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Chapter 8: Chapter 7

Few days before Afghanistan….

Peter Parker was quite intelligent, though at times, quiet and shy, he was always pretty observant.

When he first met Tobias Macguire, he felt something was off about him. Though J. Jonah Jameson did seem like a jerk, Peter felt that Toby was not a very good influence. There were many things that Peter did not agree with Toby about.

For one, Toby described Captain America as a "walking American propaganda poster" and Tony Stark as an "Old chump who should go back to preschool and learn how to have a life."

Though otherwise, even if he didn't seem like it, and tried to hide it, Toby was actually a pretty good person. Just, sort of weird.

He seemed to hate his boss with a passion, yes, and for some reason, detested sand and lizards but around his Aunt May and Uncle Ben, Toby felt different, as if they were old relatives that had finally reunited.

He also saw Toby actually do something nice, while Peter was on his way to school, as he passed by on his rickety green bicycle, Toby could be seen, genuinely smiling while feeding ducks, what seemed to be bread?

He had also seen him helping to pick up garbage.

Maybe, he did have some redeeming qualities to him.

"Peter? Can you throw out the garbage please?" He was shaken out of his thoughts as Aunt May called for him to help with some chores.

Well, that was what Peter thought at least…

Previously, Toby had tried following the instructions on a popular baking show and failed miserably.

His "Artisan Brioche" did not turn out well….

To be exact, the bread that came out was not that picture-perfect, rectangular slices of fluffy goodness, instead, it was more…. Fruit cake-like?

Screw the euphemism, it looked, and tasted, like a rock, Toby could attest to that, it was the goblin's fault that he even had any experience to back up his claim.…

Skidding across the pavement headfirst is never a delightful experience.

Sort of irritated, Toby had decided to bring his wrath on the poor unsuspecting ducks that believed that they were in for another late morning snack.

As for the garbage, they were all recyclable waste, which he could bring into the recycling plant to get some free cash.

Though he could make some money off technology and other advancements, it was not really Toby's thing.

Rather, staying in the dark was more convenient, with fewer fangirls and fanboys, no Twitter cancellations, and best of all, no one-eyed creep's cornering him anywhere.

Back to present….

The amount of terrorist present seemed to have increased a lot.

"It'll definitely be more than they can handle."

Having hidden the golf cart in a random crag somewhere, Toby crouched, on a small steep, looking down upon them. Adjusting the turtle mask, he yanked his hood so it covered part of the mask.

Then, he could hear it, approaching, from a few miles, was the escort group which held the vodka-chugging playboy.

His spider-senses were a little peculiar, being able to somehow sense movement from miles away, hear minuscule sounds in the middle of a rock concert, and a lot of sort of scuffed things that should definitely be nerfed….

Other Spidermen, or women, or whatever, Pig? Had nothing on Toby.

POV Change

Tony was still sort of annoyed. As he downed another pint of that strong Russian vodka, he complained loudly about chihuahuas and whatnot.

"Some imbecile actually dared insult me in that way!"

"Wonder who got the guts, I'll beat the living crap out of them if I ever see them again."

"I don't even have a husband!"

At this point, the American soldiers were sort of sweating at this point.

They knew that Tony Stark had a rotten reputation for, being a complete scumbag, but they had not heard of his…. Alcoholic tendencies…..

(A/N: On a whim, now Tony is a drunkard….. Yay for AU...)

Toby took out his camera, ready to shoot whenever. He would send the more practical photo's to the Bugle and ask for a pay raise while posting the funnier ones on social media.

"I sort of feel bad for the poor soldiers who had to escort this guy so I might as well be a "hero" for a bit."

Soon, the car drove down the rough desert road. Directly above them, the sun glinted against the car window, which did help make the ambush easier. The terrorists were smarter than he credited them for….

Stretching his feet out, he plopped down, ready for the entertainment to come….


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