Chapter 43: 40. Those memories under the rain
It was almost 7pm when Yibo and Zan finished dating. They already had dinner and are currently chitchatting inside the car under the heavy rain. Zan was very happy because Yibo really bought all the Harry Potter books. Yibo was smiling while driving when he noticed how happy Zan was that the older almost looked like he was vibrating on his sit. To suppress his excitement, Zan entertained himself by drawing his finger on the windshield. Then he suddenly saw the poor straykids on the street, struggling from nature's unavoidable weather and the cold.
"In the past, I've always loved the rain..." Zan bit his bottom lip and blinked his eyes softly as if he was trying to remember a scenery. Yibo just listened attentively while keeping his eyes focused on the road.
"...Not until I met grandma and grandpa. I usually treated rain as my salvation. Because whenever I cry during those nights after getting beaten up by mom or dad, I would cry so hard when it rains. The thunder won't let my parents hear my crying voice. I would just hide in the corner, pray to God that he should still let me live even after fainting from the beatings." Zan inhaled deeply and exhaled slowly, relaxing himself so he could continue talking without shedding a tear.
"Continue, let me hear everything. You can cry if you want to, I'm here." Yibo said and held Zan's hand softly after parking the car on the safe side.
"Then, I met grandma and grandpa. When the sun shines, I am always happy to see them. Talk to them and have fun with them in the simplest ways. But I remembered that I never visited them when it rains. Inside the house, whenever I cry on rainy days, I came to realized a lot of things. I would end up thinking how cold they felt when it rains. How hard they've struggled to look for shelter to avoid from getting soaked. How many days they remained half soaked after the rain because they only had a set of clothing. I came to ask myself: Are they sleeping under the cold rain tonight? Will their clothes get dry by tomorrow? Do they curse the rain that I loved?' Then I laughed, I cursed countless times thinking how stupid I was. Then I was ashamed of myself. How could I love the rain knowing that a lot of homeless people suffer from it when it strikes? And from then on, I started loving the rain and hating it at the same time. Never thought that thing could happen; Loving and hating a certain thing at once." Zan smiled shyly and bowed his head. He was quite proud of himself that he successfully told Yibo about a certain part of his lonely past without crying.
"Then, am I like the rain?" Yibo asked. It came to him out of nowhere. Hearing the last phrase made him think that he was like the rain that Zan talked about.
"Hating and loving a person at the same time. Can I be your rain?" Yibo said and leaned closer to Zan. Zan gulped the lump inside his throat and licked his lips unconsciously. Yibo stared at Zan's moisten lips and glared back at Zan, giving the older a gaze burning with passion and desire.
"But I want to be the rain that only receives your love and not hate. Can I be?" Yibo asked with a deep voice filled with sincerity.
Zan's trembling fingertips traveled Yibo's restraining lips. He closed his eyes and let their nose touched. He smiled when he breathed Yibo's familiar scent and hot breathings. He savored the moment for a while and placed his hands beside the younger's cheeks. He tried to imagine a new scene and depended on his senses for his own imagination. While closing his eyes, Zan imagined Yibo's fresh breathe, then mixed it with how Yibo smelled when the bad boy was drenched with blood of the gangsters he had beaten up, maybe Zed's blood or the others'. Yibo's gentle voice, his laughter, the way he giggled, cursed, shouted when he got super angry; he wondered how the bad boy sounded like when he sings, Yibo's muffled cries; and how much he sounded sincere everytime he says sorry and I love you. He imagined how Yibo tasted when they shared kisses, the rusty taste of the blood on the bad boy's lips when he got a cut from a fight. Zan opened his eyes and looked at Yibo with mixed emotions. He remembered the first smile he received from that naughty lips, that horrible devil who appeared before him during his desperate times and on the verge of his death. Zan smiled and tears suddenly started falling down his eyes like a rapid water in the river or waterfalls.
"I love you so much." He said before pressing their lips together like soft feathers trying to destroy each other by friction. One could tell that that moment was the most romantic part of their life.
"I love you too, baby. My obsession towards you grows day by day whenever I'm with you." Yibo confessed. Receiving a confession from someone and discovering that they are obsessed with you is creepy and weird. When Zan heard it, he was surprised.
"Obsession? You're obsessed with me?" Zan asked while clinging unto the bad boy's neck. This was the very first time that Yibo blushed so much he wanted to kill himself. He couldn't help himself but blurt out what was inside his heart.
"Tell me please." Zan said while trying to make Yibo look at him in the eyes. The bad boy tried to change the topic by kissing Zan violently and sucking his neck.
"Come on...angh! tell me now... ah... I've told you a lot of things about me. From my past and everything... Stop sucking and talk.. Ah! You're so unfair, Yibo!-"
"...mine..."
"Huh?"
"You can't be anyone else's but mine." Yibo started. He stared at Zan like a beast trying to convince its prey that he was a good creature, "I want you to look at me 24/7. I don't like hearing you talk about other people making you happy except Xuan, Jiyang, Ma, the oldies and your parents. I want to kill everyone who tried to hurt you. I get disturbed when you cry. I want to be the reason of your smiles. I want to be the one appearing in your dreams and fantasies. I want you to depend on me, surrender to me and beg for me. I wanted to hug you so tight I'm scared I would crush you. I just... Love you... So much. I'm sorry I'm being like this."
"You really are a dangerous one, aren't you?" Zan chuckled and removed his necktie. He unbuttoned his uniform one by one while staring at Yibo intensely. The bad boy watched him strips sexily for him. The older's head leaning against the window softly. His half body now exposed while still wearing his uniform, all buttons opened. He gestured his finger to Yibo, "You forgot to say one thing though."
Yibo twitched his brows after thinking that he probably said all the things that he felt deep inside, "Really? What is it?"
Zan giggled, "You're a hundred percent impatient."
Inside the car, under the rain, the beast got lured in by its own wild prey.
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©The Bad Boy's Obsession by Arl Hesse a.k.a AHFictions
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