Bright sunray touches ella's soft skin. She opens her eyes with confusion.
"Oh! it's not my room! hmmm....should I sleep a little more?" ella murmured. Then she suddenly jumped up from bed and went to wash up!
"ummm...Aunt what're you doing? Is noah still sleeping?"
" Ahh!! you're up? yea he'll be up after a while. Breakfast is on the table"(aunt Simi)
Ella is currently with her 3rd Aunt simi and noah is her 4 year boy. Her husband is in USA.
the first week went smoothly. Breakfast,eat,shower, feed noah, play with him, study ,eat,sleep. But Ella suddenly started feeling uncomfortable. Then one of her cousin came to visit.
"So How do u feel here ella?" (cousin sara)
"it's good here but i wish all of you were here today"(ella)
"You don't even talk that much How'll you feel
happy?"(simi)
"no... it's cus it's my first time..if everyone's here it'll be different situation"(ella)
"I'll ask mom to come next week if she's free. Has Noah gotten free with you?"(sara)
"yeah she takes good care of Noah . He likes her too"(Simi)
Cousin Sara left that day cus of work!!
the next day afternoon-
after 2 hour wrestling with Noah Ella managed to put him to sleep! It's pretty tough to feed Noah cus He spits food from mouth and doesn't wanna eat.
"Aunt, let Noah sleep in my room. He'll be awake if u move him". Ella said while she sat behind Noah.
"sure"
in the soft sunlight ella was reading a book and watching after Noah but suddenly Noah just jumped and rolled over from bed and fell down on floor with his eyes closed. There was a huge sound. It happened in a second. Ella was too shocked to do anything. Noah Started screaming in a High pitched voice and ella ran and took him in her arms but her Aunt rushed here to ella and snatched Noah saying-
"you motherfu*ker, useless bi*ch Where were your eyes???"
"huh?I- oh! wha-" she was wayy too shocked her mind stopped working with these incidents and words. that was her first time hearing swear words. she was confused about what she felt then but one thing was sure she wanted to go home!
Present Ella-
I know i was pathetic back then. But it felt too much since it was my first time hearing those words while i was already feeling uncomfortable. and you know I never knew how to handle kids, taking care of them by myself is far from it. Still I tried my best. and Noah is really hard to handle. so i was having mixed thoughts then. I felt like a burden.
"your own aunt swore at you??!Did she apologize?? You didn't leave that place?" (me)
"well no.... after a hour when Noah got better She said look, i loose my mind i get angry i don't know what I said Just forget it don't mind it... and I said it's fine.. Then luckily next day my 2nd aunt came and took me to her place. But after that I just couldn't open up to them as I thought I could and it became a hassle later. They started calling me uncultured, unsocial person. Well it is true. LOL.And then I overheard their phn conversation" Ella said when sge sighed.
"My 2nd aunt was saying to my 4th aunt How does big sis takes care of that girl? She's so picky and doesn't even talk. This is hard. Isn't that quite a burden?
Ahh! after hearing this I thought to myself thanks for removing my confusion." ella said while her jet black eyes got watery as she was remembering all those feelings again while telling me!
"That night I kept saying to myself, mom! I love you I miss you I'll be good pls come back and take me! My heart hurts pls come back quickly, I'll be good. I miss you mom ,I miss you, I miss you"
"After all these days my sis came to meet me . she used to live with my 4th aunt then. I couldn't share everything since we weren't that close but she could tell i wasn't comfortable so after all the asking i told her that aunt swore at me and she said to forget it cus i might've heard wrong. so I didn't aay much about it.
and then she left for her tour. After spending 2 months there I came to a conclusion that family members are the most dangerous poison. At least in my case, of course not everyone is same some family love is so pure and warming. But my 13 years self thought there's nothing called family love. The first "family love" i faced still is traumatic to me." ella said with a smile.
" then My mom and dad came back she hugged me tight and i Hugged her tightly and didn't wanna let go
i felt like I could breath again..Then i came back to my home, my room and slept peacefully after strolling for 32 days and counting hours and Shedding tears"