Chapter 55: The Devil's Crowning Glory - Part III
20th March
Diana, Artemis, State of Luna
Why are we here? I don't understand. Everything about this, no longer makes sense to me. Was I stupid for ever thinking there was even a chance that I could beat Frank? He's always been too far ahead, able to see further ahead. It should've been obvious that I couldn't make this work.
"Why are we here?"
I look up. Sitting across from me at a table is Akira. I'm not entirely sure what happened, I don't remember it that clearly myself. After what Frank said, I think I must've left, ran away from his house. Thinking that if I could just get away, with Akira, then none of it would matter. That it'd be fine. I'd be forgiven for it all, and we could escape from Frank. It might seem strange that I could drag Akira here, considering he's taller than me, but Lunarians are all weak. Even I, who has lived on the moon for longer, and lost more muscle density than any other human, can still drag him around. He is only a child after all. So now, the two of us are sitting in a café, across from each other at a table.
I realise now that it was probably all pointless. It feels like it was meaningless. What I did just now, and trying to beat Frank. It didn't mean anything. It was an impossibility, something that was just never going to happen. There was no way we were ever going to be successful in the first place. I think I misjudged both Frank and myself. That was the problem.
"Um… what… what do you think of your father?"
"My father is my father."
Akira answers in a way that only he, and perhaps Yohn, would answer, but looks at me blankly like this is the only possible answer. I sigh. Sometimes talking with Yohn was incredibly frustrating because of this. What exactly did I ever see in that man?
"I meant, do you like or dislike your father?"
"Well, he's my father," Akira says, "I don't think it's that simple."
I'm about to sigh again, but then I realise that I would probably say the same thing about my parents. Though I don't know if I would've been able to understand it that well when I was Akira's age. I sit in silence as I think about what Akira said. Yes, I suppose it isn't that simple.
After a while Akira speaks up, "are you my mother?"
I lean back, and stare wide eyed in shock. Before I can think about it, I instinctively go to say yes, but I stop myself. No, I can't. I don't have the right to do that.
"What makes you think that?" is how I reply instead.
"I know my parents were both part of the first twenty."
I see. I thought for a moment that he knew I was his mother, but he just thought it was possible. He does know who I am though. Who am I kidding? Everyone on the moon recognises my face, in fact there's quite a few people looking in our direction just here in the café. I wish they'd all just go away.
What would happen if I did say that I tell him I was his mother? What would we do? Should I run away, and find some way to hide from Frank. If Akira was with me, do I think I could do it? Would that even work? If it could, then I think I could forgive myself for leaving Nozomi and the rest behind. I could live on, even if I sacrificed the rest of them, right? Mothers are supposed to do anything for their children, or so I've heard.
"Let's pretend… if you did meet your mother, would you want to go live with her instead?"
Akira regards me coolly, as he considers it in his head. He seems mature for his age, but somehow that's unsurprising. I guess that's what you would expect from someone with Yohn's genes, and brought up by Frank.
"If she was a good mother. I'd have to ask father first. Otherwise he would find us?"
"He would find us? Without a doubt?"
"On the moon. Father can find anything on the moon."
On the moon. That's right, me and Akira can't run. Our weakened bodies shackle us to this rock. And Frank owns this rock. The man in the moon. Where could we hide that he couldn't find us? He told me when he explained how he knew about the plot to assassinate him: he was having us followed, tapping into our phone calls. There's probably secret cameras and wiretaps all over the moon as well. How could we possibly stay hidden from all that for any length of time? In fact, he probably knows exactly where we are right now. Maybe that's the only reason we haven't been caught yet. Because he doesn't have to. We're already in the spider's web. It was something that should've been so simple for me to see that even a child could understand it.
Akira opens his mouth, "are you my m-"
"No, I'm not your mother," I reply, "I'm no one's mother. And I wouldn't be a good mother. Come on, I'll take you back home."
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