Chapter 3: Communication Without the "Mis"
You've probably read everywhere that good communication is basically the most important thing in a marriage and you're precisely right. In a marriage, it's easy to have miscommunication and tension from that. Conflict and even disagreements are often the results of misunderstanding and miscommunication. It can be a relief to know that it's not usually a conflict as much as it is a failure to properly transmit information. Grant it, when there is an actual disagreement, please go through it well and not spew fighting words.
People communicate differently and paying attention to how your partner communicates is key. To break down uniqueness, first is the difference of male and female. They tend to ask questions, present information, and express similar to their gender. I say tend to because there is a spectrum. I personally tend to act more on the masculine side of feminine and my husband is more sensitive than how men are traditionally portrayed.
Further on is how one was raised. For example, I was raised in a more reserved family where if we were upset, we didn't express it as much and tension just hung in the air. From someone from a confrontational family, this can definitely cause miscommunication for both. Learning more about your spouse's background can be very beneficial to understanding how they communicate.
Finally there is personal preference. Everyone has their own unique way they view the world and communicate. I would encourage you to ask questions about how they view actions/tones/etc. see if you can learn better what to say and avoid phrases etc that come across differently that you might think. It's an adjustment. It's important to give you and your spouse plenty of grace. This goes for the start of marriage or several years down the road. People are always shifting and so does their communication.
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