Chapter 39: Chūnin Exams (XIX).
"Why aren't you sleeping?"
Yukio flinched at the sudden intrusion but didn't turn around when Anko sat down next to him. "I'm just not tired, I guess..."
She hummed. "So instead you're doing... what exactly? Keeping watch in case Hokage-sama's ANBU guards miss something?"
"Hey, you never know," he said with a quiet laugh. "You will not find it ridiculous when I save you from being killed in your sleep because you mindlessly trusted others to protect you."
"If that ever happens, I will apologize for ever doubting you."
After that, they stayed silent for several minutes, simply enjoying the peaceful atmosphere of the sleeping forest around them. It was a starless night with even the moon hidden behind clouds, making the distant campfire the only source of light. However, as far as they were away from it at the moment, it could just as well be non-existent.
"Do you want to tell me what's really keeping you awake?"
He was honestly surprised that she had waited as long as she did before she asked him. While Anko could be patient when she needed to, she preferred to simply dash ahead and worry about the consequences of her actions later.
"Will you do me the same favour if I do?"
"Maybe."
That was probably the best he could hope for, he thought with a chuckle. "I think... I think I might be a little depressed."
When Anko answered, her voice was gentler than he had ever heard it before. "Because you lost your first fight during the tournament."
It was a statement, not a question.
"Yes."
He was glad she didn't press him to continue, giving him the time to think of the right words.
It had been clear from the beginning that he would lose that fight and he hadn't lied to himself that it would be any different. He had known that it would happen and made his peace with it. Now, in hindsight, he thought that might have been a mistake. After all, if you went into battle convinced you would lose, there was no chance of it ending any other way. Even if your enemy was inferior to you, you would still get defeated because your mind was already set on that outcome. In short, you were your own worst enemy.
"You didn't fight to win but to give your team as much insight into the capabilities of an enemy as possible. You saw the greater picture and acted according to that without hesitation."
That was what the Sandaime had said. It was the truth, sure, but it didn't make him feel much better. Yes, he had sacrificed himself in an (failed) attempt to give his teammates some information about their enemy, but so what? This wasn't a real battlefield, so even if his plan had worked as intended, his 'sacrifice' wouldn't have been for anything important. He wouldn't have saved his friend's lives, wouldn't have gained important information that would protect his home, wouldn't have done anything impressive at all.
Yukio knew the true purpose of those exams, of course, so it could be argued that he would have aided his teammates in representing Konoha, but he just didn't feel it that way!
"It's just... I thought I could do more than that, you know?" he finally said. "It's not just that I have lost, but also the manner of how I lost! I know I'm not a genius or even overly talented, not like you or Itachi, but to see the difference between her and myself... it's crushing."
He felt similar every time he trained with Itachi and saw how advanced the other boy was even though he was barely half his age. But at least they were teammates, friends. Training with him, as much as the difference in strength bothered him at times, at least benefited him and made him stronger as well. His last loss, however, only taught him how great the distance to the top truly was.
"I understand."
His first instinct was to disagree, to remind her how talented she was compared to someone like him, but he kept his mouth shut when he recognized the emotions in her voice. That must be the first time I have ever heard her sound so downcast.
"I knew I would lose the same way you knew it as well. She and I... we were on completely different levels, that much was clear from the beginning. I entered the arena hoping to do as much harm to her as I could to help Itachi and maybe get her to show some of her aces." She chuckled. "But you know what? When she actually stood in front of me, when I could look into her eyes and saw the absolute confidence of victory in them, I wanted to win. I really, really wanted to win."
He snorted before he could stop herself.
"What's so funny about that?" She sounded defensive now, maybe even a little bit hurt.
"Nothing, nothing, it's just, well," He scratched the back of his head. "Only a few minutes ago, I thought how it was a mistake that I went into the fight without any real intention of actually winning, only planning to make her show her strength as much as possible before I get knocked out. I guess I find it fitting that you wouldn't make the same mistake."
Now it was her turn to snort. "And see what a fat lot of good it did for me."
"That's not the point, though," he said. "You went into battle with the intention to win while I went into it with the intention to lose. If that doesn't show the difference between the two of us, then I don't know either."
Yukio wasn't truly surprised by that. Anko had always been the most energetic person he had ever met, never backing down from a challenge or giving up when she came face to face with insurmountable odds. Even if her words said otherwise, she always rushed into battle with the full intention to win.
There were another few minutes of silence before Anko spoke up once again. "So, what are you going to do when we are back in Konoha?"
He sighed. "I'm not sure yet. I guess I will take it slow for a while, maybe sign up for guard duty until I found an answer."
His parents, for all that they were fully supportive of his chosen career path, would be happy if he were to take it slow for a bit. They never said it to his face, but he had heard them talk when they thought he was either not there or asleep. Like many other civilians, they looked up to the shinobi as long as they didn't have loved ones who were one. If they did, they would suddenly remember all the dangers associated with that profession and wish for their friends and loved ones to not be a part of that "vile field of work".
Instead of saying that, however, he turned the question back at her. "What about you? The Anko I know wouldn't just accept her loss like that and then don't do anything about it."
That brought a genuine laugh out of her. "I have an idea, but I'm not sure about it yet. It would be kind of a big step and I would need Hokage-sama's permission before even attempting it..."
He waited for her to elaborate further but didn't press for more when she didn't. Still, he wondered what it could possibly be that she thought about when she needed the permission of the Sandaime for it. To warrant something like that, it was either very, very dangerous or very, very forbidden. Possibly even both.
It was also typically Anko. He could still remember how she pressed Orochimaru to teach her his snake techniques, no matter how often she was told off by him. Even the threat of being eaten alive by the snakes if they found her to be an unworthy summoner didn't slow her down as much as a single second, quite the opposite actually. If there was one constant thing in the world, then it was that Anko loved dangerous things and wanted them for her own if somehow possible.
"Well, just tell me if I can help you in any way. That's what a team is there for, isn't it?"
Talking with her had definitively helped him get some of the weight off his chest, so doing the same for her was the least he could do.
The smile she gave him wasn't her usual big and feral one, but it was nonetheless bright. "Of course, you will be the first I tell if I go through with it."
....
Konoha was generally considered to be the strongest of the Five Great Nations, he knew that. And honestly, he couldn't really deny that there was some truth to it. They had come out on top of every war since the creation of the village system, after all.
Rasa was also familiar with their staggering and ever so annoying trend of producing unnatural talented shinobi.
That being said, this had been the first time that he had actually come face to face with one such prodigious child while they were still young. It was one thing to know what people like Kakashi Hatake or Orochimaru were able to do at a young age, but it was something else entirely to see a seven years old go toe to toe with a Jinchūriki. Yes, he still lost in the end, no matter that the 'official' result was a draw, but to even get that far...
It wasn't just him, but his teammates as well. While the boy was at best slightly above average, the girl showed impressive skills as well. Not on the same level as the Uchiha, but still very impressive.
For all that he hated to admit it, Konoha's youth was superior to Suna's. Not only had they still not recovered from the last war, but they also suffered a drought recently that killed a great number of people. It was not a long drought, meaning the number of deaths were manageable, but it was a blow nonetheless. And then there was Sasori's defection...
It seemed it would be wise to strengthen his ties with Konoha. There were already peace negotiations going on, but until now, he hadn't wanted to develop too close relationships with any village because that could antagonize others. That would change now.
Better to have one close and reliable ally than several unreliable.
.....
Damn Konoha and their stupid wonder children!
It became more and more frustrating the more Oonoki thought about it. Before the exams, he had thought things were proceeding great; his village was rebuilding and regaining its strength unexpectedly fast, there were several very promising youths that would become strong shinobi one day, and the relationship with most of his neighbours was good. And that wasn't even the end of it!
Konoha, his village's greatest and most hated enemy, suffered one blow after another. First, their Yondaime died -hah, serves that bastard right!- during the attack of the Nine-Tails which also killed a good number of the village. Then, Orochimaru, one of their strongest shinobi, defected, which meant that there was only one of the Sannin left to worry about. It was as if Kami decided that Konoha had too much luck over the last few decades and finally stepped in to change that.
As things turned out, that wasn't the case, for there was already a new prodigy, and an Uchiha as well. That damn clan was annoying enough as it was, but now they had another wonder child aside of Shisui no Shunshin! How was it fair that they got another one?
Pah, he thought. Whatever. He's still young, so there will be more than enough opportunities for him to die. And even if not, well, child prodigies tend to burn out quickly enough most of the time.
Even if you had to apply a little push now and then to let it happen.
Well, at least the boy shut that damn Raikage up. Bringing a Jinchūriki that can't even control its powers to the Chūnin Exams, really, I have no idea what went through his head...
CREATORS' THOUGHTS 
Darker_Than_Black
Darker_Than_Black This is the last chapter of this arc.
I hope you enjoyed this arc as much as me.
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