Chapter 2: Chapter 2
Pam slurs, “Whuz go in ear?” Obviously she has had too much to drink already today. Mimosas for breakfast again. Wine before lunch. Pam likes to drink. No, Pam lovesto drink, and has a problem drinking, but has never done anything about it. And nor has her family done anything about it, sending her to rehab.
Looking up from the invitation, studying his future mother-in-law as she blocks the kitchen, Sandy asks Jonah, “What did she say?”
Jonah translates, “She asked us what’s going on in here?”
“It’s only noon. Is she drunk already?”
“I’m afraid so. Stress of the holiday does this to her. She tends to drink more than usual.” Jonah releases his palm from Sandy’s back and decides to save Pam. “I’ll take her upstairs for a nap.”
“I dun nap. No lush.”
Jonah’s in no mood to get into an argument with her, or with Sandy. He says over his right shoulder to Sandy, “I’ll just be a few seconds. Make up some coffee. Add a splash of brandy in each. I think we both need a lift after seeing that the wrong invitations were mailed out to some of the guests.”
Shaking his head, disgusted, Sandy says. “I thought your brother-in-law was kidding when he said some of the invites were pink. Bobo loves to joke around. He’s such a character all the time.”
“Not this time. He was dead serious. We should have believed him.”
“Wait until I get a hold of Cookie Coke. I’ll burn her at the stake for this. I’ll throttle her neck with both hands. We paid her thousands to plan this function. These invites are unacceptable the way they turned out. She’s going to get the wrath of me and—”
Exiting the kitchen with Pam at his side, Jonah reminds Sandy over his right shoulder, “Coffee with brandy and cream, sweetheart,” and keeps walking. 2: Bobo’s Lost Cause and Jonah’s Task
Once Jonah returns to the kitchen and sits across from his lover at the small table that sits four comfortably, but cramps six, Sandy serves them the requested coffee. “Your mother changed the color of the walls in here.”
“Bobo did.”
“The split-pea green isn’t working. It looks like something out of the Exorcist. I liked the white better.”
“Willa wanted a god-awful peach. Bobo refused. He said peaches make his balls itchy.”
“Mother insisted on green,” Jonah says.
Rolling his eyes, Sandy says, “It looks like vomit. I’m getting sick by just the sight of it.”
Robert “Bobo” Bobowski, Willa’s husband, and Jonah’s brother-in-law, enters the kitchen through the back door. The man passes as a model-beautiful house with no furniture. He stands at six-two with bottle-blond hair and has deep brown eyes. Bobo teaches health and gym at Channing High School. He also assists Coach Fred Dale with the Channing Chargers wrestling team this fall/winter semester. Most think Bobo a total imbecile/dipshit, but extremely beefy, extremely hot, and fun to have around; a jester of sorts, or a fool, and loveable.
Both Jonah and Sandy know that Bobo has had four affairs on Willa in the last three years, unintentionally, of course. Bobo’s bisexual and suffers from a rare condition called hypersexuality. He has an increased libido. It’s related to his bipolar syndrome, which he takes a prescription for. Bobo can’t control his sexual urges, dick, and lately his bottom. Poor thing is always caught with his pants down, literally. Willa handles this well, though, understanding her husband’s brain and how it doesn’t function like a normalsexualbrain. She watches him closely, keeping her marriage intact, and Bobo’s attention in check, preventing him from sleeping with every Jane, Dick, Harry, Marty, Mary, Scott, Sylvia, Dillion, Ricky, Rachael, or football team, and whomever else. Praise Willa. How she does it, Jonah will never know or understand.
Willa Icicle: she’s twenty-nine and has been married to Bobo for the last seven years. She’s intelligent with a capital I and doesn’t take anyone’s bullshit, including Pam’s. Everyone in the Icicle family is pretty sure she married Bobo for his good looks and his Pumps Gym body. Obviously, she hasn’t committed her heart to him because of his brain. Every member of the Icicles is very much aware that Bobo isn’t the sharpest knife in the drawer; Willa’s at the top of this list.
In the last six months she’s taken up cooking, specifically a class called the Art of American Cuisinedown at the Culinary Institute of West End. The class meets three evenings a week. The sessions are two hours each. Twelve students take the course and she is walked through such dishes as Louisiana gumbo, chicken with saffron mash, bean and broccoli in black bean sauce, and mussels in white wine. Although Willa loves to cook, she’s still as thin as a rail and doesn’t eat much.
Gifts
-- Gift
received Weekly Power Status
-- Power
Ranking 
-- Power
stone