Chapter 3: The Beginning Of The End
When I felt my consciousness return to me I feel like I have fully integrated into this boy named Ryan Coltis so I am obviously thinking something along the lines of "Was I reincarnated?" which is the theory I'm going to use for now because this is obviously not a dream and anyway I have never dreamt a dream so real.
When I gaze at the sight in front of me I gasp in a low voice which is most likely this body instinctive reaction to try to not get caught but can you guess what is in front of me...
Not some dead body not my whole dead family but something that is, though not as emotionally scarring is this pretty mentally damaging of a-a-a.. my girlfriend cheating on me...
My girlfriend someone I have thought of like my soulmate someone who I have been seeing for over a year is....i-is sleeping with another man...a-another man...I don't even know what to feel at this point, should I feel mad because she lied to me and mentally pushed me aside for another man, or happy because I know she will not be the woman for me if she has slept with another man...
While I am thinking about this bundle of emotions that would make any man confused about how this happened for someone to feel this difference of a range of emotions at once but right when I was thinking all of these degrading thoughts about how I should feel questions started to fill my mind about what else she could have done...
Has she slept with multiple other guys, have I only been somebody she can emotionally torment and scar me for life, is this....a g-game for her....while these types of thoughts that were degrading her filled my mind even thoughts that degraded me filled my mind going along the lines of "W-was I a bad boyfriend" or "Was I the reason that she cheated on me, maybe I was so unbearable and she tried to continue to date me to spare my feelings or I have some sort of debt collectors after me so she paid with her body but I have never even filed for a loan though"
All these emotions burst forth in a rage but common sense limited those emotions to try to not get caught and get put in an extremely awkward situation but just when I am slowly getting the hang of these out of control emotions I caught a tiny look at the guy she was cheating with but that tiny look broke my mind...
S-she i-is c-he-eating...with Brian of all people.....Brian of all people...not some random person but Brian?! I slowly felt my cheek and feel a liquidy sensation that can only be described as a tear, my-my everything the people I trusted a-all...betrayed me.
Brian Johnson also known as my childhood friend ever since childhood was sleeping with my girlfriend...and he knows she is my girlfriend so w-why did he do something that he knew from common sense would make me have trust issues or something of the sort, but he still did it...
Why-Why-Why-Why why is someone like me who showered my girlfriend with love and have been friends with Brian my whole life and I have never done anything to warrant something like this...Is this just how life works will people like me that try to have pure relationships built on love always be last in life in the game of love...?
When I'm thinking about this while trying to hold my tears back but failing miserable and I am making that *hiccup* sound you would make when you try to hold your tears back, but suddenly a question pops up in my head that I have been unconsciously suppressing ever since I found out about her affair is.... were both of them sleeping together even before she got together with me...did she only get together with me because he said so or something...
Is all these feelings that I have felt for her and the love that I felt at the bottom of my heart for her....for her just something that was "funny" just a lovesick boy that believes in his own fairytale of life believing everything will be fine with a best friend and girlfriend just comedic to her...or maybe she just felt pity and so much pity to accept my proposal...
Was this year full of love and care to me, just a relationship built on lies.....?
While thinking this I fall into despair that I have never felt in my whole life, practically everything I have ever believed in has been crashed and burned, or was this how they were this whole time and I just could not see it...
How much will this affect them, negligible at best because there, not the ones that were cheated on, there not the ones that wholeheartedly believed in someone and that they will never do any wrong and that we are in a perfect relationship just for someone that you believed in nearly the same as I did for her just to take a hammer and throw it at it...
They have never felt like their whole life is a lie or that they cannot trust even the most trustworthy people because they may have a hidden motive for doing it or doing it may lead to something worse happening in my life..
My mind can't help but wander to what would happen if I never met Brian...would I still be in a loving relationship with my girlfriend...would I just have no girlfriend in general...or did he affect my life in a bigger way than even I could imagine...
While I am thinking these thoughts suddenly a series of events played out in my mind head but the core point of all these events were that they orchestrated this whole thing because they...both are sadists.....is that all I ever amounted in there heart just a tool to satisfy your urges to see people despair...
No-No-No that was the final straw I will not stand for this, I will not stand to be mistreated like this but right when I was about to scream, practically when the sounds were going through my vocal cords I suddenly blacked out...
Waking up my first thought was "Why am I blacking out so much lately do I have some sort of disease or something" but when I just finished that thought mere milliseconds later a torrent of memories that I tried to suppress because of how traumatic they suddenly came flowing out but I was probably thinking something along the lines of "W-why" but just when I thought that a cold robotic voice sounded in my head but at the same time in my ears of...
[1st Trial Cleared]
[2nd Trial Commencing]
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