Chapter 23: Deal
After thinking for a short while, I finally made my decision. I removed my foot off the bancho's back then crouched down.
"Where's the pocket knife?" I asked him.
"P-Pocket knife?" The bancho seemed to be confused at the change of topic, and at the same time scared.
"Yeah." I stopped lifting his arm and repositioned it held down on his back. "You're a cocky underhanded delinquent, obviously you'd have one."
"..." The bancho stayed completely silent.
"So you do have one!" I lifted his arm again and started to apply pressure. "Where is it~ Come on~ Tell me~"
"Now." I suddenly pulled hard as I changed my teasing tone.
"Ah @$%@! It's in my right pocket!" The bancho shouted in pain.
"Thanks~" I changed back to a playful voice, though it just made him tremble.
Shrugging, I resecured his arm to his back. I then held it down with my left hand while I checked his right pocket with my right.
And I found… a phone.
…
I tossed the phone behind me. I heard a faint no from under me. Looking back down, I found a dejected expression on the bancho's face.
"You lied to me~" I disregarded it and began to pull on his arm for the nth time.
"W-Wait! It's in my pants' right pocket! Not my jackets'!" The bancho immediately got rid of his sadness and hurriedly tried to explain himself.
"Hmm… Last chance~" I gave him a... 'happy' smile and he shivered again.
I heard the faint sound of him gulping. I ignored it and repeated the steps before, but this time checked the pants instead.
Finding the pocket knife, I pulled it out and examined it. It was pretty normal and had signs of being used often.
I flipped out the knife and saw that it was a bit rusty. If someone gets stabbed with this, they'll at the bare minimum get a cold. It'll probably hurt a lot too.
"Hey, don't you ever clean this?" I let him go and stood up.
"I- Oof!"
I stepped on his back when I saw him trying to get up.
"You should just stay down." I played around with the pocket knife, flipping it in and out.
"And as for you guys," I looked around at the goofs that were just standing there. They even shivered when my gaze was on them. "What are you even doing?"
"I mean really? You guys just stood there while your bancho was getting owned." I had a 'just why' look on my face.
"I'm not-"
"Shut up." I pressed on the bancho's back and he immediately went silent.
"Sigh, I'm really curious why you all aren't doing anything." I looked at the twirling pocket knife in my hand. "I wonder if someone could help me answer that."
"Hmm… How about you?" I pointed at Shuu with the pocket knife, right as the blade flipped out.
"Me?" Shuu looked shocked from being picked.
"The knife is pointing at you, isn't it?" I flipped the blade in then out again. "Now tell me before I throw this at you."
"Well I-"
"Actually, no." I interrupted him and pointed the knife towards Haika. "You answer."
"Why me?!" Haika was completely nervous.
"Because you're the submissive one." I gave him an 'obviously' look. "Since you're the bottom, it's better for you to talk."
"You-You-You!!!" Haika blushed red with anger, while Shuu also blushed. The goofs around glanced at the two with a curious look.
"I'm not submissive!" Haika shouted with embarrassment. "Even if I am, there's no way I'm the bottom!"
'Wow. He's playing directly into your hands.'
All according to keikaku. (Note: Keikaku means plan.)
'That old meme doesn't work here you boomer. We're in Japan.'
… Shit.
[What's wrong host?]
It's nothing too bad. I can take care of it.
[Ok?]
Containing my immense disappointment, I focused back on the two red cherries. When Haika finished shouting, Shuu became a shade redder and the gaze of everyone around us turned strange.
"Oh really?" Seeing the cherries I immediately became happier. I gave Haika a sly smile. "Then how about you prove it?"
"H-How?" Haika was hesitant on hearing my so-called proving.
"Kiss him. Kiss him right on the lips." I sooo had a mischievous smile on my face. "Only that will prove your dominance."
"…"
It took a while for Haika to fully register what I said. Then poof! A scarlet red tomato is ready to harvest! Actually, make that two!
"Pft-" I tried to contain my laughter to not have the tomatoes overripe, which didn't work that well. "You two are so cute like this, you know?"
"Y-You-You!" Shuu stuttered as the two tomatoes sadly became overripe. I even think the smaller one has broken down.
'No, you really broke him.'
Huh. I wonder if I could make Ryuu like this.
'A blushing Ryuu?'
The two of us started to imagine him blushing as red as this. His handsome face all red, lying under me, completely stripped naked and begging for mercy.
'Yeah! It would be great if he'll blush like this every time we kiss!'
Huh? Y-Yeah! Kissing making Ryuu red is great!
'...'
…
'You thought of dirty things didn't you?'
...
"Ah well, enough messing around." I pointed the pocket knife towards the guy that had 60 points with the bancho. "You answer my question instead since those two can't anymore."
'You disgust me, you filthy pedophile.'
[???] (System: What's going on? What's with the host?? Is she mental???)
I tuned the rant about me sexualizing a teenager out and paid attention to the situation at hand.
"Y-Yes?!" The guy seemed surprised at my action, not expecting it at all.
"Tell me," I looked down to the guy under my feet before looking back up confused. "Why aren't you guys helping your bancho? You're all just standing still."
'He's only 16! It's already bad enough that we're dating someone younger!'
"W-Well, w-we don't want to get our n-nuts kicked." The goof stuttered and looked down embarrassed.
"Well… I suppose that's a valid reason." I looked back down at the bancho once more. "Though it's still not a good one."
'I already feel bad for doing these things! We're practically child pred-!'
Ok! First of all, we're not that old! We're only a few years apart! Not to mention, does it even make a difference with your intelligence?!
'YOU! You! You... Uh… Oh. Oooh! OH! How dare you compare me to a child?!'
…
'... Shut up.'
[Host, uh, what are you talking about?]
I'm just trash-talking to myself. I usually do this whenever 'I' think of something dumb.
'...'
[Ok?] (System: Are all humans like this?)
After sighing out a breath of frustration, I rubbed my eyes before looking back up. I saw the two cherries taking peeks at each other, turning redder when their eyes connected.
They're not even together yet they already spread so much dog food. Peh! I'll get overstuffed from this.
'... You done being mad?'
You done being dumb?
'...'
[H-Host?]
Just trash talking to myself again.
[Right...] (System: I think I picked the wrong host.)
I turned towards the 60 points goof and found him also taking peeks at me, though his reason was completely different. He was shivering in what seemed to be fear.
I gave him a cheerful smile and it went as well as I expected. Once the guy saw my smile, he shrank further. This also included the goofs around us.
I honestly think they're just pussies. Or just dumb. Probably both.
'It might be because of Otome game logic.'
It might be because you're dumb.
'... You're still mad?'
You're still stupid?
'...'
[Trash talking?]
Trash talking.
[Alright then.] (System: I definitely picked a mental host. This is fine.)
Sighing once more, I looked down at the bancho then back up. I clasped my hands together and smiled at the goofs, before looking pitifully at the bancho and making eye contact with him.
"Since you're oh so pitiful," I leaned down, "I'll make you a deal~"
"What is it?" The bancho gulped.
"I'll have Ryuu give you the territory," I made my 'smile' bigger, "And you don't bother us again, or I'll break your bones."
The bancho's eyes brightened for a short time until he heard the last part, which he then gulped again.
"Is that a deal?" I crouched down and tilted my head a bit.
"Y-"
"Actually," I interrupted him, "That's not really a fair deal."
The bancho stayed silent and looked at me nervously.
"Don't worry, I won't ask for anything excessive." I tried to reassure him, though it didn't help that much. "Hmm..."
I stood up and thought to myself when the two cherries that were still taking peeks entered my view. I smiled to myself.
"How about this," I clapped my hands together to get the two unsuspecting victims' attention. When they stopped flirting and looked at me, I pointed at them. "If these two give each other a long french kiss, I'll say the deal is even."
CREATORS' THOUGHTS 
Inactiverightnow
Inactiverightnow Sorry for not posting for so long. I've busy since it's the last few weeks of school. Exams suck. I doubt I'll update again until school ends, but I'll try my best.
I also want to try the Webnovel Spirit Awards 2021. I know with my update rate it sounds impossible, but if I actually put some time aside to write, I could technically write one 3,000 worded chapter every day. Don't worry, I'll still update this and it'll most likely be back to weekly.
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