Chapter 57: Chapter 57: Bittersweet Love
"What do you think I have cared about most during your time with me?" I pondered over it, as a man he was successful, had many things, including money, career, respect. But he seemed to care little about them.
"Emotions," I answered.
It seemed that I didn't disappoint him, as he revealed a hint of a smile, and looked at the waiter pouring wine for him. "What do you think is the most intolerable thing in a relationship?" he said, his eyes still fixed on the red wine. His expression grew gloomy under the light. Before I responded, he had given me the answer, "It is cheating!"
I looked down uneasily, and the crab's hardshell hurt my hands. He went on, "We can be betrayed at any moment on the streets, so we value trust and loyalty the most! The reason Troy and I remain in a relationship is the trust between us."
"But what did he mean? Was it because of my explanation about the knife in the morning, or something else?" I thought. My blood was surging, and the terror constrained every vein as if I had fallen into an immense abyss, totally losing myself.
I didn't know how long it took me to calm down. After a while, I guessed that he couldn't have known what I wanted to do, or he would not have spoken to me in such a calm voice.
I observed his expression and asked tentatively, "You said you trusted me the most, would you be angry if I lied to you? Would you forgive me?" His eyes moved to my face as if they could pierce my body and my soul. I ducked in a bit of panic.
"Desiree," he said and took the crab from my hands and pinched my swollen red fingers. "I love you! No matter how you have cheated me before, I can forgive you. But from now on, if you cheat on me again, I will never forgive you!"
"Had he already known my thoughts, hoping for me to confess to obtaining his trust? Or perhaps he didn't intend to investigate it secretly, hoping that I would confess?" all these possibilities went through my mind.
It was the most difficult choice of my life: If I confessed, it meant that I would have to give up my last chance of having revenge. Or if I didn't, it meant that I would lose the last chance to love him.
The choice between irreconcilable hatred and overwhelming love was confusing me.
"I... " he interrupted me. I almost couldn't think about anything calmly. What I needed was to calm down. Distracted, I suddenly saw the piano in the middle of the restaurant. Then I immediately said, "Since you haven't heard me play for a long time, let me perform one piece of my favorite song for you."
He looked at me in silence. I pretended not to see his disappointment and walked towards the white piano. When the music began, I could see him frowning. Yes, anyone would have mixed feelings when hearing the song 'Butterfly'.
During the first half of the song, many sweet memories were emerging in my brain like old black and white movies. I smiled at him, and he returned the smile, even though it was emotionless.
Once I got into it, the whole restaurant became quiet and my tears fell on the undulating keys. The music trembled with my trembling fingers and became more dismal. I struggled to turn to him with a smile. He was expertly lifting the shell of the crab and putting the flesh on my plate. My world was turned upside down at that moment, and all reason was gone!
We made eye contact under the brilliant, maroon light. The moment we stared at each other seemed like an eternity. Along with the music, I said slowly, "I met a man I shouldn't have met, and I fell in love with him when I shouldn't have. No matter how our story will go, I will be lucky to reencounter him. Because he is the most perfect man in the world, no matter what others think of him. Nobody compares to him!"
Amidst the polite applause, I stood up and closed the piano slowly, then stroked my hand along its surface as I walked away. When Jonathan stood up, I couldn't tell if it was joy or sorrow in his eyes.
I walked up to him and hugged him. It was also a kind of happiness that made life seem like a transient flower. "Desiree, you are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen," he said.
"Jonathan, I promise you that I will not deceive you from now on," I said because I knew that's what he expected!
I didn't know what would happen in the future, but at least I had shown my most graceful moment to him! I had experienced enchanted, bittersweet love.
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