Alexandra and her mother started to head towards the living room. The familiar room immediately entering her sight or view once she entered. The living room was just small and there were two couches that surrounded a small glass table and television not too far away from the glass table that placed on top of a wooden desk. Nothing fancy, everything was just simple and it looked cheap, however, Alexandra didn't complain. As long as her mother is here, she's happy and contented. "What would you like to do?" Her mother asked as they arrived while Alexandra was roaming her eyes around still observing her surroundings, the feeling of nostalgia overwhelming her. The atmosphere which surrounded the place was warm, bubbly, and light.
When Alexandra heard her mother's question, she fell into silence as she thought for a moment. Singing would just exhaust mother and it would be better when she does it before I go to sleep or something, she thought to herself. She doesn't like to draw and it's exhausting or tiring to do so, maybe asking her mother to tell her a story will do. "Tell me a story! A really good one!" A story that might replace or temporarily forget the story which Diana told her, half of the reason why she cried and she doesn't know what the other reason is. When Diana was telling her that story, it feels like the characters were real, as if what the boy said to the girl was really familiar. As if she heard those words before but she didn't recall having the memory. It was making her headache as she thinks more and more about it, so she focused on the current place or even she is in now and enjoy the moment she has with her mother which might just be a fragment of her imagination or a dream which she longed for. The feeling she was feeling right now felt real as if she was in the real world.
Her mother smiled at her sweetly and they walked towards the couch while holding Alexandra's hand and they sat on it. Her mother hoisted Alexandra up and placed her on top of her lap and hugged her from behind, but not too tight to not make her breathe but loose enough to remind Alexandra that it was there. "What story would you like me to tell you?" The sweet and gentle sound of her mother's voice rang inside Alexandra's ears and it sounded melodic, like the voice of an angel. "Something that had a good and happy ending!" Alexandra said in a cheerful tone of voice and her mother couldn't help but chuckle at what she said. "I see, you still can't handle sad stories or stories with sad and tragic endings," Alexandra pouted at what she said and shortly after, her mother heaved a sigh before she opened her mouth to speak and tell her about a story of a mother and a daughter who happily lived alone.
"One day, there was a mother who had a beautiful and sweet daughter," Her mother started. "What are their names?" Alexandra immediately asked, curiosity lacing her tone of voice as she spoke and her mother giggled before she responded, "Let me finish first,"
"The daughter's name was Alexandra and the mother's name was Claudia," And after Alexandra heard what her mother said, the realization hit her like a flash of lightning or a bullet passing through her head. Right, as far as I could remember, my mother's first name is Claudia and my name in my previous life also came from my father who left my father when he learned that she got pregnant by their acts. With a note saying 'I'm sorry' and cash underneath, he left and didn't appear in front of them once again. Her second and third name, Alice and Elizabeth, was from her mother's name too, she thought to herself, a serious expression plastered on her face. Her train of thoughts was cut off and she was pulled back to reality by her mother's voice when she continued what she said earlier.
"Claudia was a mother who is willing to do anything for her daughter and Alexandra was a daughter who never realizes the efforts of her mother. One afternoon, when Alexandra returned home from school, she saw her mother working instead of resting because she was sick. She shouted, 'Mother, what are you doing? You should be resting! Don't push yourself,' was what Alexandra said but her stubborn mother just continued doing her work and ignored her daughter," Her mother said and somehow, that made Alexandra pout as if her mother was referring to her daughter. I'm not that naïve to never realize your efforts, she thought to herself and was about to say that out loud when her mother spoke once again, interrupting her moment or time to speak.
"Claudia, after a few minutes of ignoring her daughter, said, 'Go to your room and rest first, okay? You must be tired from school,' she said but that just earned a frown from Alexandra who was also stubborn and hard-headed as her. Alexandra replied back to her mother, not removing the frown that was plastered on her face as she spoke in an annoyed tone of voice, 'But what about you? You are working day and night, even if you are sick, you are still working. Why are you doing this?' Although the answer was obvious, Alexandra was naïve and dense to know what that is. Her mother responded with a smile plastered on her face, 'Everything that I have done is for you and for your future, to save and help you," Her mother paused to take a breath first and after that, she opened her mouth and started speaking once again in a calm and gentle tone of voice. A smile and gentle expression plastered on her face, she could feel how warm and loving her mother's gaze is.
"Her daughter responded, 'What if I lied to you or did something bad? Will you still help me or save me?' Her mother just showed her a smile before she responded a few seconds later, 'I am a mother and it is my duty to not let you take that path, I will ensure that you will be a kind person. But if you turned into a criminal or a bad person, I will never stop loving you and will try my best to save you. It's normal for us humans to commit a sin and it's up to you if you will ask for forgiveness or just let yourself rot by the sin you committed,' and after that, they hugged," Alexandra hated to admit it but the story was kinda lame but she was able to get the message what her mother was trying to say to her. Her mother wasn't good at making stories, she was good at songs and making one. "You see, my daughter, a mother's love will never perish and would always remain even if you turned into a bad person. A mother's love can be either shown in a bad way or a good way, I can't give you one specific example but just remember that I will always love you and I am always there for you, no matter what kind of form or body I am in, even when I grow old or forget my memories. Because you can't easily forget the feelings even if you erased or got rid of the memory," Somehow, there is something deeper to what Alexandra's mother said but Alexandra didn't bother to think about what that is.
"I love you," Alexandra said out of blue and that made her mother tightened the hug she was giving to her daughter. "I love you too, a trillion times more than you thought," Her mother replied and Alexandra couldn't help but to giggle at what her mother responded. After that, they decided to just go play around with some blocks and papers like drawing even though she doesn't want to do it at first. They spent their whole morning and afternoon just goofing around doing nothing but playing and spending quality time together and Alexandra immediately forgot the reality that she was in.
Evening came and they finished eating dinner as well as taking a bath. Alexandra laid down her bed which wasn't that soft unlike her bed at the room of her palace but she didn't complain, her mother tucked her in and sat beside her. Her weight gently sank against the softness of the bed and Alexandra could feel it but she just ignored it and stared at her mother who also stared back at her.
Alexandra opened her mouth to speak and what came out was a mutter which her mother just perfectly heard, "I'm suffering, mom. I don't know what to do," She said and her mother's eyes widened for a moment as she stared at her when she heard her say that. What she meant that she was suffering from her life at the palace as the emperor's daughter, it was stressing and hard. She doesn't want to depend on anyone because it was her problems and it might also stress them out and might avoid me because of it.
Her mother's features softened and a sad smile was adorned on her small and pale face, her eyebrows slightly upturned as she stared at her daughter who had the expression which shows that she was really having a hard time and she can't deny it, she wants help but she doesn't want to depend on anyone. She knows her daughter too well, she's independent and doesn't like to trouble others by telling them her problems and asking help from them. What she needs right now is just a person that would listen to her. "Tell me everything," Her mother said and that urged for Alexandra to tell her everything but not totally everything. Probably she was ranting or unleashing or releasing the emotions she bottled up for like 7 years.
"I don't know if you will believe me but I was sort of reborn with the memories of my past life and it sucks having to experience everything in a painful way. My father slowly started to love me but I don't know if he still hates me. My brothers hated me because I stole their mother and I was the reason why she died. They hated how unknown or mysterious I was and I wanted to get along with them, my youngest older brother was the kindest one and I was slowly getting along with the second oldest one. I don't even know who I am at the world and what can I do, I, myself, don't know who I am. There are these people who have always been there for me since birth and I met a person who makes me either happy, annoyed, sad, or angry. But whenever I'm around him, there's this sudden aching pain in my heart and my head hurts, I would usually cry when I'm around him. He was so unknown to me yet he felt so familiar, I would always hear this familiar voice inside my head," She let everything out. Every meter, every inch, every portion of her emotions leaked out. She was like a homeless or abandoned child who was stopping her tears from falling. She was back to her 18-year-old self who was also the Alexandra, the emperor's one and only daughter.
She knows that she should be strong but she couldn't help but to also doubt and think about this kind of thing. Her mother had a worried expression on as she listened to her daughter let everything out, she was breathing heavily, it feels like there is something heavy on her shoulders but as she let everything out, the heavyweight slowly became light and she was slowly starting to breathe normally. "It was hard. It was like I had done or committed a grave sin in my past to experience those type of things but still, I couldn't help but be thankful because there are some people who stayed by my side and had faith in me," Alexandra said, slowly starting to calm down. A few tears escaped her eyes but she just let it be until eventually, nothing came out anymore which indicated that she already calmed down.
Alexandra felt two thin yet warm arms embrace her in a hug and Alexandra returned the hug back while sniffing. "You have suffered so much," Her mother said and Alexandra just nodded. "But I know that eventually, the time will come where you will be happy. I have faith in you that you will be able to surpass all of these, you are a strong and brave person and I have known that since the day you were born," Her mother said and Alexandra melted into the hug. Drowsiness slowly started to invade her and she couldn't help but to yawn and feel sleepy. Her eyelids were getting heavy and anytime soon, she will fall asleep.
"Mom, I'm getting sleepy," Alexandra blurted out.
"Sleep. Good night,"
"Good night, I love you,"
"I love you too and remember, I'm always there for you," Was the last thing Alexandra heard before completely closing her eyes.
Thank you for reading. I hope you liked this chapter!
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