funny jokes irish

There's one about an Irish leprechaun who keeps losing his pot of gold and it's hilarious!

A priest in Ireland was driving down a country road when a policeman stopped him. The priest asked, 'Is there a problem, officer?' The policeman replied, 'You were speeding, Father.' The priest said, 'Oh, forgive me, I was daydreaming about my sermon.' The policeman said, 'Well, I'll let you off with a warning, but next time, slow down.' The priest drove off slowly. A few miles down the road, the policeman saw the priest's car pulled over. He walked up and asked, 'Is there a problem, Father?' The priest said, 'I'm not sure, I just stopped to give this rosary a speeding ticket.' This is a funny play on the priest's piety and the situation of getting a speeding ticket.

Here's an Irish joke. Paddy goes to the doctor and says, 'Doctor, I keep getting this pain in me eye when I drink tea.' The doctor says, 'Take the spoon out of the mug before you drink.' Another story could be about an Irish leprechaun who was always up to mischief in the village. He would move things around and make the villagers think they were going crazy. One day, a young lad caught him in the act and they became friends, and the leprechaun started using his magic for good, like making the crops grow better.

Of course, I can collect some funny stories and jokes for you. Here are some examples: 1 A man went to the movies and realized he had watched too much, so he said,"I can tell this movie is so bad." Another said,"No, you just heard all the rhythms." 2 A man said to his girlfriend,"I like you a little." His girlfriend said,"So much?" I don't have any." The man said,"No, I just like your smile." 3 A man asked his girlfriend,"You have a little blue eyes." His girlfriend said,"Yes, I ordered blue glasses." The man said,"No, I'm just saying that I have blue eyes and you have blue glasses." 4 When a man heard that he often chatted with a young man, he said,"I think the coolest thing about young people is that they are a little fat." The subject said," No, the coolest thing is to experience some surprises." The guy said," No, you're not as cool as me. I've been through some of the coolest things, like being thought of as a princess." A man asked his girlfriend,"What do you like about me?" His girlfriend said,"I like the way you talk to me." The man said,"No, what I like is that you can understand me." I hope these jokes can help you satisfy your needs!

Here's one. An Irishman walks out of a bar. Yes, that's the whole joke. It plays on the expectation that there should be more to the story but the simplicity of it is the humor.

Joke: An Irishman is walking along the beach when he finds a magic lamp. He rubs it and a genie pops out. The genie says he'll grant the Irishman one wish. The Irishman says, 'I'm a bit lonely, can you make everyone in Ireland like me?' The genie snaps his fingers and says, 'Done!' The Irishman looks around and says, 'Who the hell are you?' Story: In a small Irish village, there was a pub where all the locals would gather. One night, a stranger came in and started boasting about how he could out - drink anyone in the village. An old Irishman took up the challenge. After many pints, the stranger passed out and the old Irishman just laughed and said, 'You should know not to challenge an Irishman in his own pub!'

They make us laugh! Simple as that. The humor in them just hits the right spot and lightens the mood.

The following were all funny jokes: A bird flew into an orchard and saw a sheep lying on the ground, so he asked the sheep,"why are you lying here?" "I'll wait for the apples," answered the sheep."They haven't fallen yet." The bird asked,"Why don't you bite the grass?" The sheep replied,"I'd better wait for the apples to fall. They're much tastier than grass!" 2 went to a bar alone and got drunk. His friend was very worried about him and decided to help him go home. When they arrived at his house, his friends tried to help him to the door, but the man kept crying,"Don't take me back to the zoo!" "Why are you going to the zoo?" His friend asked in surprise. The man replied,"Didn't I tell you? I'm dead drunk. You take him back to the zoo so I can go see lions and tigers!" A man was trapped on an island. He caught a bird and a rabbit and prepared to cook them into a delicious meal. He asked the rabbit,"What do you want to eat?" "I want to eat carrots," the rabbit replied. He asked the bird,"What do you want to eat?" The bird replied,"I want to eat rabbits." The man immediately let go of the rabbit and the bird flew away. The man was very angry and asked the rabbit,"why did you fly away?" The rabbit replied,"I wanted to eat carrots, so I went to look for it."

Another joke. What's an IT expert's favorite place? The space bar. Because it's always so spaced out.

Here's a joke. Two gay men were arguing about who was the better cook. One said, 'I can make the most amazing soufflé.' The other replied, 'Well, I can make a quiche that'll make you forget all about soufflés!' And they both ended up laughing and cooking together.