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[If you are listening to this you have either gone insane or found this file by mistake but truly this is my last testimony of my life. I'm trying my best to keep my sanity intact before he takes over again so please forgive me if my story is short. I only have three slots for my past to be revealed so I hope that you understand since the story of my life it's not for the faint of heart and it was honestly my death…. To make it short this all started with….]
A Lie, A word that means to make an untrue statement with intent to deceive…..
My name was once Devine Robinson and for many years now the word lie has stuck in my head for so long that it was hard for me to think straight without depression manipulating my thoughts. Even after everything that I've been through because of one girl who has become a devious woman… Now I have become something even more dangerous than she was in the year 2014.
"REWIND"
Ever since my brain could begin to function, I've always been that hyperactive half black half korean child that always wanted to show the world's what kind of kid I was either in the way of acting as someone else or hiding in their shadow in the way of mimicking them just to be funny. No matter how hard things got in life for me either at home or at school or just seeing A lamp be smashed into my mothers face by my brothers father I always try to have a smile on my face even despite my bipolar disorder that caused me to lash out or become very defensive with others around me who didn't understand, it only got worse when my disability came up into conversations where my mother would treat me like a meal ticket and a excuse to blame certain things on me. I feel broken many times in my life because of people but I always try to bounce back or out-think them to make any situation make me feel better about myself even if deep down inside I wanted to watch the world burn for the way that they stared at me or laughed at me…..
The years went by in a CrazY household with one brother and one sister by two different fathers, it was apparent that I would ask questions about things that we're out of my control or out of my reach. The question started when I remembered one time when I was young and I tried to hug (who I thought was my grandmother) Amy but she pushed me away and told me that I was not her grandson…. That was the first lie that I had to find out from my family and not for my mom. I made more mistakes with the fact that I didn't have my father Abe much in my life and the only time he was there on my school breaks or holidays where I went to see him.
Besides the lies from my family came in the form of my own so-called friends. I've gotten the "Want to hang out at my house?" Just to be pushed around or treated like crap, offered something from someone expecting something in return, borrowing toys just for those that I trusted would just break mine out of jealousy then be told "I'm sorry that I broke your toy but your mom can buy you a new one, right?" The sad part about it is the fact that out of all of them, my favorite toy was licked so that they could keep it….. The people I called my friends would slowly either become distant when I had nothing to offer like trying to fight their battles for them or pay for their food so they would ignore me when I wasn't having fun anymore. When I fractured my skull or broke my ankle, my smile slowly faded and rings around my eyes from stress or formation. Each passing year I was scratching at my skin and popping zits on my face because of all of it, I can assure you reader I am no saint to where I have learned things because of my mother's lust and behavior, I rub people inappropriately to where schools were afraid of having me even though they never questioned my mom they only questioned me, never once did they look past a smile and innocent eyes...
All they saw was a boy with a messed up mind ever since I pushed a girl down a pathway when she was in a wheelchair even after I tried to be friendly but they didn't see me as a friend, only a weirdo or an idiot….. Maybe my mind was already broken and it just needed time to simmer, later I found out that she died from hitting a few pipes on the way down but trust me ladies and gentlemen whoever is reading this she did not let that go to go without me having to do something in return, her ghost made me take her body to the full moon and she had never seen one before since most of her life has been in a wheelchair. Truly thinking back on it I feel even worse for the fact that I put that poor girl through so much pain when she was already struggling to begin with. I wanted to know more but I couldn't even speak correctly because I was illiterate…. Everything that came out of my head was nonsense and slowly but surely after the day I became more knowledgeable you may say...
Whatever the reason for the miracle, I felt more love from a belt or wire or hanger than I did from my own mom, sure I got the newest systems and I got clothes from my dad Who was living the bachelor life but when it came to my mom all I wanted to do was be with my dad, I saw what it would be like with him but she constantly told me that it would be hard for me to coexist. Been with my mom for so long….. I later found out what you meant by that…..
To put it blankley, Elementary School called me a retarded pervert while being misunderstood because of my home life thinking that it was all me with no repercussions for my parents to find out what was going on on the other side of the fence since people a.k.a. teachers didn't care about that all they cared about was getting a Christmas bonus on top of the fact that there were mutated children that I could only see which made matters dire…. I was the only one that survived that debacle that was known as the elementary school massacre since I was one of the only kids who was able to see a murderous girl who killed many which sent me to a children's psych ward, then there was the incident where a murderous group of students happened in middle school, when defending myself against them I was called a retarded sociopath and High School just calls me something worse then what my own therapist would call me after hearing from others and not for me....
Throughout my life after dealing with so many people that have hurt me or tried to understand me but were forced to back away because of my defensive nature or fears of being hurt, there was always one person that I can hate without any mercy.
One person who didn't find me funny at all was when I was in my final teen years, her name was Fate Prudent…..
She accused me of r--e.....
Sadly enough this wasn't the first time…..
The first time was when she accused me of stalking her by deleting her messages or conversations that she had with me and then posting it where it would look like I was stalking. She tried to take that to the police but they could see past her crimes. But then when she decided to allow me to date her after three weeks she changed on Valentine's day, she accused me of assaulting her at school and at a graveyard. I could tell there was something going on but I couldn't put my finger on it….
This day was where I could tell that there were more people that were trying to take me down, because the graveyard story hit me like a ton of bricks when I remembered this girl who I dated less than a week in who had ghosted me. Her name was Sandy and she had her own problems at home as I could tell from the fact that she had bruises on her and didn't know much about dating at all. I didn't care about any of that in the beginning and when we were in a graveyard trying to, well let's just say that things became embarrassing when people saw us.
Funny enough she's the one who picked the area in the first place and it's even funnier when someone else is using said story to try and take me out of school….
Looking back on it I try to ask her if it was okay and not just jumped into having sex with someone that I consider a friend, like I said people saw the worst in me and never the best….. Unlike her parents, I was actually trying to be nice when she had no idea about how to test how to do anything besides run...
Well almost everyone there was playing the blaming game, this girl that I lost my virginity to who became my best friend and the only woman to have a miscarriage with my child…. We will call her Nale….
Nale was there for me through it all, I thought that I was going to be able to survive this…. It was only until the police ACTUALLY believed her….. All it took was the biggest lie about documents and folders about all the sexual experiences that made her head when all I had was one... bout In front of people she cried from what everyone believed but behind their back she would give a Cheshire Cat-like smile as if she had won, I was taken to the police station.
[4 Hours Later]
I was at the police station wearing a towel over my head to not show the tears in my eyes along with the swollen blackeye that was a gift from a police officer who had to take out some frustration. You see, the police officer happened to be Fate's father so he roughly beat the shit out of me in the interrogation room without anyone trying to stop him. Once they were done they set me in front, put things into my nose and mouth so I would be able to talk and look at least a bit healthy compared to the fact that I felt like my skull was fractured. My mother soon came as everyone saw a smiling woman before them but I could tell that she was bottling up all her anger and frustration....
"We are sorry to contact you ma'am but your son has been accused of assaulting a woman at his school and he became quite hostile. Officer Roberts tried talking to him but it seems he doesn't want to talk to us so we thought that maybe-" The cop explained but the woman turned out to be my mother and she had already dealt with me many times before but this was beyond so she cut the man off.
"Is he free to go?" My mother said in a intimidating voice as she had questions that not even the police man could answer, all he could say was:
"We are doing the best we can by the looks of it. He'll probably be sent to jail."
It was until the police officer said these words that sent chills down my spine as I could tell there was something wrong with this man as it was not normal. "Until the situation is taken care of we ask that you keep your son under complete house arrest as we will make sure that he gets home and court hearings." The cop said before being given by one of his fellow officers a leg brace.
I shook my head repeatedly not wanting to have that on me, it was only until the police officer warned me about choices while grabbing onto my leg tightly. "Listen to me, there are two options that you can have at this moment. You can either allow me to put this brace on your leg and go home or be sent to A psych ward for 3 months before being sent to jail?…. By the look of it I can tell that you have been there before."
My thoughts on the last time I was placed in the mental institution within slum town, there was barely any food, they would fire hose the individuals like animals for showers, kill those who break the rules then make up a lie to cover it up, especially sexually assaulting those who are way too far gone including the use of drugs to make individuals more docile…..
I let the officer put a brace on his leg where a bruise was made by the officer.
"You made the right choice." The officer said before bringing the young man in for a bear hug but he was really trying to whisper in his ear. "I know personally that a slum town's mental institution just loves your type, you could be beaten up and tricked into doing their dirty work or just mess around and kill pieces of shit like you without any form of worry." The officer said before slowly licking around my ear without my mother knowing, soon the officer let me go while making it seem like nothing happened and slapped me on the ass forward to get going which truly made me feel uncomfortable.
"Don't get into any trouble tonight because after all we are going to be working together for the time being until you have to go to court." The officer said with a smile on his face that honestly looked sinister to me, actually feeling like I had to be VERY careful around this officer along with Officer Robert who was watching the entire time.
Before I knew it, I was taken by the back of my neck by my mother's strong hand and dragged me out of the police station with these words to the officers. "Don't worry officer, I will take care of her now and we will definitely have a serious conversation once we get home."
This story was based on passed experiences and life choices
Maddøx is sane at first but still kinda crazy.