Chapter 37: Dinner & Diatribes (1)
-6:44 PM-
(Konoha Orphanage)
I had a strange feeling in the pit of my stomach, like when you were swimming and you wanted to put your feet down on something solid, but the water turned out to be deeper than you thought and there was nothing there.
Irrational fear and panic started creeping in, making my limbs feel sluggish. It was like black water, as cold as ice, settled in where my blood and marrow used to be, pushing every other feeling out as it filled me from my feet to my scalp with dread.
"Hideyo-chan, would you please quit being an eyesore? I'm trying to read here."
My feet came to a halt, my reddening thumb slid from between my teeth as I tried to regain my bearing.
I looked around and shot the boy with a look of disbelief. "I am literally standing outside of your field of vision, Sasuke, in silence."
Sasuke took his eyes off of a well-worn fire techniques scroll that Mom had promised to teach him over the weekend. He had been obsessively devouring it during the last few days. "If you look around, little brother, you'll see that you're scaring the animals away with your chakra. Calm down before you accidentally set things on fire."
"That's preposterous. I have a much better self control than that, mind you."
"Uh-uh, and I hate tomatoes."
"I hate you."
Sasuke smirked. "Please, you adore me. You picked me over Aniki, you can't take that back," he said smugly, to which I merely rolled my eyes. "You're just grumpy because Mother isn't here to baby you," Sasuke added.
"I don't need babying—"
"I mean, don't you have other things to do, Brother? Open up your presents, play with other kids and water your plant or something. There is absolutely nothing for you to be worried about. Mother is a jōnin and Father is a clan head, they are more than capable of protecting themselves. Besides, clan meetings usually do take hours to finish, your worrying would not make the time go any faster."
I sighed, equally exasperated. "I would if I could, Sasuke. Today is particularly terrible and I'm not sure why. I have a nasty headache, I feel nauseous," I patted my chest, "palpitation, chest pain... Why wouldn't anyone want those?" I asked sarcastically.
Dropping his scroll into his bag, Sasuke leaned down and enveloped me in a warm hug. "Sorry," he muttered.
The boy made a face when I blew my nose against the fabric on his shoulder, casting a wet splotch on the pristine shirt. "Now we're even."
Sasuke pinched my cheeks in exasperation and pushed me towards my birthday presents. The piles had decreased significantly because I had donated toys, story books, art supplies, and other useless knick knacks from my distant relatives to the orphans. I only kept some of the more practical things for myself. All of them were now stored inside a small scroll in my pocket.
I wrestled out of Sasuke's grip and waved at some of the older kids that had appeared by the gate, beckoning them closer.
Sasuke picked a nearby plastic knife and began cutting three slices of cake. "I'm not trying to be mean here, but at this rate there will be no more gifts left for you, Hideyo."
I flashed him a knowing smirk. "It's fine, Sasuke. It's not like I even need most of this stuff, among other things. And those three work part times in the market district. We never knew when we might need some discounts. Quid pro quo, ya know."
Sasuke smiled politely as he gave the teens their cakes. I myself ended up giving each of them a chocolate bar — the expensive ones that were imported from the capital if the wrapping papers were to be trusted.
Sasuke turned to me once they were out of the earshot, an ugly scowl etched on his face. "Let me rephrase that. I don't get why you're being so generous when they treat you with indifference. None of them have asked you to play with them or tried to comfort you when you clearly are in distress. It makes me wonder why you like staying in this place so much, especially since the primary reason our parents send you here is so that you could socialize with kids your age."
I climbed and plopped onto the table. I nudged Shinju away when it tried to snag my ankle from beneath the tablecloth. "Was that what Father and Mother told you?"
Sasuke gave me a look.
"In my defense, you do have a tendency to put your chosen authority figures on a pedestal."
"I don't—" I raised my brow, "alright, I do. But that's exactly why I asked. You're not a sociable child, fine. You cause some troubles here and there, fine too, everyone messes up sometimes. But sending you to an orphanage — only retrieving you in the evening, knowing full well that you will end up sleeping until the very next day, and then sending you away again in the morning? It's just… I don't know. It's almost like you're being thrown away, like you're not part of the family anymore."
Oh, wow.
I grabbed a hold of Sasuke's hands and gave them a firm squeeze, halting further rant.
"That's… that's one radical way to interpret it, Brother."
Sasuke's dark eyes bored into mine. "Tell me that I'm wrong then."
To be honest I had almost forgotten the last time I had a genuine conversation with anyone. I didn't really talk with Mikoto or Fugaku, but they were more or less satisfied that I didn't stir any more troublesome incidents. Itachi treated me like a child — one who was a danger to the society — and always emphasized the need for self control within my every action. Kabuto was more laid back in that regard, preferring to bond over our shared enthusiasm in science whenever we correspond through letters.
Here in the orphanage I could observe how Mother Nonō performed medical techniques and treated injured shinobi for extra money. The matron would treat civilians too, usually those from the lower class for free. She also allowed me to rummage through her books and scrolls once it became apparent that I was actually already literate, no question asked. The absence of ANBU guards was, of course, the cherry on top.
Weekly Power Status
-- Power
Ranking 
-- Power
stone