Chapter 18: Piscem natare doces
A/N: Might wanna google the title ngl. ;)
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[A few hours later]
Eager to start the day and finally learn under a trained wizard, I quickly dressed myself for the occasion. Rushing down to the room, guided along by Ephyl.
I zoomed through the door, seeing the whole place transformed to fit the practice of magic.
I saw the stone tiled floors, covered in a faint solder of white alabaster. The roof and walls brushed with a thin layer of white varnish. The room seemed empty, devoid of everything.
The empty space only housed one simple wooden chair, arranged at the center of the place, surrounded by the white room. Ivan waited beside the chair, his fingers restlessly tapping away at the wooden brace.
As I burst into the room, he turned to face me.
"Welcome, I honestly expected you to arrive later."
"I just didn't want to waste a single second."
"Remarkable, now then... take a seat", he patted the chair, unsheathing his wand.
I followed through, and then he flicked his wand, sealing the door, isolating us inside.
The color slowly drained from the room, everything siphoned away. Only nothingness remained. The void completely colored white. A blank space, he and I remained in the center.
"It is said, if a man were to live in nothingness, his mind would crumble, in a matter of days." Ivan whispered.
"You wish to learn many things, but I will only teach you one. A jack of all trades, is a master of none. Choose carefully, and establish a solid foundation for your own future." He preached.
I knew there was always a catch. But to only choose one, it irked me. I delved deep into my thoughts.
These few weeks had been a learning experience. However, for an odd reason, I couldn't forget what happened on my first stay here. Nosferat fiddled with my head, and I fumbled miserably.
I didn't blame myself. Comparing myself to him was wishful thinking in the first place. But I wanted control. To ensure that no such thing ever happened again. Occlumency. That was one solution, to defend my mind against attacks. In contrast, I could go the offense.
Legillimancy.. I had a natural gift, and to decide between the two was hard. In the end... learning something I was proficient in, was naturally easier than something entirely alien to me.
"Legillimancy, teach me legillimancy" I requested.
Ivan stroked his furrowed brows.
"Unfortunately, I cannot do that, or rather its best if I do not" he showed a helpless smile.
"You mean to go against your word?" I questioned, annoyed at this outcome.
"Do not misinterpret my intentions. I know you're a natural. To sully your own perspective by alluding to my own. It would only serve to hinder your future."
I raised my eyebrows, quite flabbergasted at his words.
He saw me cluelessly listening on and proceed to clarify.
"Tell me, would you teach a fish to swim?" he said, an obvious smirk on his face.
"I understand", nodding along to his words. I treated my natural born talent, as a gift. But he worded it akin to an intrinsic skill, one I could develop on my own.
"Then Occlumency", if not offense, I wanted a strong defense. Either way, the mind arts were a crucial skill to master.
"An excellent choice, occlumency serves as the foundation of self control, efficiency and intellect. If you manage to make significant progress, it wouldn't be impossible to influence other aspects of your magic"
However, for a split second, he narrowed his eyes.
"Before we begin, I must test your mind to understand it's state. " Ivan whisked his wand.
My arms were bound to the chair, and the wood clamped around my legs. Rendering me incapable of movement.
"Prepare yourself, try your best to defend your mind, you might feel a slight prick around your head, endure it." Ivan cautioned, as his wand rested above my forehead.
I gulped back the anxiety, and focused wholly on preserving my sanity. Having somewhat experienced a mind attack, I tried to organize my thoughts against any strange sensation.
As soon as I nodded my head in affirmation, I felt an irritable jolt through my mind.
It was akin to a hundred ants crawling on my head. Discomforting, nauseating and unnerving. I wouldn't word it any other way.
It felt like someone scratching the very folds of my brain. Scraping their nails through the bends, sending my thoughts into disarray. I couldn't stay composed for long, in a matter of seconds, I lost any semblance of reasoning.
Seeing my reaction, Ivan snapped me out of my delusions.
"Typically, the targets remain unaware of any tampering, seemingly they just feel slight pain. However, I see that you are quite sensitive to attacks. It is rather a double edged sword. You can definitely identify them, but that amplifies their pain. You feel them on a deeper scale, a much more physical pain."
I panted for breaths, my palms lathered with sweat.
"I thought this was going to be an easy lesson?" I questioned. The pain I felt was unrealistic. There was no way I could go through that process again.
"This type of probing would normally not leave behind such a huge trace. Unfortunately, we have no choice but to continue. The first step in occlumency, is to be aware of your mind. Understand its presence. As humans, we instinctively protect ourselves on the brink of death. You must grasp the intricacies as I attack you. Try to defend with your life on the line. I am sure, it is great motivation."
He snickered. Clearly, he was enjoying it. But in a sense he was right. When he attacked me, I did feel as though my mind tried to subconsciously interrupt his flow. I simply could not follow along.
"I shall attack you repeatedly, until you have the basics down."
Ivan and I, continued this tug of war, hoping to feel control over my mind. His attacks lasted merely a few seconds, in an effort to not render me unconscious.
After about ten tries, I felt a hidden reflex bloom in my mind. Like unfolding a numbed limb. I could control my abilities to a certain extent.
Ivan noticed this, and prepared a final attack. Aiming to consolidate my intuition.
Once more, I felt the same jolt zap through my head. However, I could retaliate freely. My mind solidified facing the external force, and I started to expel his magic.
"That's right, focus your mind, scatter your thoughts. Envision a wall, that no man can overcome. Your mind must be an impenetrable fortress. Conquer your mind, for a man who understands himself, conquers his enemies." Ivan rejoiced.
After I finished the first phase of training, Ivan did ramble on about some techniques and methods to think about for defense. But quite frankly, I was too sapped to care, I headed out towards the dining hall, hoping to catch a few leftovers from breakfast.
The training was cumbersome. I could tell I was decent at Occlumency. But my forte was still Legillimancy. The mind arts weren't easy to master, the effort was frankly exhausting.
Just a few minutes of training resulted in my mind feeling weak and weary. However, if I continued this training for a few more days, I could develop my defense skills.
Nothing too impressive, just enough to safeguard my thoughts from prying eyes. Only from those at an amateur level at best. To branch out into the subsidiaries of occlumency....
Well that was a task for another day. Once I move past the basics, I would learn how to utilize occlumency to improve my own thinking. Eventually, choosing to focus on one aspect of it for the time being. I hadn't decided which, but I had a faint idea.
As for legilimancy... Ivan had no intentions to "sully" my gifted outlook on scouring minds. Unfortunately, that meant I had to figure out a way to improve, practically alone. Well it wasn't really what I had expected.
I couldn't quite begin legillimancy training alone.... Who would I practice on? Whose mind would I invade?
Logically, I could just ask Ivan to play as my target. But I suppose that choice had its own difficulties. Dealing with his mind, I tried it before. But it was like staring at a brick wall. No openings whatsoever.
Unless he was willing to cooperate and lower his barriers, I wouldn't quite get anything out of it. But I could piece together, that he wasn't too keen on being read. It goes without saying, no one really is.
Considering his personality? Ivan wouldn't "lower his guard" in any situation. Perhaps, I would just have to figure this out later.
Right now,....I had more pressing matters to attend to. I could feel a sour ache in the pit of my stomach. Rushing out to Ephyl, I simply requested he whip up some quick breakfast and started patiently waiting to gobble it down.
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Ivan fiddled with a quaint quill, and began inscribing a letter on loose paper. The contents were quite scrambled and encrypted, as he marked down the date and signed the bottom of the page. An indecipherable pattern, emerged on the letter, and the paper folded itself to fit inside an enchanted envelop laying beside it.
Ivan glanced at the envelope, making sure no abnormalities existed within the protocols. He was currently in his guest room, one prepared for a temporary stay.
Ivan was tasked with sending back reports of any occurrence or progress. Naturally, these reports could not fall into the wrong hands. Hence, the many precautions he had taken into safely binding the letter. Going as far as to write it in code.
He grasped the envelope within his hands, running his fingers through the edges, smoothening them out. Nothing particular, perhaps just his own superstitions. He had stoked some small logs in the fireplace inside his room. It wasn't effective for warmth, but that wasn't his intention in the first place.
Crouching beside the stifling charcoal, Ivan chucked the letter into the fiery mess. The letter charred in the fire, but not due to burning. Slowly, it turned to ash, crumbling to pieces, as a few embers wisped away.
He continued stoking the flame for a few seconds, erasing any evidence of what just happened. Eventually, he blew out the fire, a faint gray smoke filled the chimney lungs, as the wind twirled the smoke to spirals, shifting it away.
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