Chapter 5: Misconceptions
I was just about to open my mouth and change the subject, when I heard his voice. It sounded low and somehow soothing, like a flow of warm water.
"It's not the first time someone has told me I do not look like a bookworm. In reality, though, I have always loved books. My parents were teachers. They both taught Literature. My mom worked at a middle school, while my dad had a post at a high school. They were both obsessed with books and loved to read. At home, we had an entire room filled with shelves upon shelves of books.
With this kind of environment while growing up, one can easily imagine that I was influenced by them to a certain degree. However, I was also an active child, wanting to go out and play with friends, doing sports and just mess around. But on rainy days, or when I was tired, I would always prefer to sit in bed with a book in my hands and read the hours away."
Eh? This is rather surprising. I admit I never would have imagined Kurosawa-san to have such an intellectual background. Nor such a preference for the quietude of reading.
"Have you ever thought about starting to write your own stories?" I asked, suddenly curious whether he had the same feelings as me back then.
"No, I always preferred reading over writing. After devouring enough novels, I began to take an interest in reviewing and editing. I think it takes a whole lot of imagination to create something from nothing and I didn't believe I had that talent."
"I see." I nodded slowly. Indeed, not many people are able to write, and even if they are, it's not always guaranteed that they have the talent for it. "Is that how you ended up working for Suzumori Publishing?" I continued asking.
"Before I finished high school things changed at home, and later I almost didn't get to enter college."
Kurosawa-san lowered his head, staring at the can of beer in his hand for a while before speaking. His expression looked pained, but he still continued to tell me his story.
"Somehow, I ended up going to a local college. During that time, I worked for local newspapers, writing articles for magazines, even doing translations. I also did a few night shifts at convenience stores and bars that paid relatively well. After graduation I got a part-time job at a small publishing company where I mainly did odd jobs and labor work.
It took me over a year to get a full-time post there and be able to take on an editing task. But it was all worth it. During the beginner's year I was able to familiarize myself with what it meant to work in a publishing company and, therefore, it was easier to do my job afterwards. Since then, I've worked for two companies, the last one being a small branch of Suzumori publishing, until I was finally transferred here to the main company."
"Sounds like a rough journey."
"It was, but that's how life is." He said simply, without any pretense. "It doesn't always give you sunny days. That's why we have to cherish the ones we get, so that we can get through the storms."
"How poetic." I chuckled despite myself. "And you say you don't have a talent for writing."
"Yeah, yeah. You should feel lucky I didn't follow this path, otherwise we would have been rivals." He grinned, smacking his chest with a prideful look. Then, he raised his hand holding the beer and bumped it against mine. "How about you, Masato-sensei? How was your journey here?"
For a while I didn't know how I should answer him. After hearing his story, I felt slightly compelled to be honest with him. I thought that, perhaps if it was this person, I might finally be able to openly say what was inside my heart. I guess his straightforwardness was beginning to rub off on me.
Thus, I opened my mouth and directly poured out everything I had been keeping hidden.
"When I was in middle school I got into an accident and ended up spending one year in a coma. When I woke up, I realized I could hear people's thoughts. At first, I thought it was a problem with my brain so I went and saw a neurologist. However, it didn't appear to be a physical issue.
Therefore, I went to a psychiatrist, but that didn't work out well either. Nothing I did made the situation better so I eventually tried getting used to it. I wanted to avoid troublesome situations, so I began to keep a safe distance from other people and engrossed myself in reading. Soon, I became interested in writing and that's how I ended up here."
I stopped here and glanced up at him, waiting to see his reaction. Whether he would start laughing and calling me crazy, or shake his head believing I was mocking him, I wanted to see how Kurosawa-san would take this information.
To my utter surprise, he didn't seem affected one bit. He simply held his beer and looked at me earnestly. Seeing how I was reluctant to continue, he simply tilted his head slightly and waited. The gesture immediately made me think of a large dog looking curiously at someone.
I had to try and swallow back my laughter.
"Hmm, so that's why you've hauled yourself inside your house, refusing to go out if you could avoid it?" he finally asked after a while.
"I have been keeping a proper distance from social interaction." I pointed out.
"That's just a fancy way of putting it." Kurosawa-san scoffed, downing his beer. "In the end, it still means that you've isolated yourself from everyone else."
"Say it however you will."
"Honestly, for such a smart fellow you can be quite stupid sometimes." Kurosawa-san chuckled into his beer can.
Normally I would have gotten angry at him calling me stupid, but, oddly enough, that time I didn't find it annoying. Compared to others who have judged my way of life, Kurosawa-san didn't sound patronizing. His brutal honesty was actually very refreshing. I found myself smiling thinking about things from the past.
Like how my friends found it too much to be around me when they realized I knew their real thoughts about me; or how my only girlfriend went out with me just to piss off another guy while thinking I was good looking but rather weird; or how my high school colleagues always thought I did well in exams because I read the teachers' minds and knew the subjects beforehand; even the teachers kept having doubts about me.
Things went on like this until it had gotten to the point that people and me would mutually avoid each other. My family was the only exception, but I guess I can't do anything about that. Tragic stories are everywhere.
"What would you do if you had this ability, Kurosawa-san?" I asked, suddenly struck by a curious thought.
What would this person, who is usually honest and straightforward to a fault, do if he had the chance to read people's minds? Would he use it for his own benefit, or just like me, he would hide away from the world?
I turned to look at him and saw Kurosawa-san gazing at me with a thoughtful expression. His eyes were narrowed and his forehead was creased.
After a couple of minutes, he finally opened his mouth to give me a reply.
"I would beat the crap out of everyone who insulted me in their heads."
What he said absolutely stunned me, rendering me speechless for a whole minute, before I finally couldn't hold it in anymore and I burst out laughing. Truly, this person really was something special. No matter how hard I tried, I could never understand him.
I patted his shoulder and, as expected, I couldn't hear anything. I wondered, will I ever know what this person is truly thinking or will he forever remain a mystery?
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Raksha1
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