Chapter 32: My words are final

His secretary! My mind was still reeling about his announcement. What in the world is happening. It is bad enough that we are working in the same company. Why do I need to be his secretary?

"Mr. Kempt, I believe Ericka can be a better candidate as your secretary. I think I will be more of a burden than of help." I said trying to worm my way out of the entire mayhem that was about to happen.

I don't think Ericka and I can exist in the same space without tearing each other apart. I can just feel hatred emanating from her. And that hatred is directed straight at me. Although I have no freaking idea why she hates me so. I really want to know why that is the case but I still no do not want to take chances and jeopardize my employment. I have just found a reason for me to keep on. I have lost too much already. And I am not willing to subject myself to further pain, humiliation and failure.

"I think Helena is right, Mr. Kempt. She does not have the qualification to be an administrative assistant. From where I graduated, we were trained to be a jack of all kinds, so administrative work is a piece of cake for me." Ericka said with a condescending tone.

Wow! In just a few chosen words, she managed to demean me and lift herself up a notch. I admit that I did not come from a prestigious university. A state university is where I graduated from but that does not mean that I have poor qualifications. I graduated top of my class with a 1.0 average. A lot of job opportunities have opened up for me even before I graduated but I chose to concentrate on my studies first as advised by Bry and her parents. They said that those opportunities can wait. I have not enjoyed time for myself and that I owe that to me.

I knee they were right. Even since I was little, I have always made sure that others are not inconvenienced because of me. I tend to put others and their needs before mine. I would always be the one to let go of the toys that some kid would want to play with. I would also do chores others are assigned to do. I would share almost all my food and end up with almost nothing because they ate it all up already.

There was once instance where Bry gave me a stuffed teddy bear because she knows how I live them. I went home happy and in love with the pink fluffy bear. The moment I went inside the gate, another kid my age saw the teddy I was holding and decided that she wants it too. She pestered me all day long. When she realized that I am not yeilding, she cried infront of the head of the orphanage saying that I would not even let her borrow. The kind woman asked me if I could lend my teddy, though I was very reluctant I lent it to her. She went out happily and told the other kids that she received a toy from someone anonymous.

"But that is mine." I said loudly while I was trying to go to her. But the head of the orphanage, Sister Teresa held me back and said, "Just let her be, Helena. She is moving to a better home next week. Her new family is coming to get her. Can you for the meantime let her have the teddy?"

I just nodded. I remembered receiving a pat in the back and a " Good girl" comment. Usually hearing that I am a good girl brought satisfaction to me. But that day, it brought anger. Why should I be the one to give it up? It was given to me. Even if I lent it to her she does not have the right to tell everyone that it was hers. Why would Sister Teresa just let her tell a lie? These thoughts surprised me.

I have always loved Sister Teresa and treated her like my mother. I have never questioned her actions nor decisions and advices. I felt ashamed back then, just because of a stuffed toy, I was willing to defy the person who by all intents and purposed served as my mother. I talked my young self out of that anger.

When Bryanna knew about me giving the stuffed toy up for some kid, she got mad and did not talk to me. I waited at her doorstep everyday for that entire summer but she never talked to me. One day her dad came upon me while I was waiting for her. I told him everything that happened. He just nodded and told me to go home and that he will talk to Bryanna. The next day, I saw Bry and her family's car in the driveway of the orphanage. Bry came running to me and hugged me saying that she missed me like crazy. We played and I saw Bry's parents talking to Sister Teresa but I paid them no mind. I was just happy that my best friend is no longer mad at me. When they left, I saw Sister Teresa looking at me with disappointment in her eyes. I did not understand it at that time. Then the kid who claimed the teddy as her own came to me and handed me the toy back. That was when I realized that Bry's parents talk to Sister Teresa. They defended me since no one was there to do that for me. I was too young to do that for myself. I was happy and felt warm all over. For the first time in my life, I felt that someone other than Bry and Sister Teresa cared for me.

But that feeling did not last long. The kid who wanted the toy told every kid that the toy was given to her but because I kept begging Sister Teresa for it, she gave it up. She twisted the whole story for her own benefit. I was ostracized because of that. Some kids would even go as far as calling me a thief. I understood where the hatred was coming from. We always receive used clothes as a present and never a brand new one. Let alone toys. The toys the orphanage receive would be shared by everyone. I was the first kid to own a brand new toy. This was a source of envy for all the kids. I just kept quiet, comforting myself that what they are saying was not true. That I did nothing wrong. It was quite a lonely time for me in the orphanage. I did not have anyone to play with. Even Sister Teresa did nothing so stop the other kids from bullying me. She did not even defend me. After that incident, I realized that not everyone who was nice to you actually care for you. I only have Bry and my teddy.

"I don't remember asking for both you opinions. Whether or not you are qualified is for me to decide not you. Even your regularization is for me to decide even if you are strongly recommended by everyone." Ashton reprimanded us in a stern voice. Ms. Maureen looked up in surprise. A testament of how well natured and calm Ashton normally is.

"Both of you will worl with Jennifer starting tomorrow as trainees for the secretarial position. My word is final." he said. "And I have my own reasons for doing this." he quietly added while looking at me.

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