Chapter 43: CH 41: Sparksville (E6)
(A/N: I didn't want to skip any episodes, hence why this chapter. But hey, we at least got some bonding fluff time. Also, do you think I should skip some episodes or not?)
Alistair :"You know, I think necromancers should be buff as hell instead of lanky skeletons."
Shego :"Why?"
Alistair, Leonardo DiCaprio smug face :"Because of how much... deadlifting they do."
Shego didn't look impressed.
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"Another job well done." Alistair hummed with a smile, entering the trailer attached to the RV, which he had personally built with Ultimate Tinkerer, with Shego following behind him. (A/N: You have no fucking idea how much I searched to find out that thing's (trailer) name.)
His eyes landing on his precious pet, he immediately squatted and played with Tigris's fluffy cheeks, cooing in a baby voice :"Aww, if it isn't my darling Tigris! Did you just woke up from you nap?"
Tigris, who had stopped resisting already and had opted to enjoy the spoiling, chuffed with a smile. Enjoying the petting as he gently licked Alistair's hand, making his heart melt.
"Oh, my, god! You're so freaking ADORABLE!" Alistair hugged him tightly, shaking him fondly in his arms. Tigris, who would struggle in the past, simply enjoyed the attention instead. Going as far as to put his paws on Alistair and moving with him.
(A/N: Aight, do any of you know where I can get me a blue tiger?)
Even Shego, who was always prone to banters and sarcastic remarks, couldn't help but pet the blue tiger :"Seriously, nothing about you is ordinary. You're so weird. You've got a supernatural tiger as a pet and a villain as a sidekick."
"Well, weird doesn't always mean bad." He sighed deeply in fulfillment after getting his hourly feel of fluff. Lifting his face off of Tigris's fur, he smirked up at Shego :"And besides, what's weird about me collecting amazing individuals?
My pet is a literal walking lucky charm that can affect the laws of probability, and my sidekick is an amazing sexy woman with superpowers who would definitely become the greatest villain to humanity if she wasn't content with just being a sidekick.
I believe it would be weird if I —didn't— get you two on my side, no?"
As if the world demanded it, the trailer suddenly shook when it ran over a bump sharply. Causing Alistair, who was kneeling on one leg, to lose his balance and fall.
Fall towards Shego's crotch. Alistair's shock turned into a smirk :'Ah, I knew I made the right choice with Tigris.'
Feeling his face smash right against her crotch, his nose coincidentally hitting her clit, her legs buckled as she yelped in surprise. He enjoyed the moment to its fullest, before he quickly moved away before she could prepare to attack.
(A/N: I'm in urgent need of a blue tiger, you know?)
Wearing a dopey smile, he looked at the blushing and glaring Shego :"See? The benefits of getting the lucky charm tiger are already showing. So?"
Standing up, he towered over her :"Were my decisions right? Or wrong?"
She glared with a blush, before giving up with a huff :"You're the super genius, so why ask me?"
Alistair shook his head :"Now I wouldn't say that. You're pretty smart for yourself." Walking over to the desk with the latest projects he was working on resting on it, he sat on his chair and put his feet on the table comfortably :"Why else would I leave the editing of our episodes to you?"
"Fair enough, I guess." She shrugged, walking to sit on the couch in the house/workshop :"So? What are we gonna do now? I'm bored."
"I honestly wanted to ask you that. I don't feel like making anything, and don't have anything else to do either. Any suggestions for two superpowered individuals?"
"Hmm... hmmm... ugh! I hate times like this!" She laid down on the couch in annoyance :"It's like there's nothing to do in the world!"
"Do you even know any activities besides... you know, commiting crimes?"
"Yeah, duh. The problem is, we can't do any of those while on the road. No shopping, no beaches to go, no nothing."
"I was talking more in the lines of indoor activities. Hmm... have you ever played video games?"
"Hm? Like those on Playstation or computers? Do I look like a kid to you?"
Alistair's eyes widened as he quickly grabbed his right hand before it could move on its own :'No, calm down! Calm down, yes, calm down. Phew, my slap a bitch hand was about to move on its own.
No, I must correct this blasphemous mindset! No sidekick of mine can insult games in such a manner!'
Taking a deep breath, he calmed himself down. Crazy or not, he was a good boss. And instead of getting mad or belittling his employees, he would correct them gently like a good boss would do.
So instead of arguing, he was going to show her the wonders of games instead. Getting up, he moved to the large TV and playstation the couch was facing :"Well, how about you see if it's for children by having a match against me in football?"
"You mean soccer?"
"I'll actually hit you."
"Wha- it's not like I said anything wrong! It's commonly known as soccer in the US."
"Well, you can suck on these nuts! Anyway, it's football or your salary is reduced this month!"
"Wha... huff~, you're so unreasonable at the most stupid things. Fine, it's football. There, happy?"
"*Smiling* Very much so! Now let's start playing."
Taking two wireless controllers to the couch, he handed one to her. Not willing to sit up, she moved her legs so he could sit, before placing her legs on his thighs.
"So are you going to teach me how to work with these or not?"
"Alright, so this is" After teaching her everything, they were finally ready to play. With Alistair choosing Barcelona for himself and Real Madrid for Shego.
(A/N: Ah, the good old times where you could choose the goats in their own rightful places. Damn, do I miss the past.)
But as the game started, Shego's eyes widened :"W-whoa, hold on. Video game graphics aren't supposed to be like this, right?" What she was looking at wasn't pixelated moving figures, but actual people, as if she was moving characters in a film.
Alistair smirked :"Darling, as a gamer, you wouldn't have expected me to work on destructive weapons and ignore my actual joy, video games, right?"
Once a gamer, always a gamer. If the games weren't to his standards, he would make them fit his standards. Who cared about super destructive weapons and robots, he would rather upgrade games.
And that's what he did. The graphics he was looking at weren't even in his previous life. They were literally playing with graphics that were like the real world. He smirked proudly :'This is what intelligence should be used for.'
"Damn, boss. You'd make it BIG big as a game developer. Like, holy crap..."
"Hahahaha, actually, I was thinking of that. I do need an actual fun hobby after all."
"And making entire games is gonna be a hobby?"
"For me, making the best games wouldn't even take a week. Oh, on that note, please work on buying a video game publisher company named Ubisoft."
'Since I'm at this day and age, I might as well work on saving some franchises that were ruined too. Forget about people, just Assassin's Creed is worth the entire humanity.'
"Hm? Do we have enough budget for it- wait, how is that not a foul?! You basically broke my player's leg!"
"Don't worry, I should have enough money after mass producing the cure for cancer. Also, as you just saw, I hit the ball. Not the player."
"Fine, then I'll look into it- wait, why is mine a foul then?! Wait, a yellow card?! You fucking with me?! Oh, you definitely must have rigged this game!"
No longer comfortable with just laying down, she sat down and concentrated on the game while Alistair chuckled :"Yeah, keep telling yourself that."
"Oh, I'm definitely kicking your ass- oh come on, goalkeeper! How didn't he catch that?!"
"Hahahaha, I think we're not going to be bored anymore. Oh, hey, Tigris." He welcomed the tiger that came to join them. As he laid down on Alistair's lap comfortably, they continued their game.
-
Finally reaching their destination, they waited for Max to excitedly open the RV's door :"Now, all of you, close your eyes." Closing them, they walked out before Max spoke again :"Okay, open them up!"
Their eyes opened, curious to see what Max had hyped them up so much for. "Ta-da!" Max exclaimed, but the view wasn't as exciting as he believed it to be :"Welcome to Sparksville."
The ground deadpanned. Even Tigris. The place was basically a ghost town. They couldn't even see anybody. The only sounds that were heard besides them was the cowing of a random crow.
That didn't seem to be what Max thought, however. He looked super excited :"Is this place great or what?"
Shego looked around in confusion :"More like does this place even have anybody living in it or what?"
Ben :"I'll go with "or what". With both questions."
Max :"Come on. What's more exciting than the world's biggest fish ball?"
All of them :"Um, everything."
Shego groaned :"Please tell me this is a joke. My and Alistair's competition was not interrupted in its crucial moment for... this?"
Alistair smirked :"Yeah, the crucial moment of me scoring the 10th goal while barely into the second half."
Shego was about to retort, but a man in blue suit, wearing the same blank expressions as Null but even blanker, interrupted them :"As the mayor of Sparksville, I welcome you seekers of wonder.
It's a pleasure to welcome the two most famous superheroes, the Predator and the Savior, to our humble town. Also, please be careful of the blue tiger." Although he said so, his face didn't change at all.
It was alright, Max enough excitement for the both of them :"I know you guys are probably excited to see —it—, so I'll go check us in." Handing Alistair four tickets before walking away.
Sighing in defeat, Shego hit the road :"Alright, let's see what this "town" has in store for us." The three of them and Tigris quickly followed her, with Alistair smiling :"Come on, —it— could have some kind of surprise for us."
"Oh, don't you start with that now. I mean, come on! Look at this place! When you think of "boring", you think of this place!"
Alistair chuckled, patting her shoulder :"Believe me, you just need to leave it to Ben and Gwen to make some exciting chaos."
Ben/Gwen :"Hey!"
Alistair smirked :"Wanna bet on whether they'll create some major ass problem by tomorrow?"
"Hmm... alright, I'm in. You'll buy me a sandwich if you lose."
"Deal. And you'll buy me some chili fries."
"Deal. But seriously though, you've been eating a lot of chili fries lately. *Patting his abs* You might get fat before you know it if you're not careful."
"The peak of a race does not get fat, woman! Aso, they're kind of addictive, so I can't help it."
"You mind sharing some of that "peak human" DNA with us so I wouldn't need to worry about my figure?"
"Heh, sorry, but there can only be one "peak of humanity", and that's yours truly."
"Oh, piss off."
-
Tomorrow came, and lo and behold, Alistair's prophecy came true. While they were sleeping in the upside down beds stuck to the walls, Max's confused and concerned voice woke them up :"What the heck happened here?"
(A/N: Those beds look uncomfortable as fuck, ngl.)
While Alistair and Shego woke up calmly, groaning from their bad sleeping position, Ben and Gwen fell straight down in panic. With the latter of the two whispering to her cousin in panic :"Ah, he knows everything! We are —so— busted. We have to come clean and tell Grandpa everything.
Ben rolled his eyes, whispering quietly so the other two wouldn't hear :"Sometimes, it's hard to believe you're really a kid. Never admit anything until you absolutely have to. Got it?"
"Benjamin, Gwendolyn, get out here." Max's voice came, causing Alistair to smirk at the duo :"Oooh! Whatever you two did, you're screwed, because full names were just used."
Weekly Power Status
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