I was a most sincere and dedicated student at college. I soon earned the high reputation I had at the high school.The science and mathematics lecturers admired me a lot and cited my example to those boys who were wasting their valuable time going to the cinema and playing cricket. I was bossy and commanding at home. Mother was at my beck and call.I loved nothing except my studies.I loved the words of praise and encomiums the lecturers showered on me to the envy and jealousy of my classmates and their parents.I was 17 but I was too proud to befriend any girl.Many of them told me they needed my assistance to make out things in science and mathematics. I never thought of Inna she was a student there though.
The distance between the Science Block and the Arts Block was about half a kilometre.The vast college playground was situated between them. So there was no chance of any regular meetings between us.When any thought about her occurred to me,I told myself that I was poorer than others but much more intelligent than any of them. This kept me apart from many boys and girls who longed for my company.All the year round I toiled hard and persistently.Those days mother and her friends told me to refrain from so much constant hard work.Sometimes I would spend whole nights doing maths. This was very disagreeable to mother.Father was a silent witness only. He hardly said a word about my studies.He was happy that people were paying him special treatment for my extraordinary achievements in my studies.If someone said to him,"Jadu,you are a lucky man. Your son is a jewel...", he would simply give a faint smile and instantly keep quiet.
When first results of intermediate science annual examinations came out,I was overjoyed but when I pondered my score in English,I was struck with sadness that the cruel examiner had given me 71 marks out of hundred.This shattered my hopes to become the college topper. Eleven students were ahead of me when it came to the total score of marks in all subjects by intermediate science students in the college. I regretted a lot for having given less attention to the study of English. All my enemies from school who were now with me at college were rejoicing inwardly.Inna had become intermediate arts college topper.I was full of sorrow and remorse. I took a vow to master the English language at any cost.
Someone had told mother that I had got a first class and she was bubbling with feelings of rejoicing and father too was all smiles.When I reached home, father embraced me with tears in his eyes. Then mother came out and burst out into joyful tears. Both of them had expected me to make it to a first class and a first class I had got! I was irked and disgruntled.Although weavers by caste, my parents did no weaving work at all. They were farmers who were slightly educated and knew only a little about higher education.I didn't want to chill their enthusiasm and high spirits.But I was unable to make myself look cheerful.They were worried about my silence. When we reached the temple,they had already asked me if I was feeling unwell. I had emphatically told them I was not unwell. When the priest saw us,he bared his pan-stained teeth in an ugly smile. He was glad of the possible donation my mother was going to make to him. Mother usually gave him a twenty-rupee note without fail.That was a big sum considering his services.My parents told him about my success. He placed his hand on my head and blessed me saying something beyond my comprehension.They also complained to him about my upset mood and silence.The priest told them:
"Your son is no ordinary child...! He is an angel in human form.What does a tree loaded with fruit do? It bows down..The truly wise are always humble. They are indifferent to praise and blame.Just watch what he is going to do when he grows up into a man...! He is in disguise now.." My mother was very much scared thinking that I might renounce the world and become a monk...!" The priest then assuaged her fears and told her that I would be a top bureaucrat like Sana Mohanty's son.Mother Kali had told him about it many times...Father worried about the phrase "in disguise." All the while I was sitting and thinking about my bad score in the annual intermediate science examination.
My parents tipped the priest more than the usual amount.The thought of eleven students being ahead of me in the examination rankled with me painfully.
We came back home.I took my meals and fell asleep. When I got late in the afternoon I felt relaxed and the thought of the failure was sinking within me. I thought of what to do next.I thought of going to Cuttack and study graduation in science at Ravenshaw college.My goal was to study physics and mathematics.In the meanwhile,I recollected my auntie's selfish behaviour.My uncle was sweet and gentle but his wife would not want me to lodge with them to do my graduation at the college there.I remembered how once when I was playing my uncle's guitar she had told me I might damage it.She didn't like people from villages going to Cuttack and halting in her house.But my mother would boast:"Who is she? You will stay in my brother's house and study.We will send money to you regularly...She is squandering my brother's hard-earned money...! She is a bitch.
Yes,that is what she is...!You must go to a good college at Cuttack..."
I was so put down by my lagging behind eleven students that I decided to study in the local college again and complete my graduation in science. Many days elapsed and the day of admission into the graduate courses arrived. The boys were outside the admission counter and some girls were at the table the admission table of an officer who was taking the admission fees and some papers from the students. The boys were rough and violent and hence they had been told to make a queue outside and stand in it.Inside the admission hall the girls were standing in a long queue.I spotted Inna in the queue and she too caught sight of me standing in the queue outside along the veranda.We exchanged some meaningful glances for the first time.We never smiled at each other;we held our gaze for a long time.Quite silently and wordlessly we promised each other that we would hold our gaze in our forthcoming meetings.
And that actually happened.We smiled at each other;we wordlessly promised each other not to part ways.