Chapter 14: Lonesome
Though I'd usually have been able to tell how far we'd traveled, I anxiously dissociated and lost track of time and space long before Siridan finally stopped running. I knew this wasn't the case, but it felt like he carried me and ran through the seemingly unending forest for several days.
When he began looking for a fitting place to set up camp, he tried to let me go, but I kept clinging to his chest and shoulders, determined to keep his face out of my field of view.
"Oh, so now you wanna be indecisive again…" He groaned. "First, you want me to let you go. And now that I'm trying to, you refuse to walk? What are you, four?"
I furrowed my brows and kept my silence, and when he understood that I wasn't going to cooperate, he let out a long sigh and tightened his arm around my back, readjusting my position against him with an exasperated bounce.
Embarrassing as it may have been, I had an inkling that if I tried to stand, I'd collapse under my weight and break down completely. Instead, I opted to burrow my face into Siridan's shoulder and stain it with a few tears that managed to escape my eyes despite my best efforts.
Leaves and twigs cracked under his footsteps as he silently searched the area. My eyes were closed, and though he didn't explain what he was up to, I knew what was happening from years of experience traveling with him in my past life.
Running water, shade, and a good amount of firewood – just some of the things Siridan was looking for. I could hear the sound of the flowing river to my right. The blowing wind brushed through my hair and rustled a few leaves on the ground to my left.
The usually-refreshing environment of the forest never felt so unwelcoming before. I was stuck with an unpleasant, suffocating feeling akin to that of an ensnared prey animal that got itself caught hours ago and had given up on its escape.
I breathed deeply in a desperate attempt to calm myself, mistakenly forgetting where I buried my face, and the scent immediately hit me.
A whiff of something spicy yet sweet flooded my lungs, and I recognized it right away as Siridan's favorite drink – and, with it, enveloped, came a masked yet present smell that made my nose tickle.
Without recognizing what I was doing, I took another breath of the pleasant aroma, subtly and groggily rubbing my nose against it. Something about it felt reassuring and warm, unlike the forest around me, which had gradually turned cold enough to make me shiver.
Merely inhaling the scent told a story; it manifested through exertion and was likely fresh. Even when obscured by the smell of alcohol, it was powerful and encaptivating – potent enough to make me wish I was drowning in it and forgetting my sorrows.
Hey, moron. The back of my mind awakened to admonish me. You're sniffing him.
I jumped out of Siridan's hold like a panicked squirrel, and he offered no resistance to the moment of sudden squirming in his surprise. He shifted back as I landed on all fours and sprung up to stand tensely.
"…Better late than never, I guess." Are you ready to walk, or do I need to tie your hands up?"
My face was beet red with embarrassment at my late realization, and I tried to hide it as best I could by looking away from him and hoping it looked as if I was mad. I nodded fiercely and walked along with him, staying a few steps ahead, just in case.
Soon enough, Siridan found a comfortable enough place to stop – right by the bottom of a small waterfall, where no insects or predators gathered. I expected what came next.
Siridan reached into one of his pockets and retrieved a small platinum-colored medallion. It shone brightly – and a bit unnaturally – as he held it between his fingers.
Crack.
It snapped in two, and the spell within it unleashed, inscribing sigils into the air without a spoken incantation or a guiding hand. Though I saw them exchanging hands every so often, it was a while since I last saw an Adventurer's Blessing put to use.
It was a magical item made in the guild by skilled enchanters – and its purpose was to conveniently store a day's traveling supplies without encumbering the carrier. Soon enough, it all manifested: a fully equipped tent, a portable cooking set, a matching set of sleeping bags, and so on.
Without wasting time, Siridan set up a campfire, lit it, and then proceeded to arrange everything else, which left me with no choice but to settle close to the vaguely comforting warmth for the time being.
After a few minutes came and went, I had forgotten most of my embarrassment – and in its hollow void grew my contempt for my situation. I missed the forest. I really did. But I also loved my new, peaceful life.
Siridan soon finished preparing the camp, and when he returned to sit by the campfire, he tried talking to me again. He kicked the ground absent-mindedly as he settled, then looked in my direction.
"Did I drop your tongue somewhere on the way here or something? You could at least talk."
I wasn't in the mood to do so.
The campfire crackled in front of me as I sat there, huddled in the fetal position on my side. My hair lay against the dirt as I watched the flames and came to peace with the fact that even if I were to try to find my way back, I'd get lost for long enough to starve and die.
Twice over, the life I chose for myself was ripped away from my grasp by this man. I didn't want to let that truth be erased from my mind, even if it managed to fool itself into being comfortable when he was holding me.
"Silent treatment, huh? Should've guessed." Siridan finally said impatiently. "—Just so you know, I'm not gonna let you go on a hunger strike."
I hadn't even thought of doing it before he brought it up – but in my bitterness? I felt a bit tempted.
Weekly Power Status
-- Power
Ranking 
-- Power
stone