Chapter 9: Chapter 9: A Royal Pain
"Next subject, please!"
I had not expected to ever be shouting like I was today. I despised it, as necessary as I found it. The yelling and screaming were so vulgar and rude but there was truly no other way to get these unruly people to listen. I had almost forgotten the presence I had begun to carry myself with.
It was still surreal, becoming the most important person in my nation. My confidence at the least had been improving, little by little. You do not learn how to run a country overnight, so those around me have helped me to relax. Adoria is posted outside my room almost every night. I cannot lie and say I have interfered slightly to have her be the one guarding me whenever possible. It simply feels a lot easier to know it is not simply a guard outside looking out, but a dear friend.
The next citizen to make their way to address me was someone I would never fail to recognise.
Fraus
His dirt-brown mop hiding a half of his face, I could clearly see the wry smile from underneath and I felt shivers down my spine as I prepared myself for whatever it could be.
"Like many others, Your Majesty, I am here of a concern!"
This was not like him. He is far too happy. Too friendly. How would he twist it to frame me as the villain in this scenario then?
His exaggerated bowing and kneeling made me particularly uncomfortable.
"To the point if you would, Fraus."
Oh Adoria, whatever would I do without you? It was no exaggeration to say I had found a best friend within these walls with Adoria. All things considered; I have been very lucky. She had such a wonderful way with words, truly.
"Well, Your Majesty, I feel you are still not considering the implications of some advisors suggestions!"
"These suggestions being?"
"Why, the World Rail of course, Your Majesty! In a time of new rulership, do you not think it will be far more dangerous in such uncertain times?"
"Fraus. I do hope this is not heading where I think it may be."
"Let me finish, Your Majesty! Now, I know we talked about weaponizing the World Rail-"
"Enough!"
I had found myself growing angrier by the minute with this man. How could you possibly think of such a thing?
"We will not install armies and weaponry where they are not needed! The World Rail is protected fine as it is. I do not want to have to hear this again Fraus."
"I am not finished!"
With a defeated sigh, I slumped back down in the throne throwing a lazy wave of defeat with my arm in the air, conceding that I would have to at least hear the whole thing.
"Go on, Fraus..."
"As I was saying, we discussed the arming of the World Rail. But what if instead, we were to have our own carriages along the railway. We could still do with transport across Terra, your majesty!"
I could not believe that I was beginning to agree with what Fraus was saying. I had been wanting to mention an expansion of the World Rail. It was something I planned on taking to the council as I knew it would affect the other nations too.
"Well, I must say that development of the World Rail is something that has been in my plans for quite a while now. Please go on, Fraus."
"Transport everywhere! All through The Great Woods and to The Lost Woods!"
"What of the settlements beneath the surface? Sub-terra?"
This was the true test. This was the part where I would find myself faced with resistance every time. Unfortunately, this issue was very close to my heart so the one discussing with me had to be very specific in what they wanted for my approval. This was the moment.
"Sub-terra? Well, there's no need for them! We don't need to cater to those below us, your majesty. Don't be propesterous, they're not truly part of-"
"Get out."
I could feel myself turning a violent shade of red from the anger swelling up within me. I had not even heard his response before I repeated myself.
"Get out! I will not have you say such things within my halls! I do not wish to see your face in here until you have washed your mouth of such awful sayings!"
I took no further visitors that afternoon. There was no use in it. I would have only reacted harshly when it was uncalled for. Truly regretful though I felt for those who had been waiting for some time now, only to be turned away due to the hurtful comments of another disrespectful subject. Perhaps this is why I was called upon to rule over Terra? It could not just be due to my feelings on Sub-terra, surely?
Later on that evening, I found myself having a small private council with the two people I trusted most at this point in time. Yes, I found it hard to believe that Dahlia was one of them as well but I truly could not fault her advice or her guidance. I had warmed up to her somewhat by now. It had only taken a little over a month. Adoria was the other of course. Who else would it be? I had found myself devising more and more excuses to have her around me. It was a blessing to have people I could count on like this.
"What you did was right, your majesty. Fraus was doing nothing but disrespecting you the whole time."
"Do you truly think so, Adoria? I would have thought that I became too heated early on due to the disagreement from nearly half a month ago now."
"Not all, girl! Trust me, as a former Queen, sometimes you just need to put someone in their place! You showed spunk, Lutum! I'm praising you for once so you better take it, eh!"
"V-very well."
That stuttering acknowledgement was all I could manage for the moment. It seems I had not been as far off as I had thought I might be. Both of the people I trusted the most within these walls were fully supportive of me. So why does that doubt keep returning? I have been making the right choices as of late. Something that until recently, I had been worried I would never do. In fact, I was even starting to feel pride at being called the Earthen Mother. I had not been sure at first if it was pride or delusion, but it was becoming ever so clear. I was meant to lead this nation! I was a firm believer in fate and destiny, so this had to be mine. There did not have to be much more to it. It felt as if almost everything was beginning to become complete.
"Your Majesty...you're daydreaming again. Or maybe it's just dreaming, looking at the time?"
Adoria was right. Dahlia had silently excused herself while I had become absorbed in my own small world, imagination running wild once again.
"Adoria...I have a question."
"Yes, your majesty?"
The doubts would come and go, but this question was one I was certain I knew the answer to already. I simply wanted the gratification from the affirmation coming from the mouth of someone I trusted and loved so dearly.
"Am I a good Queen, Adoria?"
"Well...does my answer affect the likelihood of losing my job as soon as tomorrow?"
Adoria did not give me time to interject, stunned as I was.
"Calm down, your majesty! I am joking!" A large grin had found its way upon Adoria's face, her lips curling upwards towards the scar adorning her cheeks. I had not quite realised how beautiful it made her, despite perhaps looking out of place on such a young woman. If I was a young man, I would have thought that the sight would cause knots in my stomach. She was stunning. I was in a trance as she continued what she was saying.
"Of course, I think you are a good Queen, Your Majesty. No, Lutum. I believe in the choices of The Great Oak and I think the choice has been shaping up to be perhaps the greatest ruler we have ever had. You're YOUNG, Your Majesty. I do not think you are perfect-but you do not have to be! You will grow and improve even decades from now. That much is natural. Does that answer your question?"
"Of...of course it does, Adoria. Thank you. Truly."
I could not help myself. I had become so worked up over everything my dear friend had just described to me, I could not resist pulling her into a tight hug for longer than either of us would like to admit. It simply felt so natural.
Once again, it felt like destiny. I was not only destined to meet with Adoria and become the Queen of Terra-but it was also fate that we had such a strong bond. Dahlia may be among the two people I trust the most within these walls, but Adoria is without a doubt the person I have placed the most trust in for a long time.
It felt just like when I was with Gaius and we knew we could come to each other with anything, knowing that our secrets and our relationships would stay very much in tact and unbroken. I was worried I would be missing something like this.
I was sure Gaius would be just fine managing back home, though. He had Lami to look after him, after all. There was nothing that girl could not do if she set her mind to it. Her happiness was honestly infectious. She could not help but spread cheer and joy to everyone she happened to come across. Other than Gaius, she was who I missed the most, even more than my dear Mother and Father.
"Adoria, I have been wondering. What has driven you to the path you are on now? Is it not lonely?"
"Well Your Majesty, it certainly has not had many a dull moment starting from around a month ago. I do not have to be lonely. I serve a great cause, and a wonderful Queen."
"The friends in the Knights are who provide companionship then? That is good to hear, Adoria, unity between our squads are essential in times of change-"
"Your Majesty, you may have been missing my point."
"Oh?"
"Never mind...let's drop that. I have many a friend. I hope you do not feel as if you are alone anymore, either, Your Majesty."
"Well, do not be preposterous. I could not say such a thing when I have both you and Dahlia looking out for me. I have also been spending more time with Uli as of late as well. In fact, I consider most of those residing within these walls my good friends."
"Only most, Your Majesty?"
She had heard right. Most. There was one man who I despised more than anything else in this world at the moment.
Fraus.
"Do you really not know who I speak of, Adoria?"
"Care to enlighten me, Your Majesty?"
"Fraus, of course! That...that wretch! That bone-headed fool!"
"Of course...Your Majesty. Despite his disrespectful ways, you should still do your utmost to get along with him when you can. It is not as if you will be seeing any less of each other, so you should both build up tolerances quicker."
Adoria did not sound like someone as young as she looked. The contrast between experience and her youth was truly a sight to behold. The scar on her face as well as the words of wisdom flowing into my ears like the tale of an old bard.
I found myself falling into a stunned silence after that. It had seemed so strange. Had she truly been that impressive? I was second-guessing myself immediately on that as well. Of course she had been. This was Adoria, after all.
"Your Majesty, I must be going now, my apologies. My patrol is beginning soon. We have spent many an hour here and it has been as wonderful as always but we must part."
"Oh, of course, Adoria! Please, go! It was wonderful to chat with my good friend again."
"Your Majesty."
"Yes?"
"You can let go now...I do appreciate the affection, but I really do need to be on my way."
My face flushed a fiery red as I came to the realisation that I still had my arms wrapped around Adoria and my head on her shoulder. Stunned speechless, my only actions to follow were a confused stutter and shuffling away from Adoria, several feet of space between us to allow her to exit for the night. At least she had been smiling on her way out. I hoped that this would mean she did not feel resentful of these actions or anything of the sort.
For a large part of the remaining evening, I attempted to calm my thoughts as I had found myself far too worked up over what was such a simple thing. I was emotional today after Fraus earlier, that was all. I would calm myself by writing to Gaius and Lami, as I usually would. That would always help to calm me down.
I began with Lami, detailing all the things that had amazed me in the past weeks as well as the things that had dearly hurt me. I read over all of what she had sent me, of course. It was good to read that Gaius had been managing okay despite our separation. Having Lami there would certainly make it easier for anyone.
After placing my quill down, for what I sure was for good that night, I began to prepare myself to retire for the night. Until I saw there was an unopened letter. It was so strange. It seemed slightly damp, and was in an awful state. It was clearly addressed to me, but the handwriting was far sloppier than most I had come across before.
Catching my attention, I carefully began to open it. It was only six words, but there was no doubting who I was from. I could feel the letter slipping away from my hands as I felt a wrench of pain in my stomach. As if someone had punched me in the gut.
Six words, etched into my dreams that night. The mention of my name was not something I even remembered finding in it. I simply knew.
I miss you.
I love you.
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