Chapter 4: Egress
Looking outside Es's room, I could see that nothing changed. It was still the same hallway that I came from. Glancing to the sides I could see that the other doors were still there.
(That's good...I think?)
My eyes were slowly drawn back to the simple wooden door that had the word 'Egress' on it.
(Egress…)
If I remember correctly, it roughly translates to exit from what I remember. As expected, I got the information off the Internet. That also asks another question...why would I search up what Egress means?
That doesn't matter though, because there was a more important question…
(Doesn't that mean I can leave this place?)
But if I went through there, how will I get back?
Uncertainty and doubt filled my mind. Who knew if that door was even real.
(Do I even want to come back here? What would happen to Es?)
I blanked at the last question. Why should I worry about Es? I've consciously been with her for less than an hour, and yet…
A thought came to mind.
(If I leave her...she'll be all alone.)
I then recalled what Es previously said.
'This place is closed off from the outside world.'
(Closed off? Then how do you explain this door? )
Perhaps Ego rex could answer my questions? He seems to be my best bet other than Es. Actually, he's my only bet, as I think going back to Es might annoy her too much.
I doubt with how long Es stayed in her world, she would know a lot.
(Heh kinda reminds me of someone.)
Still, with how lonely she must have been, sitting there with no one but herself...I feel a fair bit of sympathy towards her.
Well there's Ego rex, but I'm pretty sure she hates him.
And so I walked down the hallway, back to where I last found Ego rex.
During my walk, I tried to reminisce on my old life. The one before I died.
I still couldn't remember anything that was related to my family, but other than that I could still remember some other things, even if it was a little foggy.
I could still remember my room, and the unhealthy amount of time I spent cooped up there.
I was broken away from my thoughts when I saw a giant stone face abruptly appear. With its face split between a man and a woman, standing in the middle of the hallway in front of me, I still feel a little intimidated...and scared.
" We meet again
My Child
What do you
Seek from us
Lost Child?"
(Straight to the point...alright I can work with that.)
"I...want to ask questions," I spoke with firm confidence. At least, I think it was with confidence.
If there was fear or hesitation in my voice, Ego rex didn't seem to notice nor care, and he seemed to listen to my question.
"Speak your
Questions
And We shall
Answer."
Hearing its response, I let out the breath I was holding in, feeling relieved that it agreed to answer my questions.
"Ye-yes, right...uhhh..."
(Don't stutter now Jack.) I mentally said to myself.
(Come on you imbecile.)
"T-The door that says Egress would I be able to come back If I came through there?" I finally said. Although I did stutter, at least I said something.
Once again, Ego rex paid no mind to my fear or hesitation.
"Yes
You may
Come back
Here whenever"
(Oh...phew)
Feeling relieved from Ego Rex's answer, I ask another question.
"Do you know anything about this mask and how I can take it off?" I ask with high expectations.
Unfortunately it fell, like all the times where my expectations and hopes rose.
"Your mask
Is something
We do not know of."
(Oh...I see)
Feeling disheartened from hearing Ego rex's answer, I started pondering.
(Sigh, I was hoping to be able to get this mask of-)
I was interrupted when Ego rex spoke again.
"But fret
Not
For you
May find
An answer
With Es"
(Es might know?)
Lightening up from my disheartened mood, I felt delighted at the news that Ego rex spoke. Still, there was something inside me that whispered she wouldn't help.
I ignored the voice.
"I see, so Es might know."
I felt happy when I said that. This was good news, since after all, I now have a reason to vi-find some answers to my questions
"Thank you Ego rex," I said wholeheartedly. I was still grateful...even if I still feel apprehension towards this wall with a distorted face on it.
"You are
Welcome
My child
Are there
Any more
Questions
You have?"
"No, not anymore," I said firmly, almost forgetting my fears toward it.
"Very well
We shall
Meet again
My lost child"
With that being said Ego rex vanished into dust. Just like that.
It was as simple as that.
Not caring about the supernatural phenomenon as I was still feeling cheerful from Ego rex's words, I began to make my way back to Es's room.
After a few minutes, I was back at the doors, going towards Es's room I hesitate to open the door,
(Maybe I should look outside first and ask questions later?)
Deciding to go outside first I move towards the simple wooden door that had the plaque 'Egress' written on it.
Breathing deeply in order to calm myself, I opened it...I was immediately assaulted with bright light. I tried to shield my eyes, but then realized that I'm wearing a mask with no holes for eyes to see through.
How was I even assaulted by light again?
Shaking my head at how stupid the mask was, I started looking around. As far as I could see, the door I emerged from was stationed in the middle of a clearing, with enormous green trees surrounding it.
Just like any other forest.
Fully stepping out from the door, I looked up, and saw that the sun was shining through the treetops.
It appears that it was daytime, with the sun fully rising to its peak. As I was looking around in awe at the beauty of nature, I immediately tensed at a noise.
Snap
Hearing a snapping sound, I immediately whipped my head towards the direction of the sound, and became stunned.
What I found was a giant grizzly bear looking at me like I was some sort of familiar emergency food. Its eyes looked angry, and its posture looked like it was ready to pounce at me.
*Growl*
Deciding that I still wanted to live, I made the best decision to go back inside the door. Stepping back through the door, I calmly shut it behind me.
(Dumbledore would be proud.)
Shaking my head at my thoughts (how did I remember Dumbledore?) I looked back at the door. Seeing it closed I fell on my butt, the fear finally kicking in from that encounter.
(The actual fuck mate! That's it! I'm not going outside anymore! Nu-uh!)
Sweating buckets from the grizzly encounter I calmed myself down enough to head back towards Es's room.
With all the excitement I once had gone.
Opening the door I saw that Es was still reading a book. Without looking up, she started talking.
"Oh, you're back," she said, speaking in an indifferent tone of voice.
She probably heard the door creaking open, but I wasn't in the mood for that.
"Y-yeah, I'm back..." I said, still a bit shaken up from that grizzly bear encounter. How I wasn't this scared when I met a speaking, stone-faced wall was beyond me.
No pun intended.
Es looked up, seemingly hearing something in my voice.
"Did...something happened?"
"A grizzly bear was charmed by my appearance and tried to rape me." I was still a bit hysterical from it.
Es became confused, and tried to decipher if there was any hidden meaning behind my explanation.
It was a joke...but she didn't need to know that. Finally, after a couple seconds, she then focused on me.
"Do...you want to talk about it?"
"No, I don't think I will. Look, can we talk about something else?" I said, trying to leave the topic. It wasn't something I wanted to talk about.
Es heeded my request.
"Very well. What would you like to talk about?"
"Actually, I have a question for you, Es."
"What is it?"
"Do you know anything about this mask or how I can take it off?" I said.
"Your mask? What's the problem?" Es asked, putting her hand below her chin.
"Well It's impossible for me to take off, that much is certain, and...uhhh-" How do I explain that I woke up with this in a white void?
Deciding to omit the InBetween I continued
"I...also woke up with this, and with no knowledge on how it got on."
"...hmmm."
Es rubbed her chin, and after a few seconds, she spoke.
"I'm gonna be honest with you, I don't know what this mask on your face is…but the mask could signify something,"
"Signify what?" I asked confusedly. A mask on my face was supposed to symbolize something?
"I don't know," she said straightforwardly.
"...oh," I said feeling, and I couldn't help but feel a bit disappointed. I knew having expectations can be terrible.
"Although I am curious, what made you think I would know?" She inquired
"Oh, Ego rex told me," I answered nonchalantly
When I spoke those words, I saw Es's face become sour. Incredibly sour.
(Oops.)
"Tch...that damnable facade is always telling lies. They're getting full of themselves lately..." she muttered frustratedly.
For some reason, I felt that she looked hot at that moment.
Immediately shaking my head, I focused back on what she was saying...and realized she didn't snap out of her...anger?
"That self-proclaimed monarch...that facade...that wretch...damn him..."
(I probably should've never said anything about Ego rex…)
"That facade lives to plague me..."
(Oh...she's going off-topic now...great)
I decided to not say anything, letting her continue her rant. She looked like she needed it.
"'Fall not to impulse! Conform to the standard!' Over and over they keep whispering to me-!"
I just kept listening while nodding every once in a while.
"What need is there for a social structure here? This place is closed off from the outside world, you idiots!" Es ranted, and she started breathing quickly, her fists gripping.
I blinked. I thought it was just a rant, but it seemed this went deeper than I thought it would. As I got back into the mindset of listening, I heard Es sighing.
Focusing back on her, it seemed as if Es had calmed down.
"Hmm...sorry about that. I got off-topic. Still, on this topic...what's your take on it?"
"My take on what?"
"The facade and its rules," she said, staring at me intently. Although her face was blank and emotionless, I could tell there was something in her eyes.
Something quite scary.
"Oh, I think… well it depends on the time and place really," I said, choosing my words carefully. Something tells me my answer is really important to her.
Es stared at me for a while. When I thought it was about to be awkward, she turned away, looking at the side.
"Hmph, such an ambiguous answer...but it beats that facade any day."
"...ok," I said in a deadpanned voice. As if reading my mind, she turned to look back at me, and started explaining.
"You see...that facade is my adversary. They would control me like a judge and jury."
"...I see," nodding, I gestured for her to continue. Even if I didn't get the full picture, I could tell she must've really hated Ego rex and the voices.
"Listen…you hear it don't you? They're voices…!" her mutterings turned into ravings, and her face started to twist even more.
I could feel a shiver crawling on my back.
(I thought she was a normal person...but it looks like she has problems to.)
Wait, to? Before I began to even find similarities between me and Es, Es continued her rant once more.
"Damn you! Hush! You damnable Facade! I...I...!"
Her frustrated voice slowly died down to a downcasted one.
"I'm not mistaken! I'm not a failure! I-I…!"
"..."
At that moment, Es seemed to snap out of her rant, and looked at me. Although I was quite scared, I retained my calm expression, looking at her deeply.
"Forgive me, I can't focus on a conversation right now."
".."
"If you don't mind come ba-"
I cut her off when I suddenly went in and hugged her.
"...there there," I whispered, hugging her.
"...what do you think you're doing?" Es said. Although I can't see her face, there was something in her tone that said everything about the situation.
"Consoling you?" I responded.
"Get off me."
"Well, you're not resisting..."
"..."
"..."
It was silent, and that continued until a minute later, and I finally decided to release Es from the hug.
I'm not gonna lie, that felt great.
"Come Es, let's talk a bit more to get your mind off the...facade."
Outside I was calm but inside an inner turmoil was raging on.
(YOU FUCKING DUMBASS! THAT WAS ABSOLUTELY EMBARRASSING! AHHHHHHHH-)
My mind was screaming profanities at me for hugging Es, Speaking of Es, looking at her now I could see that she too was flustered by the unexpected hug,
I could see her flabbergasted look on her face.
(Cute.)
Is what I thought when I saw her flabbergasted face.
(Shut up me, we're still in a conversation.)
Coming back to reality I could see that she was still quiet, So I decided to speak first.
"Let's talk about books. What are they to you?"
Es, finally snapping out of her silence, finally looking a little annoyed at my stunt, but seemed to have decided to answer my question anyways.
"...books are to me what breathing is to others," she said calmly, although her eyes seemed to be twitching.
(Hah, how the turns have been tabled.)
Wait was it 'how the tables have turned? I forgot.
I mentally shrugged as Es continued talking.
"I cannot make myself sane without books to read. For the sake of my sanity...I immerse myself in the world I find within each book."
I nodded. I can understand that, as it was similar to how I imagine myself when I watch anime or read.
"Even now, as I stand here, conversing with you…I am fighting down my very impulses...to put my hands around your throat...to…" she whispered, her hands gripping and releasing, gripping and releasing...
I almost ran towards the door.
(Oh dear lord, she is insane. Wait, is it from that hug?)
I kept my face calm, and thought about what happened just seconds ago. I did enjoy that hug...
(Wait, am I insane to?)
As I became stunned at the revelation, Es seemed to have collected herself.
She coughed into her fist.
"Ahem. Sorry, I'm still a bit affected by your...stunt, Still may I ask you something?"
"Shoot."
"Should I restrain my impulses? Tell me."
"Get a hold of yourself Es, I don't want to be choked by you."
(Well...it would be an entirely different story if-) was left unsaid, as I realized that it might not be a good thing to say in this situation.
"Get a hold of myself? Is that even possible?"
"It depends on you entirely Es," I said seriously, still thinking about how hot it would be if-no, don't think that. Serious thoughts...serious thoughts...
"T-Thank you, I'm…fine,now. They were just so loud. I...got confused. Speaking to you seems to have calmed me."
"That's good. Stay like that, and we'll be fine," I said softly, trying to appear as if I was on her side.
Well I am, but I don't know how an almost insane person like her will think.
"I'm well, I am. For now. I'm still alright."
"See? That's great-!"
"I know how to tame my impulses. You see, I'm fairly certain I won't do anything…like wringing your sweet neck...yes, that's right...you can trust me...hehehe..."
"...are you still mad about that hug?"
For the first time, I saw Es wore a slight smile, and that somehow unnerved me a bit.
"What do you mean mad?"
"..."
Taking a deep breath I spoke-
"I trust you, I trust you so much that I'm not gonna sleep right now. and just read through your books."
"...don't damage them.," she said seriously.
"What do you think I am? A child?"
(Wait, on second thought-)
"Actually, don't answer that."
Seeing that Es didn't answer, I took it as a sign of the conversation ending, and began to walk to one of the random shelves to pick a book. Once I was done picking, I walked towards the sofa to sit down. I glanced at Es, only to see that she was back to her usual self,reading her books.
(Sigh)
That woman...Es. I don't know what to think about her. Specifically I don't know what to feel about her.
Mentally sighing I start to read the book that I picked.
("The art of alchemy-transmutations.")
(Let's hope this won't be boring.) I thought as I turned a page.
Chapter end-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A/N Note: IM ALIVEEEE HAHAHAHA still being serious i procrastinated writing this chapter sorry for that btw, Sike im not sorry. Once again be sure to leave a power stone it's free and you can always wait one day before it recharges.
Editor's Note: This guy is greedy :D
A/N- nah
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