Chapter 27: 27 - Kairo's Smile
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with nowhere else left to run,
let us flee for now, and meet again with the sun.
I'll see you tomorrow,
with the false time that I have borrowed.
I hope that in our regress,
we have emerged from the cocoon of regrets.
-R.
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When they came back from today's training, the person who greeted them at the entrance of the manor this time was Alex.
Aisia was unsettled by how Kairo talked to the maid energetically as if nothing significant happened earlier. There was something out of place when it came to Kairo, she thought.
Throughout the day, she began to observe him. It was the first time she took a keen interest in every little bit of Kairo's movements. In her observation, she noticed a few things she hadn't paid attention to until recently.
The scars on his palms. The way he sometimes stared at nothing as if in a daze. The fact that he maintained eye contact with his kind eyes to whoever he spoke with, listening intently to them whatever the topic may be.
It wasn't merely small talk either, he was not dismissive nor unengaging like the mercenaries or other adults she eavesdropped on whenever she went to the city. When inexperienced on a topic, he would be inquisitive as if he was interested. When knowledgeable, he would hear out the other person's experiences first before relating to them with his own.
The way his eyes widened as he placed his fingers on his chin whenever he was in deep contemplation. He smiled and laughed a lot which brightened the air in every room he was in.
Even the crass and intimidating Tiraga was interested in him as she talked to him about cooking and accepted the small jars of spices he gave her. The recluse and soft-spoken Agata felt comfortable talking to him as he didn't belittle her for being a dark elf, may it be due to his ignorance of the scrutiny against them or he simply didn't care about it.
She would see Esmeralda go out of her way to talk to Kairo and sometimes glance at him with an analytical expression. She also heard from the maids' gossip that he helped in the conflict between the two lovebirds, Alex and Fredrick's falling out over their anniversary.
He was already a crucial part of this manor's family. Aisia noticed from how the maids in the mansion acted, that things would not be the same if he suddenly disappeared. He was never conceited, always polite even though he was a guest of the manor's master.
He was always smiling as if he didn't carry a single shred of sorrow.
"Ah," she thought. "This must be what it's like to be an adult. To be strong inside, not letting your true emotions show."
She then thought about how, unlike Kairo, she wore her emotions on her sleeves, to the point that Kairo would always ask her if something was wrong whenever she was feeling down. Even when he was in deep anguish, he was still always the first one to try and help anyone who he thought wasn't feeling the greatest.
She continued her observation even in the library. Kairo was reading a book about ecology. She sat across from him and peered at him over the random book she was reading as sneakily as she could.
But this only made her more conspicuous. Kairo finally asked, "Erm, is there something wrong?"
"Wrong? Nothing's wrong! What made you say that?"
"Well, you've been real quiet ever since we got home. And by now, I thought you would be asking me about words you're unfamiliar with. Unless you're finally able to read without my help. That's great!"
"Y-Yeah... that," she said as Kairo narrowed his eyes on the upside-down book she held.
Kairo closed his eyes and sighed, dropping his book about ecology on the table. "Spit it out. Why have you been eyeing me since we came home?"
She dropped her book too, thinking that it was unnecessary since she was already found out. "Well, I just thought... that it was bizarre how you had such anger from your... past, that you could still smile as if nothing was wrong."
"But there really is nothing wrong, Aisia."
"What do you mean?! Everything is wrong! You're such a kind person, but you've been dealt the worst cards!"
Kairo looked down with a melancholic expression. Aisia was frightened, thinking that she reminded him of his sadness until he spoke, "Not at all. Sure, bad things happened, but good things also happened. There was nothing I could do to prevent that tragedy, but this path had led me to meet people that I may not have otherwise met."
Aisia pursed her lips, processing Kairo's response. It was true, if he didn't go on a journey to exact vengeance for his village, or if his village wasn't attacked in the first place, him and Grisia would have never met, Kairo wouldn't have an immediate reason to travel to Jamais kingdom, and then she probably would have never crossed paths with him.
"But even so, how could you continue to smile even with all that?" she passionately blurted out.
"Well, for starters, it's because they don't know."
"Huh?"
"None of the maids or Fredrick know about my past. I don't know if Esmeralda already knows about it by now or if Grisia revealed it to her. But in this world, the only ones who know about me and my past are you and Grisia... and probably the red-robed figures who attacked my village."
"Then, you should tell them!"
Kairo shook his head slowly. "Like I said, there is nothing wrong. There is no reason to tell them about something like that. I don't want their pity. I want them to treat me normally. I don't want to live as a victim."
"Oh..." she uttered, finally drawing sense from Kairo's thought process. "That makes sense."
"And also, brooding doesn't suit me. During my journey, I've thought about it and decided that it was better to fill my days with happiness than have it be consumed by constant thoughts of... violence. I've already brooded quite enough alone, I was utterly lonely that I yearned for conversations."
Aisia felt like that answered why he was so absorbed in conversations.
"Sorry for... bringing it up then."
Kairo sighed, "Aisia, don't think for a moment that I've come to hate you," hearing this, she looked at him with her wide, hazel brown eyes, shocked that he knew of her anxieties. "I'm thankful that you've been worried about me. You really are a great friend. I think you would fit quite well with us if Nayani and Kayal were still here."
To be explicitly told that she was as close to him as his dearest friends, more than relief, it made her heart skip a beat. Tears started to form as she bawled out, "I... I was just so scared how you had all that in your mind but then when we went home, you acted as if nothing happened and kept smiling as if nothing happened, and, and—" she rambled as she cried.
"Sometimes, I forget that you're still a kid," Kairo smiled warmly. His comment made her cease her crying with one final sniffle, embarrassed that she was the one letting it all out when he was the one suffering. But Kairo assured, "Don't be mistaken, I don't see it as a bad thing. I wish that even when we grow old, you don't lose that youth, that child-like innocence."
Though she stopped crying, there were still some sniffles here and there as she responded, "You're also a kid too, Kairo."
Kairo's eyes widened for a moment before returning into a weary smile. "Yes. Yes, I am."
He walked to the other side of the long table, sitting beside Aisia and consoling her by patting her on the back.
"You're a smart and caring friend, Aisia. You've only observed me for a day, but you've already noticed a lot about me," he said with a friendly grin.
"Stop consoling me! You like books right? Stop thinking about me and let's continue reading!" she insisted even though her face was still wet with snot and tears. She continued reading her book with vigor.
Somehow, she still felt like not everything was crystal clear to her yet, that something was amiss, and if she never found out exactly what it was, she would lose her already loose grasp over it.
Without thinking it through, she simply wanted to do something that Kairo liked to do, and reading was the first thing that came to her mind. She was tired of always being comforted by Kairo as he did just now. Supposedly, her plot was to be the one to comfort him this time, but the scenario they were in was far from it.
In the end, she felt frustrated that Kairo still used his "adult smile" on her.
"Sure. But wipe your nose and face first. Grisia might be surprised to see his books have dried snot all over them the next time he opens them," Kairo responded with a soft chuckle.
From the shadows, in a small space behind the bookshelves, Grisia and Esmeralda stalked the two in secrecy. Without making a sound, Esmeralda inched her fingers closer to the wall. The shadow she cast with her arm grew into an ominous, dark goop on the wall. It shrunk into nothing once they both entered it, leaving behind no signs that they were ever there.
Weekly Power Status
-- Power
Ranking 
-- Power
stone