Chapter 1: [1] - "What a Fucked Up Situation"
"Can't you like... Explain it more properly?"
[Ugh! What part can't you understand?!]
"The part where out of bazillion number of people in the whole universe, I was chosen to be reincarnated in a fictional world?"
[Bazillion isn't even a number. Plus just like I said, the factor of luck is fucked up.]
"Stop joking with me, I've lived my life to the fullest and I know I ain't got that fucked up luck."
[Just... Can't you just accept this blessing? If I explained it to you the way you wanted, then I'm sure your mortal brain would fry up.]
"Heh... I dare you."
[Fine, don't blame me for this... Just as Divine Beings are born from the constant wishes and dreams of people, so too are fictional books and such. Every passing minute, a world of such is created; the laws of the omniverse affect it, and multiple factors come into play, preventing the 'desired' timeline of that world. But just like Divine Beings, these worlds have their own wills and will do anything to return to their desired timeline, thus creating the concept of 'Infinite Parallel Universes'. The constant flux of this phenomenon has increased by an overwhelming 1000%, sharply starting at 8:31 PM on January 28th of the Year 2018 on Planet Earth 8012. The Three Head Laws of the Omniverse began investigating and tracked down the culprit, which was said to be the reason why the Omniverse is in such imbalance and disarray. Now standing before me was the said culprit, paying for his sins and vowing to do his job to bring balance back to the Omniverse...]
"... So your telling me that my hobby of writing fanfictions caused me to be reincarnated in this fictional world?"
[Stop calling it fictional when its already a reality plane that you are gonna be living in. And answering your question, yes. For straight 50 years, every month, week, and day, you have created a single chapter for a story and dropped it instantly.]
"Hey! It's not my fault I easily get inspired..."
[Argh! Can't we just move on? You'll be given three gifts.]
"I'm sensing a but there..."
[Yes. But just like a Genie, there are some rules.]
"... I'm listening."
[First, you can't wish for things that can instantly or easily place you in Tier 4 or Continent-Destroying Class. Second, you can't use the wish to escape this job. Third, is something I'll think about later.]
"What?! The last one is kinda cheating."
[You can't do shit 'bout it.]
"That's fucked up..."
Heh...
'Don't underestimate me, System-looking motherfucker. I've already created a fanfiction like this situation, and I know what to do.' I grinned heavily whilst hiding it under my hand.
[You do know I'm so powerful I could read your mind, right?]
'I know. I've already foreseen this in one of my fanfics.'
[Stop acting like an overpowered edgelord, dumbshit.]
'One of my fanfics, I know the system would say this be-
[Just stop! Fuck, I'll give you three seconds, if you don't say your wish! Then kiss your ass goodbye to these precious wishes!]
'Ugh! Fine, can't handle a joke?'
"Before that, can you answer a question of mine?"
[That counts as one wish.]
'Damn... If I don't know the answer, then my next wishes can be useless in the long run... Fine.'
"Can I bring items, materials, or even people from other worlds back with me?"
[Well yeah, as long as it or they are holding you.]
'... Alright.'
"Well my first wish is simple... I want a Guild System!"
[An eye-opener, but not that much. We already expected this from someone like you.]
"So y'all have already foreseen this?"
[Obviously, we are all-powerful beings that could see the different timelines occurring in every single world. We already expected a lazy person like you wishing for something like this because you ain't gonna go to the countless of worlds alone.]
"... Heh."
[Stop.]
"... Anyways that's correct, but for my next wish is to be the Shadow Monarch!"
[That wish breaches the first rule.]
"Then... At least a System that could make me the Shadow Monarch. You said in the first rule, 'Instantly or Easily', so this is allowed, right?"
[That is correct, next.]
'Here it comes... When travelling through worlds, I always wondered why fanfics don't cover this problem. The fact that the characters seem to know the path to everywhere! Like they know where the treasures are hidden, I don't care if they are kissed in the ass by the Goddess of Luck, but I'm not a main protagonist so I know I ain't gonna be lucky like them.'
"I wish for a map! Something like a Universal map! Shows me the path to everywhere, stuff like that."
[It's official.]
"Yes!"
[That the third rule is no overpowered stuff.]
Heh.
'These bitches wanted me to suffer and train like Goku for fuckshits, but for me, the process doesn't matter, but the results does. Like the first rule, it can't be something 'instant', but something that could 'grow' is allowed.'
'Like a sword that gets stronger every single battle, a muscle that gets harder every single punch. They want this oh I know them.'
[What a fucking weirdo.]
Heh.
"Then I wish for a person!"
[Oh, you went that route. Seems like your not only an edgelord, but a horndog too.]
"This person would knowledgeable, has a skilled understanding, can pick up on new matter very fast... Everything that covers smartness!"
'I'm dumb as fuck, something like that cannot be fixed in short-term span of years. I need someone smart that can be an assistant or secretary of some sort...'
[May I understand why you never went to the route of items? Not like I don't know the answer of.]
"Ugh... Well its simple you see."
'I'm no unique guy that went through things or emotionless bitch-ass characters in stories, I know for a fact that loneliness is scary. And travelling through world of unknown is scary, if I'm gonna suffer, then I might as well have someone with me!'
[Your mind's fucked up.]
You do not know how overthinkers think.
[True, but anyways that wish's granted. Goodluck motherfucker, I don't expect much from you, but you're unlike those other people I reincarnated.]
"Aight bet. Thanks ROB."
[No problem, child.]
"Stop the act, bitch."
[What a lunatic, Goodbye.]
After feeling that I was finally alone in this house, I slumped in the couch and sighed. That was tiring as hell.
Looking out of the window, I couldn't help but think that my golden finger finally came after a few months of living here in Kuoh.
Yep, that's right. The Universe of Highschool DxD is the world that I am currently living on... Where fucking dragons and gods exists, bullshit like that and the power of plot where if you love breasts too much, you can end the world.
That was kinda depressing... But anyways, as long as I stay hidden, I can live through the times.
-_-_-_-
[ALERT: WELCOME, [PLAYER]]
[DAILY QUEST: Preparing to be Strong] has arrived.]
[ALARM: The System will Help the 'PLAYER's Growth]
[If He Fails to Obey the System's Orders, There may be a Penalty.]
-_-_-_-
"Oh my, speak of the devi- Scratch that, what if those Gremory bitches suddenly came through." I'm an overthinker at heart and at best.
"Anyways... I've wished for two System, so where's the other one?
{I have arrived, Host.}
"Great... Where my third wish?"
{She'll be arriving in a jiffy.}
"Great, a humorous system... How great."
'But a She?'
I grinned and was thankful. I wish to be lucky to have someone like Hinata Hyuga because of her Byakugan, or Speedwagon and his crazy and hot body.
Damn...
But finally, I started to see this magic circle thingy coming out of the ground.
My heart can't help but beat faster.
{Host, please calm your tits.}
"Oh my fucking god..." I rolled my eyes.
Lmao.
An orange head started coming out of the ground, and I couldn't help but smile in delight.
'Fuck... I think I'm gonna come.' That was a joke in my head, ignore that for fucks sake.
I swallowed my saliva and my breathe started becoming hectic.
Finally... She came out.
Looking around confused and scared, like a cat.
This was undoubtedly an SSS-Class waifu in the community.
"What... Where am I??!"
Cat-Burglar, Nami!
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