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Chapter 6: Soon

Laying in blinding darkness,

Waiting for eternal sleep to overcome me-in my already half-dead state.

Laying on a pitch black field,

Surrounded by something called family.

Waiting for death to come-amazingly only simply waiting.

SOON

Laying with opened blind eyes.

SOON

Rising and falling down. Falling down and rising.

SOON

Standing with closed bright eyes.

SOON

SOON

SOON

The end is to reach its final stage soon.

Soon.

Here I am.

Laying and waiting. Lying and waiting. Lying and fighting. Always lying and fighting.

Death, Illness, Pain.

This world, its inhabitants, everything. Life.

It will be over soon.

Soon.

SOON

I can feel it in my aching bones.

I can almost hear your intoxicating voice. How charming you are.

I can kiss your soulless lips any time soon.

SOON

Soon enough. Too early. Too late actually.

Soon.

I have been doing the same thing all over.

Fighting and lying. Lying and waiting. Waiting and laying. Always laying and waiting.

Without a moment's pause, rest or time.

No matter with whom I was, with what I was with, with no one.

Soon.

SOON

Soon enough. No. Too slow. Too fast- truth to be told.

Soon.

Lie. It´s a lie. Liar, I´m liar. Yeah, a fucking lying liar. I´m so sorry.

I´m not ready yet but I still know:

My end is almost here.

Hang on a little while longer my crazy fucked up mind.

Please hang on a bit longer my weakened strength less body.

Fuck it! Hang on, the fuck! Why you always betray me in the end?

Soon.

Everything will end soon.

I will tear apart my fear, tore my pride to shreds, smash my dreams and dissect my soul for you.

Oh death, how enchanting you are!

SOON

Wait for me. Welcome me. Soothe me.

Ease me. Help me. Take me.

Save me.

SOON

It´s a promise, between you and me.

Our little secret, hidden from this world.

An unbreakable bond everyone has but still a different one to each individual.

Soon, I´ll come. I swear.

Please don´t abandon me. I hope to find a place in your fair arms, which accept everyone regardless of who they are. Don´t disappoint me.

I just wanna rest in peace forever. Away from everything that mattered and everyone who were important to me. I don´t need it anymore. It´s too tiring to live any longer.

So my dear grim riper, I´ll be forever waiting. Take me soon.

Soon.


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