Chapter 8: An Elven Secret
He glanced sidelong at the beautiful woman beside him, just a hint of his complaint in his features. "I realized that's a childish question," he interrupted as she opened her mouth to speak, "And I understand that you might not even know how to answer it. I also understand that we can't really speak right here. I know all of this... But even so, I... I...!"
"It's okay," her musical voice informed him without the slightest hint of a smile. She looked at him seriously, "I know you know what you know, even if you're wrong. Probably. Humans sure do love that word. Why... Well, /why/ don't we have some tea and talk a little bit. Perhaps we can get you an answer or two?"
"What?" he asked, looking around. They were still in the same forest, though there was a large tree in the center of a small meadow, here. "A little picnic under the tree? I feel like the people I'm with will find me, though."
"Picnic? Ah, I'm not familiar with the word, but you seem to be slightly mistaken about something," she said, still serious as she pulled him toward the tree. "I wasn't planning to talk to you under him," she said, emphasizing that word other. "Rather..." She pushed him, hard, against the tree, then leaned her full weight against him, "Rather, we'll talk inside of him." And then she kissed him. It wasn't a friendly little kiss on the cheek, either, and the stunned boy was so surprised he didn't think to fight it until it was too late...
He finally thought to pull away from her, taking a few steps backward. "Oi! What's the meaning of this, you? I mean, it's not that I mind.... you're really, really, really pretty and all, but shouldn't you... I dunno, buy me dinner before stealing my first kiss as you please?"
"Eh? First? Isn't that human girl your lover?"
"What, Sunny? Not really. See, we have a strictly physical relationship. There we were, walking together when, suddenly, her hand sought mine all an it's own. Well, she came close... her pinkie brushed against mine, right? Then, boldly, my pinkie wrapped around hers and..." he trailed off, finally noticing something that should have been obvious. First, his back had been against a tree, so how did he back away from the beauty? Second, where'd the meadow go? Actually, wait, wasn't this like a tree shaped house? He was... Wait... "Are we in the tree!?"
"Nothing gets past you, does it human?" her voice asked. The sarcasm was withering.
"Listen here, see, I'm the character that gets the witty banter!" he exclaimed, half-heartedly shaking a fist in her general direction. "But really, how... No, first, much more important... I don't know if you've realized this or not already, but I /have/ a /name/ you know!"
"I'm aware. Your name is human, just like your race. Who cares? If I take a really long nap you'll be dead and gone and I'll still be here, so who even cares?"
"I care! Oi, how would you like it if I called you a human all the time?"
"Insulted. For one, that's not what I am."
"So?"
"So? SO!? Listen here human, I can easily leave you stuck here! Even if you somehow did escape, I can just track you down again!"
"You just want to kiss me. My mother was right, never trust salespeople or pretty women."
"What happened to beautiful?"
"Oi, your attitude detracts from your looks! Return my belief in pretty girls! Return it right now!"
"Grrr! No... Calm... Don't let the human upset you..."
"Hey humie, wanna tumble in the bushes? We can rut like the animals. Hey, you listening to me, humie?"
"What are you even saying! For a kid, you sure are pretty foul!"
"Coming from the creepy old lady stealing kisses from children, that is pretty insulting."
"What'd you call me, now?" There was a dangerous tone to her voice.
"You heard me!"
"And what if I didn't? Care to repeat it?"
"Ah... they do say that the mind is the first thing to go, but maybe I was wrong... maybe it's the ears..."
"Now, that I can't overlook!"
The pair were face to face now, noses almost touching, as they glared at each other spitefully. Then, Ian's finger came up and touched the tip of her nose. "Boop."
Her eyes went round with surprise, then narrowed speculatively. "Wait a minute... What are you plotting?"
"ME? You convince me to follow you into the woods, leaving those you call my friends behind, then push me against a tree and steal my first kiss! I'm the one plotting over here? I want you to know, I'm saving myself for marriage."
"The hell does that mean, saving yourself? What exactly are you implying you dangerous little human?"
"I'm the dangerous one? I'm the victim here! My freaking /chastity/ is in danger around you. Hey, is this the part where you pretend to stumble and push me down? My mother taught me about women like you! First it's 'I'm sorry', next comes 'Just a little longer, please?' and finally it's 'I promise, I'll take responsibility!' right? Hey, am I right? D-don't come any closer!"
The boy started backing away like he was afraid, which was admittedly a lie on his part... and the girl stumbled, falling against him in her haste to reassure him. She barely got a word out before he screamed, "EEK! I knew it!"
"You! You are mistaken! Hey, stop that! Stop it right now!"
He tried retreating, yet managed only to trip while still half holding her in his arms. He did /try/ to push her away, but... That wasn't going to end well. There were two screams, his and hers, then a thunk as they landed, her on top of him. His head was really starting to hurt just then... Wait, this situation. "H-hey now..."
"Just... Just give me a little more time, please?"
He stared at her for five seconds, then wrapped his arms around her, protectively even. The boy's finger was really starting to hurt him, just then, but... "W-will you... P-promise me you'll t-take r-resp-ponsib-bilit-ty!" he stuttered out, heart in his throat.
"What does that even mean?" she complained, holding him in a tight grip, keeping him close to her.
"It means... you'll marry me after... Because if any other person finds out about this, I'll never be able to marry anyone else anyway!"
"You're pretty weird, human."
"I have a name!"
"I know... it's Ian, right? Ian Maris, second son of the lord here? I've known about you for some time..."
"That's not my True Name," he denied gently, whispering in her ear. "My name is... Ow! My finger!"
"Let me look," she said, pulling away from him and reaching for his hand. He gave it to her, blushing like some new-bride meeting her husband after their wedding. "Looks like you've got a splinter," was added, followed by her removing said splinter and tossing it aside. Then she kissed said finger. "There," her voice said, nearly singing to him, "All better!"
"So what, should I do the same for you?" he asked, indicating a splinter rather obviously embedded in her hand. He didn't wait though, putting action to words before she had a chance to say anything... which might have been a mistake. He felt her tense up on top of him, then freeze as he lightly kissed her finger in turn.
It was noteworthy that the pair had, in essence, shared blood. Furthermore, the boy now heard something unexpected... It was like a voice, speaking to him. It was a deep voice, felt more than heard, as the freaking tree communicated with the pair of him. "So mote it be. As witnessed this day, the fifth day of autumn in the year of the elf, the chosen and the champion are joined as one."
"Oi... What the hell?" that boy asked angrily. "What is this?"
"N-no! NO! This isn't allowed! Hey, I mean it! I reject this union! Old tree... Hear my words, I reject this!"
"It is done," the tree replied sternly. "Return for the sapling on the eve of the boy's twentieth year... and keep it well or suffer the consequences."
"Hey... you want to tell me what's going on? Union sounds suspiciously like a wedding and, frankly, my father would oppose such a thing."
The blushing woman looked down on the boy, obviously upset. She tucked her hair behind her left ear, revealing the pointed ear of an elf. "U-uhm... S-so a union between elves... But you're a human... and I'm only... I'm a half-human, but it shouldn't be... This is... Wh-what even..."
"Sunny is going to /love/ this..."
"I'm sure I can get us out of this! I will not be tamed like the prophecy implies! I will not!"
"I hope not," the boy said darkly, "You'd be boring if you were. Take me back to the others... we'll enjoy dinner together and then... I'll leave the future to you, but no funny business!"
"I.. uhm... s-so... Just so you are aware, between elves... partners share a life-span... so my life is linked to yours. If I die, you die... and if you die, I die. So... I'm ah... I'm ah... If we can't break this then I... I will... s-s-serve you."
"No, sorry, not happening. You can stand beside me if you like, but that serving stuff implies things I don't care to think about... Ugh, let's just go home. My father will figure it all out for us."
"R-right... let's uhm... let's go!"
CREATORS' THOUGHTS 
Jahrik
Jahrik Entertainment is hard. Ugh... OH! You there! Yes, you! H-hello there! Cheer me up a little? Any little thing will do... H-hug? I mean... I was thinking maybe just a comment or a wish for success, but beggars can't be choosers... C'mere you!
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