Chapter 9: Cheeseburger
"I want cheeseburger T_T" cries an author instead of updating.
Maybe the author does some sit ups or something to be good and curve the hunger pangs. Who feels hunger when your core hurts? Maybe there's the protein in the cabinet. Dude if a quarantine hits and you got a stock of protein milk it's not too bad? But CC is cursed with something greater than herself and the urge to write.
She is cursed with munchies.
"Cheeeeeeese burger Σ_(꒪ཀ꒪」∠)_" rolls CC, stuck on the floor, from food-induced sadness and maybe because her upper body strength sucks.
"Sinner" denounced the hamster from above.
Humans are not very cute when they exercise. Not like fluffy fat hamsters. Hoooomans are not so cute without the soft floofs to cover their red skin and ugly suffering.
"I wwwwaaaaaant but I didn't! Cravings are hard!" cries CC, defending herself as she's forced to at least plank.
"You want but why? What started this cheesey burger craving?"
It was not the Spanish inquisition but the hamster whipped and tortured its human anyways, with a role dup newspaper of course. Because it can't hold anything else in its tiny paws. Phew, we not getting dangerous or kinky in this. It still hurt though, right to the head.
"Why!" questioned the hamster, the truth for the human threatening to spill forth. That and a burp.
"Because....because...."
"Because of what!? Admit it!"
"Luuuuuuuukkkkkkaaaaaassssssssss ‧º·(˚ ˃̣̣̥⌓˂̣̣̥ )‧º·˚ " wails the author, guilt and tears in her eyes.
"Once again you blame a fictional character of your own creations for your unreasonable hunger." the hamster judged.
"It's all Lukas' fault! The kid just makes me hungry all the damn time. From pork belly to cheese burgers, anything with him makes me hungry."
"....."
"YOU CAN'T DENY THAT KID JUST MAKES YOU HUNGRY!"
Mr. Hamster could not deny that at all. Rather thinking about this particular mochi made him want to eat, by eat I mean abuse. For the hamster is violently ebil. Like an ebil gerbal, but a hamster. EBIL I SAY.
And so the overworked office slave unfortunetely gained weight these past 2 weeks. PArt of Covid-19, part from meal tickets at the hospital, and just general lack of exercise. YOu know why? BECAUSE YOU DON'T LOSE WEIGHT FROM BEING AN OFFICE SLAVE.
Curse fictional characters and their food preferences.
"But did it have to be a cheesey cheese burger?" munches the hamster, eating take out for the 3rd time this week.
"Yes." replied CC, already craving something else.
"YOu know.....there are readers talking." pointed out the hamster.
CC did not understand the big deal. She loves readers talking. Please talk to the author. Please leave all thoughts and comments bc she needs a life outside working the frontline and all her friends are bored/cooped up. Except her best friend but that friend is also swamped with work. Gosh darn it who knew game programmers were being put on overtime during Covid-19 lockdown? It's not just office slaves.
"I like them talking."
"No no no they're not talking about fun and praising you!"
"Awww....are they talking history?"
"Ships.
"Oh...sweet."
"No no no not sweet THEY TALKING BABY SHIPS."
"NOT THE BABIES!"
"YES THE BABIES!!!"
CC and the hamster have mixed feelings on baby ships, for they are babies. TAlking about it is fune, for it is so cute. Oh so very cute and it makes hamster and human hearts go doki doki. BUT it can't get weird or smexy bc babies. Really, it depends.
"But why!?"
"Because of your cheeseburger craving!!!"
"Whaaaaaat?"
"Yesssssss."
CC stared at her burger, cheese and all. She shared at it long and hard, before taking a sinful messy bite.
"Are you saying ppl are shipping Lilyanne already?"
"It's the cheese."
CC took another bite, contemplating it. Then decided to nope.
"Cheeseburgers are delicious but not every day."
Once again the writer does not do enough writing. But she got a burger. She just doesn't want to eat it every day. Nor will she write about it all that often. For it will not happen. Shame. Oh well.
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