding elaborate condiment heists, swapping secret sauces, and generally making life difficult for anyone trying to keep Waterford sane. They slink through alleyways, their whiskers twitching with mischief, always one step ahead of the law—and Colonel Mustard’s sharp tongue. And then there’s the BK Lounge, the town’s infamous hotspot where the BJ’s have mysteriously vanished. Is it a conspiracy? A bureaucratic blunder? Or just another example of Waterford’s asa backwards logic? No one knows for sure, but it’s a mystery that haunts the town like a bad hangover after a night of drinking Dane Cook’s legendary comedy specials (which, by the way, everyone agrees are amazing—even if no one can quite explain why). In Waterford, logic often takes a backseat to absurdity, and the hotline for help is stuck on an endless loop of hold music that sounds suspiciously like a kazoo orchestra. Bureaucracy reigns supreme, common sense is a rare delicacy, and the only thing more confusing than the town’s power structure is the local government’s attempt to ban sarcasm (spoiler: it didn’t work). But fear not! Whenever idiocracy rears its ridiculous head, Colonel Mustard and his crew are ready to serve up a fresh batch of common sense—with a side of parody songs, running gags, and enough laughter to make even the most hardened bureaucrat hang up and dance.