Chapter 3: Goodbye Rupert
By: Carolina Morales
Aug.20,1989
Dear Diary,
Hello. I'm Michelle. It is my thirteenth birthday. I am finally in eighth grade. I am one of the big kids. I don't really know what to write about… SO I am going to tell you some things about myself. I live with my mom, dad, and little sister and brother (they're twins and they're only 5 years old). I don't really have friends because the school sees me as a freak. See, I am the tallest girl in the school and I'm taller than most guys (I am 6 '1). My body is also a lot more developed than the girls in my classes. The kids make fun of me all the time. It is hard going to school and seeing all the kids that despise me because of how I look. BUT! Now I have you and you're going to be my best friend in the entire world. I must go now because mother and father want to go and cut my birthday cake! Goodbye!
Aug. 24,1989
Dear Diary,
Hi! It's Michelle again. I am SO SORRY for not writing for 4 whole days! I was super busy with schoolwork! But something really exciting happened yesterday. There is a new kid at school! So far, they have hung out with Jessica, Paula, and Trinity (the snotty popular kids, basically, the real-life version of the Heathers). But she said HI to me! She LOOKED at me and spoke and they seemed so nice! I want to talk to them again. But like…actually have a conversation. This has made me so happy diary- which I now just noticed… I can't keep calling you diary; I'm gonna call you Rupert. So, as I was saying, Rupert, this made me soo happy! Someone, for the first time in years, that isn't related to me; spoke to me. Ah! I must go again but I promise you will hear from me again!
Aug. 25, 1989
Dear Diary,
OH MY GOD. Rupert! *whispers* I made a friend! They told me that they're name is 'Jack'. They sat down at the table I usually sit at for lunch. They said I looked lonely and that they wanted to be my friend! Can you believe that Rupert!?! Jack said that they wanted to be my friend. Today was literally so perfect! I can't wait for the many adventures that Jack and I will have. AHH! I'm sooooo excited! I now have two friends, you and Jack. Okay… Okay… I must go once more. But trust me I will DEFINITELY be back.
Oct. 4,1989
Dear Diary,
Rupert. I must apologize. I am truly truly sorry. I have not intentionally ignored you. It's just that… I've been hanging out with Jack these past two months. It feels so amazing and liberating to be friends with an actual human being. Someone that truly cares for you. I think… I think I might have a best friend Rupert. Rupert, please don't take this the wrong way. I truly never meant to hurt you. I once again must sadly go. I will be back Rupert. I will never forget about you. You were/are my first friend. You will always and forever have a special place in my heart. Until the next time my friend. Peace!
Dec. 31, 1989
Dear Diary,
Oh gosh Rupert. SO much has happened. But before I tell you anything. HAPPY NEW YEARS EVE! I am currently at Jack's house because his parents are throwing this HUGE party and Jack didn't want to be lonely. Rupert over the past couple months I have been conflicted. I have this weird feeling that I have never known or felt. I believe that I am sick from sort of disease that affects the brain. I mean that is the only possible explanation for what is happening to me. These symptoms are unheard of. Every time that I am with Jack, I get really hot. I get really nervous and every time I think about them there is this strange feeling in my abdomen. It truly is a mystery. I should ask mother if I am dying. Oh gee. I must go Rupert; Jack is calling for me. Goodbye my dear friend.
Jan. 3, 1990
Dear Diary,
I have no words. Something terrible has happened. Horrendous. There are no words to explain how disastrous this situation has become. I spoke to mother about my illness. And she simply laughed. She said that what I was describing was the feeling of liking someone. And then… the worst part happened. She asked me to whom my feelings belonged. And I shyly responded, "Jack." That's when my mother began to yell, "JACK?!?" "I FORBID YOU TO EVEN SPEAK TO THAT CHILD. YOU ARE TO NEVER SEE OR SPEAK TO 'JACK' EVER AGAIN! DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME!" She sighed, and then grabbed my head and said, with tears in her eyes, "My child. My young, sweet, and ignorant child. I take back what I said. What you are feeling is the Devil trying to corrupt your mind. You simply cannot have feelings for Jack because it is a sin. God will never love you if you act upon these thoughts. Promise me that you will never speak to Jack ever again." Oh Rupert! This is horrible. I don't understand. Why would God punish me for having a crush on Jack? I cannot believe what mother is saying. I REFUSE to believe it. I must go again Rupert but please know two things: 1. I will be back again. 2. I WILL continue to speak to Jack; no matter what mother says.
Feb. 11, 1990
Dear Diary,
I am in love. It is so simple. I now truly understand what love is. Jessica and the others tried to harass me today, but Jack bravely got in their way and scared them off. Jack is my hero. I have come to understand my feelings and I was so silly to ever think it was a disease. Jack is my one true love. Oh, yeah and mother still does not know that I have continued to speak to Jack. Goodbye Rupert, mwah mwah.
Feb. 14, 1990
Dear Diary,
Whew. Um. Rupert. I am truly sad. But now I know what mother has meant by Sin. Jack, or as I should say Jacqueline, is a female as am I. Obviously… I already knew that. But the thing I did not know is that Girls CANNOT date Girls. I am truly disappointed. My feelings for her are still true and valid. But I don't want to scare her off by admitting my sins. I don't even know if she'll feel the same way. I should've listened to mother and ended things before they escalated. But Rupert, I DO love her. Why must life be so unfair. I must go and wallow in my despair. Goodbye.
Aug. 20, 1990
Dear Diary,
It's once again my birthday. I am fourteen. I am now in high school. And you'll never believe what happened over the summer. My mother sent me away to summer camp to be as far away as possible from Jack. BUT! Jack came without anyone knowing. She would sneak into my cabin every now and then and we'd talk for hours. Oh, how wonderful it was. My feelings for her are as strong as ever. What am I to do Rupert? PFFT. I must go again but I will be in touch.
Oct. 3,1990
Dear Diary,
RUPERT! Jack… has… kissed… me. She said she had feelings for me. I cannot believe it. I am truly happy. For now, we must keep it a secret. Jack and I have decided to become girlfriends. This is the happiest day of my life (aside from when I got you Rupert). Although, Rupert. With my happiness also comes tragedy. I must say goodbye to you. I don't know how long I'll be gone… I don't know if I'll ever be back. But I want you to know that YOU were my first friend. Before Jack… before anybody. You were and will always be my first friend and for that I thank you. Goodbye old friend.
June 26,2015
Hello. It has truly been a long time my dear old friend. I am thirty-nine years old now. But it is still the same Michelle that you once knew all those years ago. We have so much to catch up on my dear old Rupert. The first thing I must say is that I graduated high school (ugh that infernal place) and I have my masters in psychology. I am a therapist that helps LGBTQ+ kids with any problems they may have. Jack and I are also still together. We got "married" a few years back. But since same sex marriage is now legal; we have decided to get married again and make it official this time. We have 3 beautiful children. I named my eldest son Rupert, after you. Then we have Lisa, our little tinkerer. And finally, we have Charlotte, the drama queen of the house. Thank you for being my friend all those years ago. Without you I know I would have lost my mind. But you were always there even when I wasn't there for you. I now have a family that loves and accepts me, and I live in a world were people are more and more accepting with each passing day. Now, this is truly our last goodbye. I love you Rupert. Thank you and goodbye.
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OverLordGold
OverLordGold This short-story was written by Carolina Morales a fellow friend of mine.
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