Chapter 55: SHIZUN'S SACRIFICE
Following the altercation between Xue Meng and Mo Ran in Loyalty Hall on the day Chu Wanning died, Xue Meng expressly banished Mo Ran from coming close to Chu Wanning ever again. He was not allowed to mourn for his shizun in public, at least not when Xue Meng was around.
Not that Mo Ran insisted to kneel at Loyalty Hall and gaze at Chu Wanning's cold corpse. Ever since he found out that Chu Wanning saved his life, he had been feeling numb all over.
When he first woke up and found that he and Shi Mei both had survived the Heavenly Rift, he was ecstatic. He thought that he finally managed to overturn the cruel fate from his previous life and was finally able to walk away from the bloody path with Shi Mei by his side.
Who would have thought that Chu Wanning would be the one to die in this turn of events? Even worse, he had died not because of the Heavenly Rift itself but because he exhausted his body to save Mo Ran. As Mo Ran knelt there, he was aware that he owed every second of his life thereafter to the person who lay in the coffin. Every breath, every heartbeat was only there because Chu Wanning had paid for them with every single drop of blood that he shed on the stairs leading to Sisheng Peak.
Like a lost soul, Mo Ran walked down all the steps and watched the blood trail that sickered into the stone and colored it dark brown. Some places had larger stains. There were a few of them with small handprints. Mo Ran could almost see little Chu Wanning struggling under the weight of his disciple's body when he again transformed into Xia Sini's form and fell down.
Did it hurt?
It must have hurt so much.
But Chu Wanning did not give up. He stood up from every fall and carried Mo Ran with determination.
Mo Ran touched the little handprint and rubbed at it. How many times did he hold that little hand in the past? How many times did he hug his little shizun? And what did he say to him back then?
-"Don't be afraid, Shidi. I will protect you, alright?
Shizun will not be there for you, but I will. I will dote on you, and protect you always."
Ha.
Who would have thought that the person he accused of being heartless actually stood in front of him?
Who saved who in the end?
Who protected who?
-Why, Chu Wanning? Why?
-Why did you not just let me die?
The answer was clear to Mo Ran.
"Mark my words, little Shidi. This will happen again. And then, your Shizun, my Shizun, he will not save any of us just like Grandmaster Wu did not save his two disciples who were shielding the attacks for him."
Mo Ran buried his face in his hands.
-Chu Wanning, why must you care so much about my opinion. I never... I never wanted you to die. Is this your ultimate revenge? Did you want to prove that I was wrong, so you had to drag me back to Sisheng Peak at the cost of your own life?
-Chu Wanning, you...
Mo Ran slammed his fist against a nearby tree. The impact broke his knuckles, causing blood to spurt out and sicker down the trunk. And yet, he barely registered the pain. Mo Ran did not know what it was that he felt. He felt a lot of raging emotion in his heart but he could not put a name to it. He just knew that he had never been more miserable in his life.
Chu Wanning was not supposed to die during the Heavenly Rift. He was also not supposed to die in his previous life. If not because of Mo Ran, he would have lived much longer. He lost his life twice because of Mo Ran. In this lifetime when Mo Ran did not actively do anything to kill him, he still died in the end.
"Chu Wanning, why? Tell me, why?"
But Chu Wanning was no longer there to answer him. His cold body lay inside the Loyalty Hall and his soul had left the earth.
Mo Ran came back to the dormitory with a bleeding fist and met with Shi Mei, who had just come back from Loyalty Hall.
"A-Ran, your hand!" He cried in distress.
"Hm? Oh."
Shi Mei pulled at his arm and forced him to sit down while he cleaned and bandaged Mo Ran's hand.
"Shi Mei, Shizun... How is he?"
Shi Mei's lips trembled. How was he supposed to answer? Chu Wanning was already dead.
"Never mind," Mo Ran said before Shi Mei thought about an answer. He pressed his intact hand between his eyes.
"Never mind. Sorry."
"It's..."
Shi Mei could not continue. It was not okay. It would be wrong to say that it was okay. Shi Mei looked up at Mo Ran and squeezed his hand.
"A-Ran, um..."
Mo Ran gave him a tired look.
"What is it?"
"That... Do you remember that you wanted to tell me something a few nights ago? You asked me to wait for you..."
Mo Ran gaped at Shi Mei. His life had been split cleanly into two periods. The time before Chu Wanning's death and the time after Chu Wanning's death. The time before Chu Wanning's death was like a dream. In that dream, he was still happily planning to confess to Shi Mei. What about now? Could he still confess to Shi Mei?
Chu Wanning's stoical and aloof face kept coming back to haunt him.
Xia Sini's crying face kept appearing at the back of his head.
He could not.
Mo Ran shook his head.
"A-Ran...?"
"I am sorry. Shi Mei, not now. What I wanted to say is still the same. I just... I just can't do it right now."
There was a layer of frost covering Shi Mei's eyes when he heard Mo Ran's answer, but he quickly regained his composure and nodded with a smile.
"I understand."
The next day, there was a big ruckus at the Loyalty Hall.
Xue Zhengyong had to leave Sisheng Peak right after dropping Xuanji Elder in his residence to meet with the other sect leaders and took care of the aftermath of the heavenly rift. When he came back two days later, he was struck with the bad news of Chu Wanning's death right away. To make things worse, Xue Meng had refused to cooperate with other disciples who wanted to clean Chu Wanning up and prepare him for his burial.
The little phoenix clung to his Shizun and kept passing Chu Wanning spiritual power to preserve his corpse. He did not care about what happened to himself. Xue Zhengyong had to personally come to drag the screaming and crying Xue Meng out of Loyalty Hall so that Chu Wanning's corpse could be prepared and moved to Sisheng Peak's temporary resting place prior to burial.
Xue Meng fell sick right after and was bedridden with a high fever. In his sleep, he kept reliving Chu Wanning's death. The disciples could hear him crying when he was awake. Eventually, Tanlang Elder came and gave Xue Meng some sedatives. During this time, Shi Mei and Mo Ran were tasked to guard Chu Wanning's body at Loyalty Hall.
Chu Wanning's death posed a great loss for the whole cultivation realm. His contribution in sealing the Heavenly Rift far exceeded everyone else's. Such a formidable grandmaster had forever been wiped off the face of the earth. Representatives from each sect came one by one to offer their respects on the fourth day.
Jiang Xi and Hua Binan came to represent the Guyue'ye Sect. Although Jiang Xi harbored personal dislike toward Sisheng Peak, mutual grief caused him to act amicably toward Xue Zhengyong and Madam Wang.
When Chu Wanning was still posing as Xia Sini, he wore the smallest size of Sisheng Peak's uniform. After his identity was found out, he only wore the robe from Frozen Mist Silk that Jiang Xi gave him for practical purposes. Although the robe was soiled badly during the last battle, the disciples took care to clean and mend it before putting it back on Chu Wanning for burial purpose.
When Jiang Xi saw the robe on Chu Wanning, he sighed and said, "I never expected to give him his funeral attire."
He looked at Shi Mei and Mo Ran, who were kneeling in silence on the coffin's left and right sides.
"Where is Xue Ziming?"
Madam Wang was the one to answer him.
"Answering Sect Leader Jiang, my son is currently bedridden from grief. Yuheng Elder's death has been very traumatizing for him."
"Ah."
Hua Binan took out a bottle from inside his sleeves and offered it to Madam Wang.
"Madam Wang, this is one of my newest creations, the Tapir Fragrance Dew. When added to a drink, it can make children sleep better and improve their cultivation. I hope it is useful for Young Master Xue's sake."
"Thank you, Grandmaster Hua. I... May I give you some money for compensation...?"
Madam Wang came from Guyue'ye Sect. She knew that Guyue'ye products were extremely good but also very costly. After leaving Guyue'ye in such an undignified manner, she refused to owe them anything. Hua Binan merely shook his head in response.
"There is nothing else we can do to repay Chu-zongshi's sacrifice. He would want Young Master Xue to stop grieving for him. Please take the potion and let's not talk about the sordid topic such as money in front of him."
Madam Wang pressed her lips together and thanked him quietly.
After all guests left, Sisheng Peak prepared to move Chu Wanning's body to the Frostsky Hall. Unexpectedly, another guest made his appearance late into the night.
Master Huaizui from Wubei Temple arrived and wished to speak to Xue Zhengyong.
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